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To wonder what the hell happens to boys at birthday parties

(241 Posts)
pouffepants Sat 15-Sep-12 21:17:45

I've had this before. Boys that behave perfectly reasonably at all other times seem to morph into crazy creatures as soon as they enter a party.

Dd2's 6th party this afternoon. Invited a mix of boys and girls, but several of the boys couldn't come so only had 3. The boy who lives a few houses down, plays round regularly, so I know he usually behaves fine. A very small quiet mouse of a boy, renowned for being a complete sweetie. And a boy I didn't know well, but had heard was lively.

Now I expect a bit of daft and rowdy behaviour since they're excited, but honestly it was ridiculous. Literally, the second they charged through the door it turned into the scene of a crazy OTT kids film. Just hurling everything they could get their hands on at each other, jumping off stuff etc.

The girls were fine, a couple excitable, but behaved fine and joined in. But the boys? They said they wanted to play pass the parcel. So they all sat in a circle nicely, but as soon as it got to one of the boys, it just got hurled across the room. Anything involving music, just turned into fighting, not just play fighting, properly kicking each other in the head.

They went in dd's room, and they literally just pulled everything out and started smashing it against the walls, and each other. Had to bring everyone downstairs again because they were trying to smash the computer. This is a boy who plays on it perfectly nicely, when he comes round to play.

So I got the food out, and they made no attempt to eat at all, just smearing it all over each other, throwing it, pouring drinks around. I really don't like telling other people's kids off, especially at a party, but I had no choice. Spent the whole afternoon having to separate, and 'have a word', whereas my 16yo ds could manage all 8 girls no problem while I was talking to boys who seemed in a zombified crazed state.

The boy I know best, on an average day I might say 'no, we don't do that' and he'll stop, no probs. Today spent the whole of musical chairs having to hold onto him on the sofa, because if I let go, he charged into the middle of the room and knocked all the chairs over and tried to throw them. This was all before any food, so I can't blame junk.

This sort of divide has been obvious at every party I've ever done, so why do boys get SOOO hyper, while the girls just get a bit excited?

Chubfuddler Sat 15-Sep-12 21:41:52

I'm saying it doesn't happen. I've never seen boys behave as the op describes. Ever. And I grew up in a house full of boys (two elder brothers only daughter) and have a six year old son whose class is 3/4 boys.

DoMeDon Sat 15-Sep-12 21:42:20

I'm just trying to play bingo without knowing what a dauber is smile

I don't think this happens - I think some DC are vile, some are lovely. I think some parents are hot on discipline, some aren't. On the whole my DC get attacked by boys more often than girls - I still don't think all boys are attack dogs.

exoticfruits Sat 15-Sep-12 21:42:59

It will happen if you let them get away with it. It may be a party but you have to be tough from the start- tell them they behave or you phone the parents and send them home. Boys will wrestle for fun - girls don't, in general.

Kayano Sat 15-Sep-12 21:43:20

You do know I have a second diplomacy bingo card right? grin

WhereMyMilk Sat 15-Sep-12 21:44:11

<cheats and steaks kids felt tips>

grin grin grin

WhereMyMilk Sat 15-Sep-12 21:44:26

Steals even!

PiratesKnittingTreasure Sat 15-Sep-12 21:45:26

amillion, I have been to a fair few parties in my time and seen some boisterous behaviour but never boys smashing up a computer and smearing food everywhere hmm.

I'm sick to the back teeth of this total "boys are so shit girls are so fab shite". It's no bloody surprise that the conception boards have endless "sob, i'm having a boy" threads.

These boys were utterly out of control and badly behaved - my kids would simply never behave like that because they know there would be hell to pay.

Oh and gordy, grin!

amillionyears Sat 15-Sep-12 21:45:28

I'll add my experience to the mix.
About 7 boys invited to my Ds 7th birthday at our house.We didnt know any better.
Luckily DH arrived early on. We locked the doors of the house.
Moved furniture/valuables/our own younger children out the way.
Everyone then had a lovely time except for possibly 1 boy who was on the bottom of the pile more often than the others it seemed to us.

Obviously didnt repeat the experience.But did take most of them out the following year to the cinema.All perfectly well behaved.

Kayano Sat 15-Sep-12 21:45:51

Oh Autocorrect - I bet you are a boy, getting all overexcited like that

WorraLiberty Sat 15-Sep-12 21:46:28

As a Mother of 3 boys I can honestly say this sounds like a total lack of adult supervision.

