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DH keeps calling me 'Mom'

(49 Posts)
AugustMoon Mon 24-Sep-12 13:54:19

I said please can you not call me that, I'm 'mum' not 'mom'. He point blank refuses, says I'm trying to change him and his accent. He's South African. Big argument. I'm not trying to change him, I'm just not 'mom' and never will be.

In the grand scheme of things does it really matter?? Pick your battles wisely or get him to call you by your actual name....after all, you aren't his mom or mum so why would he call you this anyway?

MadgeHarvey Mon 24-Sep-12 13:58:24

It's what he was born and raised with. Mum is just not used over there. It doesn't change the spirit of the word - only how it's pronounced really so YABVVVU. You can't just go round changing how someone says something in the only way they've ever known.

CookingFunt Mon 24-Sep-12 13:59:03

Is he calling you 'mom' as in 'Here a cuppa for you Mom' or is it to the DC,as in 'Give this pen to your Mom' ?

SavoyCabbage Mon 24-Sep-12 13:59:13

I say Mam as I am from Newcastle and my dh says mom as he is from the US and we live in Australia where everybody says mum.

My dds call me mammy. That's my name but dh will say 'pass that to your mommy' as that's what he says. My dd's don't call me Mommy so it doesn't make any difference.

My girls will say 'my mum' to their friends but they wouldn't call me that as its not my name.

BonnyDay Mon 24-Sep-12 13:59:47

you arent his mother are you?
do you have a name?

CookingFunt Mon 24-Sep-12 13:59:59

Heres a cuppa

RightsaidFreud Mon 24-Sep-12 14:00:38

In the midlands, 'Mom' is the norm. I hate 'mum', its just not what i've grown up with. It ruddy annoying trying to find a mothers day card that doesn't say 'mum'. Come on card companies, pull your finger out!

OHforDUCKScake Mon 24-Sep-12 14:00:41

Does he have Oedipus Complex? hmm

TidyGOLDDancer Mon 24-Sep-12 14:01:28

Oh YANBU. There is a difference, it is a different word.

Tbh, I would keep correcting it every time it happens. This is not about accents. I have SA friends and they are quite capable of saying mum and not mom.

dinkystinky Mon 24-Sep-12 14:01:38

Change your title to "She who must be obeyed" - works for me wink

Anotherusefulname Mon 24-Sep-12 14:03:50

I'm Mom not Mum, I'm from the midlands and around her saying Mum sounds a bit pretentious and fake so I can understand where he is coming from with it to be honest. If of course he is only doing it when your children are around and using your name when it's just adults around.

If he calls you Mom all the time then I think the way he says it is the least of your worries.

ExitPursuedByABear Mon 24-Sep-12 14:04:25

My DH refers to me as Mum when DD is around, but when he is speaking directly to me.

I ignore him.

MadgeHarvey Mon 24-Sep-12 14:05:31

Tidy - how exactly is there a difference? I have lived in SA and here equally. I can assure that their 'mom' is the same as our 'mum'. It just is.

cozietoesie Mon 24-Sep-12 14:05:35


Get some from


CookingFunt Mon 24-Sep-12 14:05:48

If DH called me Mum/Mom/Mam/Mother instead of my name it would be very weird.

SavoyCabbage Mon 24-Sep-12 14:06:23

But if he's using it like Saran wrap/cling film then that's different from calling you Sue when your name is Bob.

AugustMoon Mon 24-Sep-12 14:07:22

cooking it's as in 'you are a mom, stop complaining' when I was saying there's so much to remember before leaving the house

AugustMoon Mon 24-Sep-12 14:12:06

He does refer to me as 'mom' too. With the DC. But im on his phone, affectionately, as mummy moon. So he knows im mum not mom and his 'mom' is saved as 'mom'. I guess the issue is more that he's refused to call me mum even though I've asked him and he knows its what i prefer.

And it's not pretentious, everyone's mum round here, it's all i've ever known so how can it be pretentious?

Ephiny Mon 24-Sep-12 14:12:13

This is just a difference in accent, surely? What a silly thing to have an argument over!

Lueji Mon 24-Sep-12 14:12:22


BonnyDay Mon 24-Sep-12 14:12:40

ew ew ew at calling you mum in a sexy way

AugustMoon Mon 24-Sep-12 14:12:57

When I say call me I mean refer to me as.

Ephiny Mon 24-Sep-12 14:13:19

(it's a bit weird that he has you listed as 'mummy' in his phone though!) confused

AugustMoon Mon 24-Sep-12 14:13:32

You see I don't think it is a difference in accent. To me it's an entirely different word.

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