to get cross when people presume you want to share your Hs hobby

[BonnyDay]

h does outward boundy type hobby.
am sick to the teeth of people asking me if I do it too - or will take it up.

ER NO?
why is this?

[squeakytoy]

It is only a polite question.. they are not saying you "should" be doing it are they?

Do you not like making conversation with people??

[fuckadoodlepoopoo]

What the hell? Its just a question! You clearly have a chip about it for some reason.

[slowestwildebeast]

Thosr chumps! How dare they! :)

[BonnyDay]

oh wow!
OH no its a regular thing and after a year or so. then they ask YOU what you do similarly.

very annoying.

[Llanbobl]

Oh 'eck if that is all you have to worry about..........

It is just small talk, a way of breaking the ice and finding out a bit about you, a social nicety. How hard is it to say no you don't share that particular hobby and that you pursue [insert hobby] instead?

[ZZZenAgain]

I see what you mean, you are not an extension of him. If you told everyone you had taken up crochet, no one would ask him if he were doing it too, even if you did it all weekend and set up your own business selling the things you made.

[WorraLiberty]

Leave the polite bastards!

[BonnyDay]

ok ok ok! I SURRENDER

i just thought it was possibly something someone else somewhere in the world might hate.


slinks off

[BonnyDay]

thanks zzzzen

[noddyholder]

My dp is upstairs as we type 'putting down the bass' on yet another track from his concept album He needs a backing singer everyone always turns to look at me! F off Sonny and bloody cher we aint

[BonnyDay]

lol

yes i will make H come to aerobics/whatever too

[noddyholder]

I am endlessly fascinated/impressed when dp produces a track I don't want to know how he does it

[MrsHoarder]

Nothing wrong with asking! Especially if its a good "family" type activity. In the early stages of our relationship DH started 2 of my hobbies, and I started one of his. Because we have fairly compatible tastes and wanted to spend more time together (note: we were infatuated teenagers at the time). This will be even better when DS gets beyond the rolling around on the floor stage: they are all very good things to take children to.

We have other hobbies that each other go nowhere near though. He knows better than to even touch my piano So people who ask are making polite conversation not trying to force you into it (unless they are my mother )

[Trills]

Is it as annoying as people thinking that you must be interested in the sports that your children do? (instead of just about putting up with it)

[BonnyDay]

good point trills

[slowestwildebeast]

Maybe they're joking, as in taking the piss.

I get this off my friends who do loads of sport.

Friend A. "I'm doing bootcamp now"
Friend B. "Slowest do you not fancy bootcamp?"
Friend A & B fall about laughing at me doing anything sporty

The rude cows.
Maybe yanbu after all.

[Littleprincessrocks]

No one ever asks DH if he likes cross stitch or card making. But then again no one asks if I will join DH in building the campervan.
Maybe our hobbies are too stereotyped genderwise? lol

But I wouldn't take offence if they did ask, esspecially if it was a hobby that is veiwed as more gender neutral - like walking/ cycling etc.

[carabos]

DH and I share a hobby - or rather, my hobby is his work. People ask us all the time if the DSs do it as well. It's just small talk.

[Birdsgottafly]

I'm the opposite, it annoys me when people assume that i don't know as much about Sea Fishing as my DP.

I am not as good at it as he is, but as good as most men.

The same applies to dog breeding/ and most outdoor stuff, etc.

the last time we camped,i was looked at in amazement by the other women when i was co-ordinating the pitching of three tents.

[FutureNannyOgg]

My DH joined in my bellydance practice the other night, he is not the epitome of grace... He wanted to do more stuff together .

He always tries to get me to come and spectate at his hobbies, I hate it, because it's not the sort of thing I would choose to do if I had the option, but I do feel like I should be supportive even though I never ask him to do the same

[geegee888]

I do running, and a lot the couples both do it, so YANBU. Its pretty normal I think to share interests. In actual fact, some of the men whose partners don't do it and who seem to think that sport is for men piss me off.

[AlwaysOneMissing]

Hmmm, I do get your annoyance. I think it's the assumption that you should dutifully follow and get involved with anything your DH decides to take an interest in.

My DH has a time consuming hobby (often involving weekends away doing his hobby). My DInlaws seem to think that I am an unsupportive wife for not dragging myself and our two DC around after him! It is a solitary hobby really, not social at all, and I can think of much better things to do with my time than wait dutifully for him to come back to the hotel at the end of the day!
It's the assumption that my DHs likes are obviously more important than my own. (I find it sexist).