Nothing to do with what they have between their legs....

Kayano Sat 15-Sep-12 21:46:49

pats pirates I was the opposite. I would love a boy grin

PiratesKnittingTreasure Sat 15-Sep-12 21:46:54

DS2 got hit and knocked to the ground by a girl at a soft play place the other day. He's 2 and tiny, she was about 5.

Maybe I should have started a thread saying don't go to soft play places if there are any girls there because they are all violent thugs hmm?

DowagersHump Sat 15-Sep-12 21:47:29

I've been to seven 5 and 6 year old boys' birthday parties in the last year and never seen anything like this.

On the other hand, my friend's DD is the only child I don't allow to play upstairs with my DS unsupervised because the house gets absolutely trashed.

So, in conclusion ... fuck all

PiratesKnittingTreasure Sat 15-Sep-12 21:48:25

grin kayano - sorry, it's a sore point as you can probably tell. My boys are utterly adorable and I won't have idiots painting the whole of one gender as marauding yobs.

MissBetseyTrotwood Sat 15-Sep-12 21:48:48

Never happened at any boys parties we've been to. And I have all boys, so that's quite a few. I'd have called the parents to come fetch any child that behaved like that at my house.

So anyhow, you sound as though it was a stressful day though. At least it will be another year before you have to face the like again. grin

DoMeDon Sat 15-Sep-12 21:49:17

In conclusion - some DC behave badly sometimes <shocker>

Has anyone got a line???

DoMeDon Sat 15-Sep-12 21:50:00

<Given up the bingo and in search of hard drugs> wink

ssssh Sat 15-Sep-12 21:52:13

I have 3 boys, 5 6 & 7. The last part we had, in our small house, had 7 7 yr olds, 2 x6 and 2 x 5. We went to the cinema where they behaved beautifully then back to ours for birthday tea. Admittedly they did go a bit nuts for half an hour but once they'd let off steam (and we'd confiscated a small armoury of toy swords) they settled down. I'd be appalled if my children behaved like this and would not tolerate such behaviour - smashing things and throwing food is just awful. Yes, boys in general are more lively than girls and seem to have a compulsion to run and climb etc, but then again my DSD is definitely the liveliest of my bunch and a real ring leader!

Kayano Sat 15-Sep-12 21:53:09

shock drugs?! But... But.... You are a girl! shock

amillionyears Sat 15-Sep-12 21:53:38

Pirates,yes I am like you in that respect.I have not seen or heard of that sort of behaviour,and yes it looks like in the ops example, they were badly behaved and out of control.
I am not saying the boys in my example were violent or even badly behaved.
They were all actually the best of friends.We had picked them up from school,brought them back,and they then proceeded to have a whale of a time.

Kayano Sat 15-Sep-12 21:53:41

Aren't you? scratches head

DoMeDon Sat 15-Sep-12 21:55:12

Most of the time grin

But I like to run/climb so may be part boy confused wink

SomersetONeil Sat 15-Sep-12 21:56:00

Oh please, OP.

Sorry. But what a load of old shite. I have never seen what you describe. Never seen it even as a one-off, let alone repeatedly.

I know small girls who are - repeatedly - way more trouble and a handful at get-togethers than boys - but I'm not going to draw any ludicrous conclusions around that.

PiratesKnittingTreasure Sat 15-Sep-12 21:56:28

Tut tut Kayano, girls don't take drugs. That is for those awful yobbish boys don't you know?

Yes, my boys have bags of energy - they're utterly fab, they turn everything into an adventure and a story and a game! But, they also have manners, respect others property, share, and certainly would never vandalise someone's house shock.

tulipgrower Sat 15-Sep-12 21:58:45

I guess I have something to look forward to. My DS1's 4th birthday with 5 little boys was a delight, the children were so well behaved I thought they'd been sedated.
The most shocking moment was when one child ask if he could have sweets from a bowl in front of him on the table, I said sure, (lots of plates/bowls on the table containing unlimited amounts of food/treats for all) he then asked "how many?". I was shocked, and repled "2", which was a ridiculously low number for the size of these tiny sweets. He took 2 and put them on his plate, he then passed the bowl to the next child. Each boy only took two each and the bowl landed back basically full on the table! Bizarre.

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