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To be incensed that a drunk mother is collecting her kids by car and not being stopped from hurting herself or other innocent children?

(74 Posts)
PantiesInABunch Fri 28-Sep-12 16:23:45

My child catches the school bus to his primary school.

On occasion when I'm able to leave work early I collect him.

I met up with an old friend whose child also attends the school and we were talking and she was upset that yesterday she'd approached the headmaster because another mum was so pissed that she couldn't walk properly down the road and then she promtly got in her 4x4 and raced down the road, drunk.

The head said that there was nothing they could do? WTF?

My friend and another mum who joined us confirmed she was "stinking" of booze and wobbly down the lane.

I was baffled and asked why nobody said anything to her, or why not just call the police.

I'd be wracked with guilt if she knocked down and killed a person whilst drunk in charge.

I have name changed because I dont want to be identified. If I called the police anonymously to tell them there's a parent doing this- do you think they'd go down a couple of afternoons to see if she does this again? Ive been told it's not every day.

Another parent had also told us that he'd stopped to help her during the summer holiday because she'd crashed into a tree (smelling like booze)and wrecked her car but wouldn't accept his help and she didn't want the police involved (she'd told the dad who stopped to help that a taxi cab had run her off the road)

It's really awful if the lady is having problems but surely it's best- someone says somthing? If I wrote to the school surely they have to do something?

MumsGoToReykjavik Fri 28-Sep-12 16:27:01

Call the police. No question no hesitations. Do it.

BorisJohnsonsHair Fri 28-Sep-12 16:27:42

I don't think it's up to the school, but it is a matter for the police. I have a "friend" who does much the same, although has given up her car at the moment thankfully. I would have no hesitation in reporting her; a visit from police/social services may be enough to stop her driving. She obviously needs help though.

WilsonFrickett Fri 28-Sep-12 16:28:51

Call the police and tell your friend to call the police rather than the HT the next time she does it. There is nothing the school can do unless a staff member personally witnesses it - they can't phone the police and say 'Mrs X says Mrs Y was drunk today.' Mrs X should just pick up the phone and dial 999.

PantiesInABunch Fri 28-Sep-12 16:29:22

Yes, I do feel terribly sorry for her. This is shadowed by my wanting to protect my own child though.

I am shocked the school haven't said anything, knowing full well she's come in a car and leaves in it.

sweetkitty Fri 28-Sep-12 16:30:17

Oh I would call the police straight away if I even suspected someone was drink driving.

PantiesInABunch Fri 28-Sep-12 16:30:51

Wilson- she told the head and he said "yes we know- there's nothing we are able to do" following my friend saying she suspected a parent was inebriated and couldn't talk or focus properly shock

WilsonFrickett Fri 28-Sep-12 16:30:53

I don't mean to take a pop at you Panties but why should it be up to the school? Just phone the police.

WilsonFrickett Fri 28-Sep-12 16:31:09

X post

sookiesookie Fri 28-Sep-12 16:31:17

Report it yourself and tell you friend the school is correct. They didn't see it so should not get involved. What if your friend is just causing trouble and the school end up in the middle.
Your friend is unreasonable for moaning to the school but not doing anything.

Pooka Fri 28-Sep-12 16:32:50

I disagree with the head teacher, in tht the school are releasing children from their care to that of smene who is drunk. I think this is a child protection issue and they should be investigating/referring

If they are unwilling to intercede I would certainly contact the police, preferably with car make, model and registration.

StellaAndFries Fri 28-Sep-12 16:32:56

My sil turned up to school drunk a few weeks ago (5x the limit so not just tipsy) and even though she'd walked the school called SS as she was in no fit state to parent.

WorraLiberty Fri 28-Sep-12 16:33:43

What do you expect the school to do if the people who are actually witnessing this can't be arsed to call the Police?

The Head can hardly ring them and say someone said to someone else and it finally got back to him/her that someone's pissed and in charge of a child and a car.

They need to report what they're actually seeing.

I witnessed a little girl's Grandad turning up to school pissed as a fart to pick her up and I went straight in and told the little girl's teacher.

She agreed he was too drunk to be in charge and so refused to release her into his care. But if I hadn't reported it, she probably wouldn't have noticed.

comedycentral Fri 28-Sep-12 16:36:44

Phone the police every day to report her if needs be.

MrSunshine Fri 28-Sep-12 16:36:49

The headteacher can't do anything , the police can. Why did your friend not call them? confused

PantiesInABunch Fri 28-Sep-12 16:41:48

Mr Sunshine, because she is clearly a chinless bollock. Sorry. I asked the same thing and she grimaced and shrugged her shoulders.

Hulababy Fri 28-Sep-12 16:44:51

This is a primary school yes?
The school CAN do something. The school can prevent the child leaving with her and call the police. We have staff policies on the way to address such matters and we are all expected to carry them out.
We will not send a child home with an adult who is drunk. It is a child protection issue.

PantiesInABunch Fri 28-Sep-12 16:45:25

I'm not sure I 'm being clear here-
The mother had to collect her 2 children from 2 different classes, one of the classes the head teaches in part of the week. He knows she was drunk he said he knew but couldn't do anything about it.

Surely he should not have let the children go with her?

I'm going to call the crimestoppers i think- but thanks I will take down her new car number, model and make.

PantiesInABunch Fri 28-Sep-12 16:45:59

thank you Hulababy.

sugarice Fri 28-Sep-12 16:46:37

Personally I think the school do have a moral responsibility to investigate that kind of claim where their pupils are concerned. How hard would it be to check on the Mother's condition in the morning or afternoon pick up.

Yes to the Police being informed too.

Hulababy Fri 28-Sep-12 16:46:40

The school can address even if it is hearsay. The do not release the child until the parent turns up. They then see for themselves. The school CAN do this and ask for the parent to come over.

WorraLiberty Fri 28-Sep-12 16:46:50

Mr Sunshine, because she is clearly a chinless bollock

I just spat my tea out at that grin

The school can only prevent the child from leaving the school if they've noticed the parent is in fact drunk.

That's why they rely on parents to tell them these things.

TirednessKills Fri 28-Sep-12 16:48:19

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

70isaLimitNotaTarget Fri 28-Sep-12 16:48:55

Definately Police rather than School matter. If it took place on School Premesis they might have more power.
Maybe let the non emergency number aware so her Registration is 'logged'. They won't stop someone without suspicion and if as you say she doesn't do it every day, you would need to catch her on the day she does (IISWIM)

It's really awful if the lady's having problems
Yes, I do feel terribly sorry for her

Her problems are not your problems. Don't try to justify why she drinks&drives especially at a school site.
Her problems will be 100x worse if she kills a child.
I'm surprised no-one has wrestled her keys from her and refused to let her drive.

TirednessKills Fri 28-Sep-12 16:49:45

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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