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To ask teachers why they do it and how they cope and don't end up crying when they come home of an evening?

(62 Posts)
LesleyPumpshaft Mon 08-Oct-12 05:56:57

I had to take a kids martial arts class last weekend with DS 13. I had a chest infection, granted, but it was fucking traumatic and DS and I never want to do it ever again. I think Sensei is really pissed off with us about it.

How the hell do teachers manage it? Especially ones that teach at secondary school? All I can think is that they must be mad, have not realised what they were getting themselves into or have nerves of steel.

Even teaching the little ones must be nearly as bad. My parents were both teachers, and my dad wangled early retirement. They were always stressed and moaning. My dad hated every minute of it (secondary school). He used to refer to the children and parents as "the shower of shit". The pay is good, and you get good holidays, pension and middle class professional status. Is that the appeal for most people?

How the hell do you not end up having nenrvous breakdowns and being in tears every evening. Hats off to you, I wouldn't and couldn't do it. I like children, but not enough to spend most of my week with 30 of them.

AnnaKissed Mon 08-Oct-12 17:10:54

I think the key thing in teaching is relationships. OP you were bound to get the worst behaviour if you were covering a class as a one off. Secondary schools teacher who have worked in the school a long time have mutual respect and good relationships with their pupils.

A class of moody, aggressive 15 year olds is a lot less intimidating if you have known them as eager 11 year olds in brand new blazers!

DrCoconut Mon 08-Oct-12 10:34:48

I admit to getting wound up when people make jibes about part timers, holidays (at college we don't get the same as the students), gold plated pensions etc. As it happens I do work part time but that is because I am by choice on a fractional contract.

noblegiraffe Mon 08-Oct-12 09:55:50

Ooh, I remember the last time I was told to fuck off! It was a couple of years ago, a Y9 told me to 'go fuck myself' as he stormed out of the classroom. My response was not to cry, rather to sigh as he had just created extra paperwork for me. He was excluded for 3 days, perhaps that's why I don't get told to fuck off very often! Funnily enough I often see the same lad in the corridor now he's in Y11 and he always has a cheery hello for me.

Bad behaviour tends to wash over me, dealing with it is usually more tedious than frustrating. Sometimes a kid can really wind you up though, especially when they say something like 'I don't get it because you're a crap teacher' when they've not paid the slightest bit of attention to the lesson. Grrr.

mummytime Mon 08-Oct-12 09:54:53

I quit training as a secondary teacher, but it wasn't the kids. They were lovely even/especially the naughty ones. It was the sheer mountain of paperwork, and jumping through hoops.

MissAnnersley Mon 08-Oct-12 09:53:47

Teaching is a great job - I love it. No, I don't cry at the end of a day. grin

I love the fact that I am so busy. A day at work just flies in and I will reach a certain point in the afternoon when I realize I haven't eaten or gone to the toilet. I think that is an indicator of how engrossing a job it is.

I wouldn't want to do anything else.

minxthemanx Mon 08-Oct-12 09:51:25

And the worst part of the job is not the kids, it's difficult, rude and aggressive and rude parents. hmm

minxthemanx Mon 08-Oct-12 09:49:35

BTW I teach Year 6 (31 kids) two days a week, and Foundation Stage (30 kids) on the other day. One extreme to the other!

minxthemanx Mon 08-Oct-12 09:48:22

There are days that it is unbelievably stresful, that I have no time to eat or go to the toilet, or breathe deeply. But every day, somewhere, I laugh with the kids, or help someone to learn, or make them feel better about themselves, or teach them a fact. I am permanently knackered, and only work 3 days a week. But I wouldn't change career for anything - been doing this 22 years, and love it. It's as simple as that.

Mintyy Mon 08-Oct-12 09:48:13

Are you being unreasonable about what?

StarlightMcKenzie Mon 08-Oct-12 09:46:25

I would love love LOVE to teach year 6!!!!

One day.......

Whistlingwaves Mon 08-Oct-12 09:43:02

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BigFatLegsInWoolyTIghts Mon 08-Oct-12 09:40:56

I was wondering this OP....I once took 20 10 year olds for a drama class and it was frigging AWFUL!. I was a mess! It's a leaves some people a gibbering wreck.

echt Mon 08-Oct-12 09:38:48

I used to be in tears quite often in my last school in the UK, and I had been teaching for 25+ years.

It's never happened since I came to Australia. The main difference is the lack of OFSTED, league tables, and a supportive SLT. All of these things could change, of course, and the government would love to have the top-down management systems of the UK.

I'm now as good a teacher as I can be. Nothing of any substance is in my way. That's the difference.

