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AIBU?

To think this rape poster is giving out the wrong message?

96 replies

slatternlymother · 04/10/2012 17:51

I am in am the services. I was at the sickbay this morning, when I saw some of their new campaign posters on rape and violent crime.

The poster on rape says 'one third of rapes are alcohol related. Don't be a victim' with a photo underneath of a woman wearing a small vest top, lying on the floor, crying.

AIBU to think this gives out the message that if you drink, you're making yourself a victim? Surely a woman should be able to consume alcohol without fear of becoming a rape victim? Surely the message should be; 'Dont rape people'?

It's been on my mind all day. AIBU?

OP posts:

Report

WorraLiberty · 04/10/2012 17:53

I thought they did away with those posters after the outcry?

slatternlymother · 04/10/2012 17:54

This is the services, so possibly a bit behind the times. I didn't know whether I was being silly for thinking like this, or if I should speak to the warrant officer in charge and ask him to take them down?

OP posts:

WorraLiberty · 04/10/2012 17:55

And I think it gives out the message that if you get drunk, you often make silly decisions you wouldn't have made when sober.

That's not to say anyone but the rapist is to blame for the rape...but I think it can be a timely reminder for people to drink within their limits.

GhouliaYelps · 04/10/2012 17:56

You are in no way being silly in your response. That poster is perpetuating a horrible myth and victim-blaming.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 04/10/2012 17:56

Well, I do believe that drinking to excess can put one at greater risk of being the victim of crime, no matter what your gender, and I also believe that people do have to take reasonable steps to ensure their own safety, BUT I also believe that the only person responsible for a rape, is the rapist.

WorraLiberty · 04/10/2012 17:58

Precisely SDTG

DowagersHump · 04/10/2012 17:59

I agree with you OP. It's entirely putting the blame on the victim's shoulders.

I've been raped sober and raped while drunk. I don't think my sobriety had much of an impact on the rapists tbh - they didn't really care either way.

And worra - what do you mean by 'silly decisions'? The 'silly decision' to be in the same place as a rapist?

WanderingWhistle · 04/10/2012 18:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

susiedaisy · 04/10/2012 18:00

Wasn't there another poster aimed at boys/men that came out at the same time, I can't quite remember but I thought there was!

OldLadyKnowsNothing · 04/10/2012 18:01

www.thisisnotaninvitationtorapeme.co.uk/

www.wecanstopit.co.uk/

WorraLiberty · 04/10/2012 18:08

And worra - what do you mean by 'silly decisions'? The 'silly decision' to be in the same place as a rapist?

No

I think it's quite clear what I meant by my post.

I made the silly decision once to run across a busy high road to catch a bus and came within an inch of being run over by it.

People make decisions when drunk and often wake up the next morning worried about how silly they were and how lucky they were that those decisions didn't result in something horrible happening to them....whether that's getting run over, getting raped/getting beaten up/getting mugged etc....

The perpetrator of the crime is always to blame and not the victim - however victims will often regret the alcohol fuelled decisions they made, leading up to the crime.

This poster is a badly worded reminder of that.

Celticlassie · 04/10/2012 18:13

I thought these 'this is not an invitation' posters were excellent, oldlady, especially the beautiful wedding photo one. Very hard hitting and give completely the right message - the victim is NEVER to blame.

Melpomene · 04/10/2012 18:14

I wonder what that statistic 'one third of rapes are alcohol related' means, anyway? Do they keep records of the victims' blood alcohol levels?

SoleSource · 04/10/2012 18:16

I agree with Worra.

slatternlymother · 04/10/2012 18:44

I just felt it was poorly worded. Like somehow, if you drink it's kind of your fault if you get raped because you put yourself in that situation.

Should I ask them to take the posters down, in favour of the linked ones above?

OP posts:

MrsTerryPratchett · 04/10/2012 18:53

I think the two worrying things it suggests are that women are responsible for rape and that rape is about poor decision making and drink and where you are and what you wear.

Rape is a violent crime. I personally haven't seen any posters blaming stabbings/muggings on the victims blood alcohol level.

Acumens100 · 04/10/2012 18:56

What I find so weirdly unspoken about those kinds of messages is that it doesn't stop rape. It might stop rape happening to you, but it's not going to stop the rapist raping. It's rape deflection, not . It's still gonna happen, but just to some other poor sod. And with a side helping of implying it's their fault.

I don't really see how this is a general social improvement. It's just redistributing the horror, not really dealing with it at all.

Acumens100 · 04/10/2012 18:56

*not prevention

MrsTerryPratchett · 04/10/2012 18:58

That is another point I wanted to make, Acumens100 thanks for making it. If we really wanted women to stop getting raped by these helpful 'suggestions' a more useful one would be; never have a relationship or get married.

Grumpla · 04/10/2012 19:02

Rape is caused by rapists. Not booze, not clothes, not "asking for it". Rapists. EVERY TIME.
I would definitely ask them to take the poster down.

catgirl1976 · 04/10/2012 19:02

What Worra and STDG said

The posters are badly worded and the only person who ever has any responsibilty for a rape is the rapist

Being drunk does put your more at risk of many things like getting run over, falling over, choking on your own vomit etc, but a message on drinking responsibly should not be mixed up with a rape message - 2 separate issues and when combined seems victim blamey

MrsTerryPratchett · 04/10/2012 19:09

Why can't they have drunk and stupid prevention posters then? Because it always seems to come up in relation to rape, not falling down, not being run over, not being stabbed or shot.

I think this stuff all gets muddled up. I might regret getting drunk and shagging someone if I fumbled the condom or shagged someone I wouldn't normally have. That is so far removed from rape as to be unrelated. I met my DH in a bar, we both drank. Luckily he was a lovely man and not a rapist. Should I have been thinking about that? Not unless I think about it every time I talk to any man.

MrsTerryPratchett · 04/10/2012 19:11

And, i don't mean to sound flippant, just trying to follow the logic... if 1/3 of rapes are alcohol related (on the part of the victim, not specified?) and 2/3 are not, surely being drunk prevents you from being raped. That's plainly bollocks so why even mention drinking? 3/3 rapes are rapist related.

LesleyPumpshaft · 04/10/2012 19:20

The onus should only be on men not raping, instead of women modifying their behaviour. Everyone should have the right to have a good night out and get a bit pissed without being raped. The arse-witted poster makes me feel quite angry.

Are there plans for a poster campaign to stop women from dancing, laughing and getting dressed up for the night too?

catgirl1976 · 04/10/2012 19:21

There was a drunk and stupid tv campaign a while ago - with that guy climbing a building to get a girls balloon as they drink made him feel like a super hero

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