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AIBU?

When your child brings home uniform that doesn't belong to them...

38 replies

AbbyRue · 21/09/2012 09:29

you would expect parents to return to right owner right, especially if its named? Oh no, not this one parent at my kids school! So a few days into the new school year, DS (9) comes home without his jumper. We search everywhere including lost property at school but with no luck. I had to fork out £30 to replace - which was painful to pay as the lost jumper was a 2nd hand bargain at £5

This morning, a boy in DS class took off his jumper and put it on the desk - lo and behold its my sons, still with my sons name tag.

AIBU to want to confront the boys mum? Could it be that she hadnt noticed?

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valiumredhead · 21/09/2012 09:30

Talk to the teacher not the other mum.

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MrSunshine · 21/09/2012 09:30

It could easily be she hadn't noticed. Just ask her for it back, its not a big deal.

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lljkk · 21/09/2012 09:34

It's easy to do, ime. Unless the surname is externally very visible on a collar or sleeve.

omg, do not confront, it's unobservant, but you make it sound like malice which you have no proof of.
Tell the teacher if you must mention it to anyone.

One time we bought a jumper from school Lost Property Sale. School staff had looked it over, I looked it over, no labels. DS wore it one day & taking it off saw a name label -- in a rather odd place. We hastily returned it (sure enough to child of someone I had fallen out with, eek).

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wherearemyGOLDsocks · 21/09/2012 09:35

£30 for a school jumper! Sorry not helpful. Did you get it back? Just mention it to her. I'm not sure I'd notice.

When my dd1 was at nursery, so not in uniform, she brought someone else's cardigan home that was the same as hers. I didn't notice till months later when I was having a clear out of her drawers and noticed she had two of the same cardigan.

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DilysPrice · 21/09/2012 09:39

A woman I was fairly friendly with moved away and passed her DCs uniform on to me, which was kind of her. But when she handed them over there were other children's names on them Confused (not children I knew). I just had to cross my fingers that she'd had them handed on to her legitimately.

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AbbyRue · 21/09/2012 09:40

Maybe she hadn't noticed yes, it just annoyed me though. £30 yes, prep uniform only sold at specified supplier, the 2nd hand shop is my friend!!

I suppose I will mention to form teacher and to her if i do bump into her. Would it be rude to write a note and place on her sons peg? Just to say I have taken the jumper? (I haven't yet as he wouldn't have had anything to wear today)

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meditrina · 21/09/2012 09:43

Yes, of course things should be returned, to owner if you know them or to the school's lost property.

But, depending on the age of the child (and the laundry habits of the home) the parent might genuinely not notice for quite a while. Especially if they have an au pair.

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meditrina · 21/09/2012 09:46

Oh, and I would have taken the jumper back straight away as heaven only knows where it might end up next. The child with the wrong jumper has clearly lost his own and needs to hunt for it. The school will probably have some emergency clothing, so he's unlikely to be left uncomfortably cold.

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Acekicker · 21/09/2012 09:48

I can honestly say that unless it didn't fit (eg massively too large/small) I probably wouldn't notice if DS had someone else's jumper on. I don't check every item I wash for the correct name tag so how would I know...?

The only times I've picked up on it are when we've had obvious duplicates eg 2 tracky tops in the PE bag at the end of term, or DS comes home wearing one jumper and then there's another scrunched up in his bag.

I would really be quite peeved if a mum confronted me, basically accusing me of stealing her kid's uniform when I genuinely probably wouldn't have known it was going on.

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timeforathink · 21/09/2012 09:50

This happened to my son yesterday lol, he came home with someone elses tshirt on.The teachers are convinced he didnt take his off ,but its so obvious its not his .
Not sure what happened but i wondered if as he took his sweatshirt off and his t shirt came off too , and another child did the same and they accidently switched teachers are baffled so am I .

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McHappyPants2012 · 21/09/2012 09:52

I got DS name emborioded on the front under the logo it still went missing.

