To wonder what the hell happens to boys at birthday parties

[pouffepants]

I've had this before. Boys that behave perfectly reasonably at all other times seem to morph into crazy creatures as soon as they enter a party.

Dd2's 6th party this afternoon. Invited a mix of boys and girls, but several of the boys couldn't come so only had 3. The boy who lives a few houses down, plays round regularly, so I know he usually behaves fine. A very small quiet mouse of a boy, renowned for being a complete sweetie. And a boy I didn't know well, but had heard was lively.

Now I expect a bit of daft and rowdy behaviour since they're excited, but honestly it was ridiculous. Literally, the second they charged through the door it turned into the scene of a crazy OTT kids film. Just hurling everything they could get their hands on at each other, jumping off stuff etc.

The girls were fine, a couple excitable, but behaved fine and joined in. But the boys? They said they wanted to play pass the parcel. So they all sat in a circle nicely, but as soon as it got to one of the boys, it just got hurled across the room. Anything involving music, just turned into fighting, not just play fighting, properly kicking each other in the head.

They went in dd's room, and they literally just pulled everything out and started smashing it against the walls, and each other. Had to bring everyone downstairs again because they were trying to smash the computer. This is a boy who plays on it perfectly nicely, when he comes round to play.

So I got the food out, and they made no attempt to eat at all, just smearing it all over each other, throwing it, pouring drinks around. I really don't like telling other people's kids off, especially at a party, but I had no choice. Spent the whole afternoon having to separate, and 'have a word', whereas my 16yo ds could manage all 8 girls no problem while I was talking to boys who seemed in a zombified crazed state.

The boy I know best, on an average day I might say 'no, we don't do that' and he'll stop, no probs. Today spent the whole of musical chairs having to hold onto him on the sofa, because if I let go, he charged into the middle of the room and knocked all the chairs over and tried to throw them. This was all before any food, so I can't blame junk.

This sort of divide has been obvious at every party I've ever done, so why do boys get SOOO hyper, while the girls just get a bit excited?

[DoMeDon]

[Kayano]

sits back

[Gumby]

They're just more physical

They need exercise every day , a bit like dogs!

Jus have girls from now on

[gordyslovesheep]

not if the people in charge take charge and act as an adult :)

[Chubfuddler]

I don't believe you. I don't know any boys who routinely behave like this at parties, and if there was even a hint of them getting close to over excited, their parents are down on them like a ton of bricks.

[omfgkillmenow]

Just showing off their alpha maleness to the girls

[DoMeDon]

Do you need a dauber Kayano?

[PowerDresser]

Don't invite boys next time.

[gordyslovesheep]

or this

[Gumby]

I'm assuming the parents had dropped off & left?

[larks35]

What you describe sounds pretty bad. I have a 3yo boy and 5 nephews ranging from 4 to 13. Yes, they get excited but they know their manners in other people's homes. I might be flamed but I blame the parents! Even my slightly out of control nephew (4yo) wouldn't do this in someone else's house.

[PiratesKnittingTreasure]

Is it worth saying anything?

As the mother of two boys myself I can only say your ridiculous generalisation is just that - a generalisation. My boys have never behaved like that at a party and most of the parties I've been to (one only a couple of weeks ago) have loads of boys who behave perfectly well. Excitable yes? But the vandalism you describe? No.

But thanks for smearing all boys with the tag of thug - it really helps in a world that largely condems them at the best of times .

[gordyslovesheep]

if it helps Pirates my 3 girls are vile

[Kayano]

Yes Thank you for the dauber MIL stole mine evil witch

[WhatYouLookingAt]

Don't have any boys OP? Shocker.

PS, Over-dramatic much? I don't at all believe it was as you state.

[Alliwantisaroomsomewhere]

It is just plain old over excitement. I am a childminder and one of the 7 year old girsl in particular gets VERY excited sometimes. But I do agree: some boys seem to become far more over excitable that some girls.

It seems to be taboo to comment on the differences between girls and boys / men and women. Boys and girls, on the whole, play differently from each other and react differently from each other. On the whole. Not always. Usually, though.

I stupidly took 6 seven year old boys for a birthday tea for my 7yr old DS. It was hell on earth. I have NO doubt that had it been 6 girls, it would have been a completely different outing!

YANBU.

[omfgkillmenow]

i always thought it was spelt dobber...see you learn something new everyday

[DoMeDon]

Me too OMF - I just googled the dobber and was corrected

[Kayano]

So did I but I copied common and uses a pen

[Kayano]

X posts! How lame are we?!

[Alliwantisaroomsomewhere]

I do agree that OP's description sounds a bit OTT and I would certainly NEVER tolerate my DS behaving that way, nor would I have any hesitation in ensureing that boys (or girls) in my home conducted themselves properly.

Still, OP, on the whole : YANBU.

[5inthebed]

And I bet all the girls wore pink and all the boys had trains on their tops?

Honestly, not all boys act like that, what you have described is quite extreme. Smearing food and smashing up your dds room? I'd have called the parents or told the parents about he behaviour at the end of the party.

I have three boys and would be horrified if they had behaved like that.

[amillionyears]

Are some posters saying this doesnt happen ?

[Kayano]

I think it's the generalisation that all boys are like that

So take your back or give it to OP

[Chubfuddler]

I'm saying it doesn't happen. I've never seen boys behave as the op describes. Ever. And I grew up in a house full of boys (two elder brothers only daughter) and have a six year old son whose class is 3/4 boys.