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365 days lost to porn

(51 Posts)
M1975 Fri 05-Oct-12 21:49:37

new here need advice

my hubbie (4 years married) and i have been trying for a baby for over a year now. when it first started we had sex all the time, but recently its becoming more and more less frequent.

last week whilst cleaning up the house, i stepped in some ooze, and first i thought the dog had been sick, but it seems to be semen, i have noticed the tv sometimes is on strange channels when i turn on the tv to do the laundry, i just thought nothing of it. He has been going to bed later and later after me.

What should i do, i have hard enough time getting through the days knowing that having our own child is looking less and less likely but now he is putting potential seeds out over some strange dirty tv shows which show silly looking girls grinding pillows.

should i confront or try and catch him in it ?

FutTheShuckUp Fri 05-Oct-12 21:49:58

grin

cerealqueen Fri 05-Oct-12 21:51:52

Relationships Thread might be your best bet for some proper advice?

WorraLiberty Fri 05-Oct-12 21:55:02

Blimey I read the title and thought that's a hell of a long film!

OP, I think you need to ask him why he's wanking instead of having sex with you when you're both supposed to be TTC.

Are you sure he really wants a baby?

MrsKeithRichards Fri 05-Oct-12 21:55:13

Talk to him. He's allowed to masturbate, that's not the issue. Leaving a mess behind is fucking rank.

Have you seen the gp?

Fakebook Fri 05-Oct-12 21:58:48

OP, I think you need to ask him why he's wanking instead of having sex with you when you're both supposed to be TTC.

Erm, no?! She needs to ask him why the hell he's masturbating and leaving his love juice all over the floor!! What the heck are tissues for?

M1975 Fri 05-Oct-12 22:07:30

We went and saw my doctor, they ran tests on me, that could not find anything to be wrong.

He went to his doctor and he says all his tests came back ok.

So we had been trying on a regular basis, it seemed ok. But I am worried we wont ever have children now, and if he is masturbating, we will have less of a chance.

is it possible he see's me as broken or i have been trying to hard , to much pressure. I dont understand why he would do that over a woman on tv when i can do the same for him, surely thats better than doing it yourself?

I thought if I caught him, he could not deny it, the more i think about it the more i believe thats what he is doing, i havent actually caught him yet, but adding in the tv,mess on the floor, and him staying up always 15 mins after ive gone to bed, and i have noticed that the tissue box is going down very quickly.

If i speak to him, he will deny it.

TiggyD Fri 05-Oct-12 22:10:31

Did he watch There's Something About Mary in 3D?

M1975 Fri 05-Oct-12 22:11:35

what ?

Fakebook Fri 05-Oct-12 22:12:22

15 mins? Poor you. wink

WorraLiberty Fri 05-Oct-12 22:13:13

Well indeed, that too Fakebook....

MadgeHarvey Fri 05-Oct-12 22:14:45

I was sure full moon was a couple of days ago? Too cloudy here to check - anyone?

<<<sings (to tune of Murder on the Dance Floor) there's jizz on the living room............>>>

I'll get me coat. grin

HolyAutumnGoldBatman Fri 05-Oct-12 22:17:16

Has this got anything to do with Sharon?

I miss those threads.

MadgeHarvey Fri 05-Oct-12 22:18:13

Wasn't it wine with Sharon? Maybe she's graduated to man-fat but it's a big leap...... grin

WorraLiberty Fri 05-Oct-12 22:18:38

Madge you've been watching Come Dancing, haven't you? grin

TiggyD Fri 05-Oct-12 22:19:28

I think the fact you're asking us tells us you could use some better and more direct communication between the 2 of you.

Does he want children?
Does he want to have horizontal relations with you?
Too much pressure on him?

HoopDePoop Fri 05-Oct-12 22:20:20

Lol at tissue box grin

M1975 Fri 05-Oct-12 22:20:24

what are you on about ?

GrimAndHumourless Fri 05-Oct-12 22:21:22

he needs a wank sock, much tidier

HTH

M1975 Fri 05-Oct-12 22:25:15

Hi tiggyd

Communication could always be better, if i can pull him from the tv or his games. He says he wants children, we discussed it lots before the issues started and he even supported me more at the start of the frustrations
we would have sex 4 or 5 times a week, last time we had sex was 2 weeks ago, i was going through my cycle but he hasnt even touched me since that ended, almost 2 weeks ago.
As for pressure, could be wanting sex all the time for the sake of children be causing pressure on him, making him feel like a failure. I have gotten to the point where i am willing to degrade myself and do things to get him interested in trying for a baby again, we are very basic in that department, but he has made suggestive comments about other things which i had previously ruled out.

mamamibbo Fri 05-Oct-12 22:25:16

this threads made me feel a bit queasy... how long would he have to wank for to leace so much 'ooze'

on a side note.. some times theres nothing wrong with either of the couple but they are just not compatible in that way, i tried for a baby with my ex for 7 years and didnt get pregnant, all tests were clear, i split up with him and went on the pill when i got with now dh and got pregnant! we are very compatible and now have had 3 babies in 3 years lol

Fakebook Fri 05-Oct-12 22:25:24

Perhaps his mum could knit him one grin

AgentZigzag Fri 05-Oct-12 22:25:50

Just tell him what you 'found' and have noticed about the 15 mins later to bed/tissue box.

I'm not sure you can stop him as such, he's doing it in private and I wouldn't be too happy with someone telling me when/where I can do Such Things (not that they'd have cause to, like).

Would you really be happy catching him in the act? Wouldn't that be cause for a bit of an awkward atmosphere?

WorraLiberty Fri 05-Oct-12 22:26:51

What do you mean by 'degrade' yourself?

TiggyD Fri 05-Oct-12 22:30:46

I'm sure sex with you would be more interesting than a game on an X box. Next time he starts playing Call of Duty put something sexy on and pull him off.

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