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AIBU?

to not want to spend half the day in the AN clinic on Friday when it would have been my DD's seventh birthday that day?

203 replies

confuddledDOTcom · 25/09/2012 15:10

Really not looking forward to it! I've had the appointment a few weeks but it didn't occur to me what the date was until we were discussing plans for the weekend.

Last night I emailed the SoM who has helped me with a few things and asked if she can arrange somehow to get me pushed through because it's a high risk clinic it means a half day appointment, they're bad enough at the best of times but it's really not a day we want to be hanging around there. As it's a high risk clinic it's only held monthly as non-obstetric doctors come from another hospital.

I'm getting a little twitchy because I've had no "away" message but she's not responded yet, I'd have thought with something this sensitive she could have at least sent me a reply and said "let me see what I can do" even if she needs time to work things out. I just want to know that I'm not going to have to sit around there. OH's hoping to get out early too, even though he's coming with me, so we can take the girls to visit their sister.

So what do you think - should I just put up with three hours there on that date, am I being too twitchy about a reply?

[NOTE FROM MNHQ: Please note that we have changed the thread title of this thread - which may mean that some of the following posts do not make complete sense, as they are referring to the previous, no-longer-visible version of the title. Apologies for all the confusion, and best of luck to the OP in getting the appointment situation sorted out. Thanks, MNHQ]

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MrsCarriePooter · 25/09/2012 15:13

I think you're being too twitchy.

I'm sorry about the inconvenience but YABU: no one wants to sit there for three hours. If it wasn't one thing it would be another and not really fair on other patients, all of whom may also have reasons that they don't want to be there on that day.

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DoMeDon · 25/09/2012 15:14

YABU - a special clinic would probably not be able to accommodate birthday requests. It is not 'this sensitive' - it is a birthday, while special they are once a year not once in a lifetime.

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Melindaaa · 25/09/2012 15:15

I must be missing the point. Your daughter will be at school won't she?

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larks35 · 25/09/2012 15:19

Was going to say wouldn't you dd be at school anyway but Melindaaa beat me to it.
I think YABU to think that your DD's birthday is something your Ostetric clinic need to worry about.

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Tweasels · 25/09/2012 15:20

What exactly is the problem? Your daughter will be in school anyway won't she? And, can you not just do whatever you were planning after the hospital appointment?

Apologies if I've missed the point.

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Finallygotaroundtoit · 25/09/2012 15:25

Not sure who it is you emailed but they may be taken aback by your request.

How would they let you be seen quicker? Presumably by making some other woman also with a high risk pregnancy wait even longer Hmm

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RillaBlythe · 25/09/2012 15:27

I don't get the problem with it being on your daughter's birthday as she will be in school until 3. No?

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LadyMargolotta · 25/09/2012 15:28

I'm confused as well. I assume she'll be at school.

I had to work on my dd's birthday, until 10pm, so didn't see her all day. We just celebrated it another time.

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Lueji · 25/09/2012 15:31

My DS has always had a brief thing on the evening of his birthday, and then his party at the weekend.

I'm sure your DD will be fine.

It's only a birthday.

A bit like people taking the day off for their birthdays, or even children.

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DoMeDon · 25/09/2012 15:35

i don't think there's anything wrong with taking a day off if you can and want to though.

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Bintang · 25/09/2012 15:36

Sorry- I don't know what an SoM is!

Was going to say a) isn't DD in school? Maybe she's He'd though...
B) why are you taking your girls to visit their sister (DD7?)

Think I've missed another thread perhaps? Confused

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Mrsjay · 25/09/2012 15:37

YABU your daughter will be in school your pregnnacy is far more important than your DDs 7th birthday she will be fine, I was in hospital for many weeks and didn't see a lot of dd1 just visiting times, it is just 1 of those things im afraid,

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RillaBlythe · 25/09/2012 15:37

What if they cancelled the clinic because it was the doctor's daughter's birthday & they wanted to take the day off to spend with them?

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Mrsjay · 25/09/2012 15:39

A birthday isn't a sensitive family emergency though and this is a once a month clinic so I am guessing other high risk pregnant women will have their appointment slots,

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BonaDea · 25/09/2012 15:49

I totally get the frustration with high risk clinics though. Okay, I'm high risk and am grateful for the extra care and attention I get.

But seriously, why can't I get an appointment time like any other NHS clinic or appointment I've ever been to? Effectively, you have to show up and just wait around for an entire morning. Be grateful you only do it every month, I do it every fortnight.

So, I actually think it is ENTIRELY possible for just this once for them to put you to the front of the queue. Every other time you go, you wait patiently while they, without rhyme nor reason, and without reference to arrival time, see people willy nilly.

Bloody hell (you can tell I went there this morning and waited for 2.5 hours, for 0.5 hours of medical attention and also paid £3.30 in parking in the hospital's rip off car park).

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WorraLiberty · 25/09/2012 15:51

As others have said she'll be at school, unless the appointment runs past 3pm does it?

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Mrsjay · 25/09/2012 15:55

Bloody hell (you can tell I went there this morning and waited for 2.5 hours, for 0.5 hours of medical attention and also paid £3.30 in parking in the hospital's rip off car park).

Just relax put your feet up and have a Brew Smile

I do agree these clinics aremore stress than anything its a free for all I was the same with mine if i wasn't in hospital I was waiting at bloody clinics

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confuddledDOTcom · 25/09/2012 15:55

Sensitive as in she's dead?

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confuddledDOTcom · 25/09/2012 15:55

Which is why we're taking our children to visit her...

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Mrsjay · 25/09/2012 15:56

Sensitive as in she's dead?

Nowhere In your post did you say that anywhere how are we supposed to reply properly,

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confuddledDOTcom · 25/09/2012 15:57

So no, she's not at school, she never left the hospital. I'm sorry but when I said that he wants to get off work early so we can take our daughters to visit her I meant at the cemetery, where did everyone else think we were going?

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Mrsjay · 25/09/2012 15:59

We didn't know you didn't mention anything I am sorry this is upsetting for you but we didn't know

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WorraLiberty · 25/09/2012 16:00

where did everyone else think we were going?

Anywhere but a cemetery

How on god's earth could we have known if you didn't mention it? Confused

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Pooka · 25/09/2012 16:02

But your op didn't say anything like that. It could have been one of your other girls' birthdays? Or maybe you have a grown up daughter living away from home?

Terribly sorry. Devastating for you all. But I don't think any other the other posters can be blamed for not inferring the full situation from your op.

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LadyMargolotta · 25/09/2012 16:02

I'm very sorry but there was no hint at all that you were referring to your child who sadly passed away.

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