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to have said something to this man at the pool about his baby? Or should I have said something earlier?

(214 Posts)
TickledOnion Sun 07-Oct-12 20:21:39

At DD1's swimming lesson today, a man got into the public bit of the pool with a 7 week old baby in just a swim nappy. The pool is at a private gym and quite a pleasant temperature for adults but too cold for an almost naked baby. I take DD2, 8mo, swimming there with a swim nappy, swim pants and a wet suit. (Possibly overkill, but she seems quite happy).

I was really unsure whether to say anything and asked another mum who agreed with me but also didn't say anything. They stayed in for about 10 minutes and then I saw them again in the family changing room. At this point I mentioned to the man that you can buy wetsuits for babies as it can be quite cold in the pool. He said he didn't know and asked where he could get one.

Should I have said something earlier? Or nothing at all? The baby didn't seem unhappy and luckily the man took my comments as well meaning advice rather than criticism. More a WWYD than AIBU?

BornToFolk Sun 07-Oct-12 20:32:14

I took DS swimming from 4 months in only a swimming nappy. It was a council run pool too.
I always thought that if DS appeared to be cold, I'd see about getting him a wetsuit but he always seemed happy enough so I never bothered.

They were only in the pool 10 mins and the baby was happy. None of your business.

EasilyBored Sun 07-Oct-12 20:32:19

Regardless of the temperature, shouldn't it have a neoprene overnappy on, rather than just the swim nappy? We've been to a couple of different pool and they all require you to have an overnappy, or at least two layers between baby bum and the water.

I bought a wetsuit thing for DS, but he prefers to just be in the swim nappy and over nappy bit. Think the wetsuits restrict their movement a bit.

I think you are bit UR.

RillaBlythe Sun 07-Oct-12 20:32:32

ivorhugh, your post made me sad! In this scenario, the parent WASN'T doing it wrong. His child was not in any danger & was content. So if this had been you, you would have felt unnecessarily undermined.

BrianButterfield Sun 07-Oct-12 20:32:36

DS went swimming at 7 weeks in just a swim nappy and little trunks. He was fine with a towel ready next to the pool to whisk him into. They let you know if they're not happy!

Kingcyrolophosarus Sun 07-Oct-12 20:33:03

Nah , myob

DawnOfTheDee Sun 07-Oct-12 20:33:12

I think YANBU. It sounds like you were passing on a 'tip' and seems he took it that way too.

Coprolite Sun 07-Oct-12 20:34:49

I have to say that I agree with TheDetective and I reckon you got a very polite response given the uneccessary and uncalled for interference.

RunnerHasbeen Sun 07-Oct-12 20:34:50

Everybody is fine, I would only have said something sooner if the baby had been distressed, which it doesn't sound like it was. Can't really see the issue TBH, although I don't think it was very nice to discuss it with the other mum like that. What would I have done, if I noticed? Probably gone up and asked how old, so cute, first time in the pool etc, general baby chat with the dad and if, and only if, baby was visibly unhappy I would say that DD had been the same, happier in wetsuit, not to worry or something. I wouldn't go out my way to correct him as don't think he did anything particularly bad.

TickledOnion Sun 07-Oct-12 20:34:52

Lots of responses.

Other mum overheard the man say that baby was 7 weeks old.

Fair enough that people think IABU. You are probably right about 10 mins in an indoor pool not doing any harm and that I am overreacting. You've actually made me feel better as I was genuinly worried about the baby, so I'm glad that people don't think there was any harm done.

alphabite Sun 07-Oct-12 20:35:28

Seriously? Kids don't need a blinkin wetsuit fgs. It won't do a baby any harm to just be in a swim nappy. Not your concern.

ravenAK Sun 07-Oct-12 20:35:34

No harm done if he didn't take offence, but I think I would have assumed that a cold baby would be a yowling baby & left him to it.

Bigwheel Sun 07-Oct-12 20:36:11

Yabu, I wonder what parents did before wet suits etc ......

BarredfromhavingStella Sun 07-Oct-12 20:36:14

The baby was fine, you should have minded your own. What would you do if someone came over to you & advised that you were ott with swim nappy, swim pants & a 'wet suit' hmm

BTW a wet suit takes in water & holds it there & then your body temp heats it up a bit so you have warmish water against your skin-is that really what your baby is wearing or is it just a long sleeve/leg swimsuit?

gordyslovesheep Sun 07-Oct-12 20:36:42

why on earth would you be worried about a baby that was perfectly happy and not distressed in any way ...

crypes Sun 07-Oct-12 20:37:37

yanbu and when you have a baby of your own you feel so.much more protective. Years, ago when my baby was, tiny I used to see a dad with a baby in a sling in middle of winter with baby with just babygro o' and no hat. I felt so worried, about that baby so I told a. elderly neighbour who then had a word with him becos I was too cowardly.

SomersetONeil Sun 07-Oct-12 20:38:01

Come on - as a Mum, you surely know that a 7-week old baby will TELL you in no uncertain terms if it's not happy! grin

I'm sorry, but I would've thought you were a busy-body if you'd said it to me when my baby was clearly fine.

TickledOnion Sun 07-Oct-12 20:38:27

My baby wears this sort of thing wetsuit
I think it really does keep her warm, though it is quite restrictive. Might try her without it in future.

IvorHughJackolantern Sun 07-Oct-12 20:39:04

RillaBlythe - I have since realised this from all of the 'wetsuits? hmm' comments! grin

OP, apparently wetsuits are not necessary. In which case YABU <easily swayed> - but I still think you sounded like you did it nicely, not snidey-like.

DelhiCalling Sun 07-Oct-12 20:39:38

Yanbu, you did the right thing.

TickledOnion Sun 07-Oct-12 20:39:48

Think the concensus is that IWBU. Luckily the man took it well.

Think I'll slink back off to Chat now. You are a scary lot wink

LucieMay Sun 07-Oct-12 20:43:36

I find is amusing that some people observe other people's children this closely. I don't really take that much notice unless they're screaming or something.

Greythorne Sun 07-Oct-12 20:44:07

I think you are very unreasonable...but very sweet and thoughtful. No harm in being a bit concerned about a baby's safety.

I work on the principle that babies have brilliant alarm systems for letting their carers know when something is up. Cold, hot, hungry, thirtsy, tired, fed up, lonely. A gurgling, smiley, quiet baby is probably OK.

TessCowDirect Sun 07-Oct-12 20:44:28

Are babies not waterproof any more?


cbeebiesatemybrain Sun 07-Oct-12 20:45:37

I took both of mine swimming in just a swim nappy from about 8 weeks, they both lived to tell the tale. 10 minutes is really not very long anyway, we would usually stay for at least 20 minutes until dc started getting cold.

TickledOnion Sun 07-Oct-12 20:46:00

Thank you Greythorne - I've never been called unreasonable in such a nice way. smile.

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