LesleyPumpshaft Mon 08-Oct-12 08:37:50

Tbh I think I would come home and cry too, but then I am highly strung, emotional and anxious at the best of times. It really doesn't take much!

Ashvis Mon 08-Oct-12 08:35:26

50smells, I've just picked myself off the floor after laughing so hard after your comment bout primary kids being cute! Lots of them are, yeah, but trust me, they are not all cute and lovely! I taught for almost 10 years before leaving the profession to raise my son and taught every stage from nursery to P7 and being perfectly honest, I much preferred teaching older children. I worked with one very little boy who trashed the classroom on several occasions, threatened people at home with knives...And he was only 5!

Some days I did go home in tears, after finding out some of the young kids I worked with had been sexually abused or seriously physically and emotionally abused, that stuff is incredibly hard to deal with. What you have to do as a teacher is remember that you only have them for a limited time and can't protect them outside school so you have to make your classroom a lovely, safe environment.

I never cried because of children's poor behaviour though because you can't start thinking that they only behave that way cause they hate you. Bad behaviour has lots of different causes behind it and a good teacher takes the time to learn why. I love teaching, even working with the crazy kids is massively rewarding but I'm not sure if I'll return to teaching because of the crazy ass paperwork and the changing goal posts.

CreamOfTomatoSoup Mon 08-Oct-12 08:35:19

I teach secondary. Sometimes I do come home and cry! But the kids are very entertaining.You learn to develop a very thick skin.

LesleyPumpshaft Mon 08-Oct-12 08:11:07

The whole thing about goal posts shifting is really stressful. I've never been a teacher, but had that when I was managing websites. The worst thing was a bullying boss. I used to cry at the end of most days. sad

The whole paperwork and planning side of it sounds crap. My mum hated it when she was teaching. Actually, i think she did cry on occasion, but not because of the children. There was also a head at one point who was a total bitch.

Yorkstar Mon 08-Oct-12 08:00:58

I teach secondary - I love being I the classroom actually teaching. It's all the other crap that comes with it. Ofstead constantly changing their goal posts, the inconsistency of exam boards, the parents who are rude, the pupils who feel it's your job and you owe them something. The endless tasks of completing/updating data, figures and targets about this years projected targets. I love teaching but I often feel it comes secondary to everything else the schools expect of us.
I have worked nearly every night since starting back in sept. I have worked all weekend when I should be spending time with my little family. I cried yesterday when thinking about everything else I have to do. My husband is concerned about me. I love teaching but cannot do this job forever feeling like this sad

LesleyPumpshaft Mon 08-Oct-12 07:50:20

They certainly are amazing. As I said before, most of them have nerves of steel. Fwiw I was lucky to have had some amazing teachers at secondary school. They were generally the ones who you could talk to and have a laugh with. If you over stepped the boundaries heads would roll.

Alligatorpie Mon 08-Oct-12 07:44:39

I teach primary, really enjoy it although there has been the odd day in my career when I have gone Home and cried. But that is mostly due to parents - not the kids! I also did my teacher training at 37, after being successful in the counseling field.

I could not teach secondary. They are the amazing teachers!

LesleyPumpshaft Mon 08-Oct-12 07:42:37

Posting that stuff on Facebook is a really silly thing to do! Sorry, but people have to be careful with social media.

Fishwife1949 Mon 08-Oct-12 07:38:49

LesleyPumpshaft my husbands cousin teahers business studys and he heates chikdren put it this was we have a child and we dont trust him with them

He wont even work full time he hates it so much he temps in diffrent schools
I feel so sorry for the chikdren in comes in contact with

Hes a really nice guy but SHOULD not be working with chikdren in any shape or form you should see what he writes about his students on facebook

EvilTwins Mon 08-Oct-12 07:35:04

I teach secondary. I don't generally find it that stressful. Busy, yes, but I don't remember the last time I felt so stressed I wanted to cry. It's tiring, and the workload is large if you want to do a good job, but I love it. Last week, I didn't manage to eat my lunch before the end of the school day at all because I was doing auditions for the school play and then having go to straight to my lesson. I spent the whole week grinning madly- tbh I find my job quite exhilarating most of the time. If I didn't, I wouldn't do it. I have colleagues who seem to be on the edge of breaking down a lot. I think they're either in the wrong school, or in the wrong job. No one should allow their job to have that much of a negative impact on their life.

LesleyPumpshaft Mon 08-Oct-12 07:27:19

Aha, I read it as year 11 subjects! Oh, and parents always want to speak to the teacher.

noblegiraffe, glad you don't get told to fuck off!

WofflingOn Mon 08-Oct-12 07:22:28

Oh. 11 in my post referred to the number of subjects a primary teacher is expected to cover.

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