I had a child's jumper for over a month once as i kept forgettting to return it

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steppemum · 21/09/2012 10:14

I wouldn't notice wrong jumpers until the end of the week once I had washed them and had to return them to the correct childs drawer. Last week the jumpers didn't actually get worn, just dragged into school, so didn't get washed, so if ds had come home with wrong jumper last monday, I wouldn't notice til this sunday night, so nearly 2 weeks.

I think you are overreacting. Sorry you had to pay out for new one, but that isn't other parents fault.

Yes I would tell her or teacher or the boy that you had taken the jumper because it was yours.

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hhhhhhh · 21/09/2012 10:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jenny70 · 21/09/2012 10:18

I would say there is a fair chance it wasn't noticed.

My eldest 2 are pretty responsible with their stuff, and also quite neat. They get changed after school and put their uniforms away (well, hanging over a chair!) or in the wash, if dirty. If on the chair they might re-wear a jumper for many days before it needed a wash - and even after a wash I may not check the label specifically. I could see myself not realising an identical jumper was switched for days or up to a few weeks (especially if weather changed).

When I realised I would of course return with an appology for being so slack and not realising instantly.

There is a chance that she kept it knowing it wasn't hers - lots of people are caught out stealing from lost property (or worse), but you don't KNOW they did this knowingly.

Mention it to teacher, if you must. But overall the lesson is for your child to be responsible for their own stuff, putting it away, bringing it home.

Did you get the jumper back?

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AbbyRue · 21/09/2012 10:21

I wasn't going to confront all guns blazing, was just going to tell the mum that her son had DSs jumper ifyswim. Would the other boy not know though? The name tag is right there in the open?

I have emailed the teacher to remind the boy to leave the jumper aside at home time in case he gets picked up before/after I get there. I'm calm about it, well we have 2 now Grin

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Sokmonsta · 21/09/2012 10:26

I'd get the jumper back as soon as it was noticed that it was your child's. I wouldn't approach the parent unless I knew them well enough that a scene wouldn't be caused (had that as a child myself!), they will likely assume dc has misplaced or start asking others if they've got it by mistake. If you get asked its your choice whether to 'fess up and say you took the jumper as it was actually your child's, or genuinely say you haven't seen the jumper of the child in question. But let maybe let the teacher know so the class isn't turned upside down looking for something that isn't there.

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HolyAutumnGoldBatman · 21/09/2012 10:31

She probably didn't notice. I wouldn't go through my 9 year olds uniform each day to make sure he hadn't picked anyone elses up. He went to school in a jumper, he came home in a jumper nothing there to make her think she needs to check the name label.

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sue52 · 21/09/2012 10:38

I wouldn't have noticed till I washed it. I certainly wouldn't have gone through the DC's uniform everyday to check the labels.

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SoleSource · 21/09/2012 10:40

Msybe tne chdren have tbe same jumpets and Mum did not notice. Maybe Mum did notice and asjed her child to hand ot back to teacjer and he did not follow through. Give her the benefit of tne doubt. Annoying. My DS had the same leather jacket as his friend and his Mum took my DS's jacket home. Three weeks later I got it back.

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bran · 21/09/2012 10:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

stealthsquiggle · 21/09/2012 10:45

I would probably only notice as/when I slung it in the washing machine. If I know the parent concerned, I will text them to save them combing the house for lost items (DD and her friends seemed to go through a phase of getting changed into games kit and shovelling uniform randomly into the nearest bags Hmm, and they go home in their games kit).

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marge2 · 21/09/2012 10:48

I always check labels when ironing, in fact, so I know which of my 2 DSs piles the article goes in. I would always notice, and always hand back, but perhaps not till ironing day.

I would have just asked for the jumper on the day and asked the teacher to let the other Mum know that her kid had someone elses. No need to mention whose.

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McKayz · 21/09/2012 10:52

DS1 has lost a jumper. He came home with another boys last week and DS1's has just completely disappeared so now we have 1 jumper to last us a week and the uniform lady only comes in now and then.

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HappyAsChips · 21/09/2012 12:12

She probably didn't notice.

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TheSmallPrint · 21/09/2012 12:27

Ask the school office to add a not on their email roundup asking parents to check labels and return.

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