to not sit on my DFs' sofa?

[ChaosTrulyReigns]

Now I have the never erasable knowledge that they frequenty have c-e-x on it.

Bleurgh.

It's not wipeable pleather either.

[ChaosTrulyReigns]

DFriends not DFathers.

Just to pre-empt any speculation.

[thebody]

Did u catch them at it???

[SaggyOldClothCatPuss]

Do you never have C-E-X?? On your own sofa then??

[StateofConfusion]

Chaos dya mean sex? Because I don't know what cex is.

If the former yanbu.

[ChaosTrulyReigns]

C-e-x is for beds, Saggs.

Obvis.

And, nope, I was told.

Ugh.

[SaggyOldClothCatPuss]

C-e-x is for beds, sofas, rugs, countertops, cars, hay barns, woods, showers, trampolines..... There are people and animals having c-e-x everywhere! In fact, there are probably microscopic animals having c-e-x on your person, right now!

[ChaosTrulyReigns]

Hmm.

How old are you Saggs?

[IHeartKingThistle]

I read the thread title as DFS sofa.

And yet still clicked on it...

[cocolepew]

In bed with the lights off and your nightie pushed up a little bit. Thats c-e-x. You can take your socks off if you dont want to use protection.

[CadleCrap]

Could you just perch on the arm?

But there again, she might have been bending over that

[SaggyOldClothCatPuss]

37!

[CouthyMow]

ARF at Chaos asking your age, Saggy. Chaos, erm, she's old enough to sell bloody yummy pies that I could be persuaded to sell my firstborn for.

[thebody]

How old r u chaos??

We have had sex everywhere in our house ( except kids rooms) but in every house we have rented and owned, also caravans, holiday lets, hotels, and once in a tent ( as camping shite so only done it once).

Married 25 years next year.

Advice is get a grip.

[puffyankles]

Any c-e-x fluids will have seeped into the pleather by now so it should be safe.

[CouthyMow]

My C-E-X life is drier than the Sahara, and I am 6 years younger than you, Saggy.

[cormsilkye]

you could buy them a throw or wear a chemical suit when you visit?

[ChaosTrulyReigns]

Not pleather.

Fucking fabric.

[porous]

[thebody]

Hi Cocolepew matey, good to chat on less anxious threads x

[puffyankles]

yes, cormsilke, or this.

[ChaosTrulyReigns]

Gosh, thebody, aren't you a c-e-x radical? C-e-x in every room? In every house? On every holiday? Gosh.

Maybe I've just done it considerably more than everyone else and am beyond bonking in uncomfy places?

[cocolepew]

Hello to you too

[cormsilkye]

I don't have sex in any room without a telly

[ZacharyQuack]

Could you discretely take a tarpaulin with you when you visit?

[Nagoo]

That's why my Nan made us sit on folded up newspapers!

[cocolepew]

I haven't had sex since December. I think I'm a virgin again.