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To put my toddler in nursery because I hate playing with him?

(13 Posts)
TooManyKidsNotEnoughTime Sat 29-Sep-12 21:04:41

He is 2.2 and is my 4th. I am so done with trying to keep him occupied! I try to take him to a Surestart group most days. I try to play with his toys with him but he would rather watch TV (non-stop bloody Ben & Holly, albeit an improvement on Peppa). He does'nt want to read books or draw, he points to the computer and tells me to 'sit 'puter' in other words leave me alone! I hate taking him to the park because he doesn't want to play on the toddler equipment or swings. He wants to go on the big kid climbing frames and slides and I have to hang onto him in case he falls and of course he screams for me to 'go wayyy'. If we go for a walk, he wants to constantly run and will not hold hands, reins trigger a meltdown. In the pushchair, he will do his 'houdini' act and start to leap out of it. If I put some music onto dance with him, I am told to 'go wayyy'. I can never get anything done either because he is everywhere and I have to constantly watch him as he delights in playing with plugs or anything electrical/dangerous.

He will go to nursery 4 afternoons a week. It will take the pressure of me to do 'stuff' with him and I can at least do the shopping and housework in peace! We will still go to Surestart a few mornings a week. I hate the fact that I am not enjoying my time with him as I imagined when I was pregnant that it would be lovely doing stuff with him when the other Dcs were at school.

I feel quite guilty about it - should I?

Gimblinginthewabe Sat 29-Sep-12 21:07:04

I think it sounds like nursery would be very good for him, he can burn off his energy in a safe environment and then come back nice and tired. You can get some stuff done which will make you feel more relaxed and then the time you spend with him will be more pleasant and constructive.

suebfg Sat 29-Sep-12 21:08:07

I think the headline of your thread is unreasonable 'hate playing with him' but the content of the thread isn't unreasonable. I think it's hard work to keep them occupied.

squeakytoy Sat 29-Sep-12 21:09:02

Dont feel guilty, it sounds like he does need so socialise with others and learn that he cant be as independent as he would like to be just yet!

AgentZigzag Sat 29-Sep-12 21:10:32

They get to the point when you know they're ready to experience more than you can give them on your own.

My nearly 3 YO is just about there grin

Not sure why you're feeling guilty because he's not fussed about you playing with him when you don't really want to anyway.

Or is it because he could be your last baby and you wanted to savour it (making a huge assumption there)

He sounds a happy little soul anyway smile

TooManyKidsNotEnoughTime Sat 29-Sep-12 21:12:08

suebfg you are right, I apologise. i don't hate playing with him in the few split seconds he will play with toys but I am starting to hate stressing about what I can do with him to keep him away from the TV.

TooManyKidsNotEnoughTime Sat 29-Sep-12 21:14:32

AgentZigZag very perceptive! I did have him with the emphasis on him being my last and intending to enjoy it and I have, much more than with the others because I have been aware of that. Not enjoying this stage though at all.

suebfg Sat 29-Sep-12 21:15:17

Does he like looking for bugs etc? One of the best groups I took DS to was in the forest and they made bug hotels, had marshmallows over a fire, built dens etc.

Pavlovthecat Sat 29-Sep-12 21:15:45

Agree with another poster your title is wrong. It sounds like you don't hate playing with him rather really want to, but he wants to be 'independent'. DD was just like that, she went to nursery at 12mths due to work commitments, for 1.5 days a week and it was the best thing for her.

Don't feel guilty, you will feel like a better parent when he has outside influences, he is ready. And it sounds like you are too. You will enjoy your time with him much more if he goes to nursery for a little bit each week.

I think I would also struggle with his strong need for independance.

I dont think you should feel guilty at all. Its like a constant rejection from him when you are trying so hard and hes telling you to go away.

Agree that the "hate playing with him" was a bit harsh though.

SomeoneThatYouUsedToKnow Sat 29-Sep-12 21:21:13

Sounds like a good plan for him and you. Do not feel any guilt about this, you sound like a great DM.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

WorraLiberty Sat 29-Sep-12 21:23:25

It sounds like it will do him and you the world of good.

Regarding the TV...how did he manage to get so addicted to it?

YABU to no switch it off when you don't want him watching it. He'll tantrum at first but he'll eventually learn that no means no.

iloveberries Sat 29-Sep-12 21:25:05

Sounds like he'd enjoy nursery more and it'd be more stimulating for him so no, yanbu

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