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AIBU?

to get cut off mid-sente...

23 replies

MummyMacca · 15/05/2012 15:05

So here's the scene. I'm talking to my dear Mother, M-i-L, similar and I'll be mid-flow. Seriously getting into what I'm saying, y'know, making a point or cracking a funny and then BAM, DS1 or DS2 barges in and starts spouting off as children do, interrupting me at a tremendous rate of knots. This ends anything valid/valuable/entertaining that I have to say, as all attention thereafter is devoted to said child.

Scenario: Me: 'and she stepped on the ba...' ds1 slides in stage left: 'I LOVE LILY SHE'S MY GIRLFRIEND AND ONE DAY WE'RE GETTING MARRIEEEEEEEED' Mum/M-i-L: 'Really darling?? How interesting, tell me all about it in great detail, your mother was boring the knickers off me anyway' wanders off with said child stage right. Me: 'so basically what everyone here would like me to do is shaddap and stand over there then?'

Maybe I'm being unreasonable, but this happens a lot. Maybe I'm actually deadly boring.

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manicbmc · 15/05/2012 15:07

I'm pretty sure I used to do that, when I was a small child. I'm also pretty sure the only attention I got for it was a sharp 'it's very rude to interrupt' and then I was ignored.

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Cluffyfunt · 15/05/2012 15:11

I would concentrate on teaching your DC that it is rude to interrupt people when they are speaking because it is rude and won't go down well at school.

Ps
When you find a fool proof way of doing this, be a love and let me know how Wink

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HeathRobinson · 15/05/2012 15:15

Yes, it's horrible. You have to get in there with a 'tell grandma in a minute, darling, we're just talking' etc, before grandma gets sucked in.

If she'll listen to you, you could prime grandma upfront so you're both on the same page.

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MummyMacca · 15/05/2012 15:16

Yeah, have tried the stern reprimand followed up with a glare.

Interesting that they do only do this when they know that they will receive the attention they desire from a soft cuddly grandma, so I guess it makes sense, if only in their brains.

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Ithinkitsjustme · 15/05/2012 15:16

I had this with my youngest recently. I was chatting to a friend in Tesco when 3 year old starts sayng "Mummy", pulling on my leg. Me "I'm talking", her "MUMMY" etc, this went on for a couple of minutes - and then she wet herself!! Blush
YANBU to expect your children to wait until yu have finished before interrupting. Do you tell them to wait or just accept that they can interupt as and when without saying anything.

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MummyMacca · 15/05/2012 15:17

heath I wonder who listens to me less, my children or their grandmas. Interesting thought...

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TheHouseOnTheCorner · 15/05/2012 15:18

My MIL does that. Makes me feel she only come to see the DC and not me. Hmm V annoying.

I met a woman at the bus stop yesterday...she stopped to tell me that the buses were delayed...and then WHENEVER I said anything, she looked vaguely off into the distance...she wouldn't/couldn't respond to anythng I offered into the convo at all! It was weird!

She was fiendly and chatty...so I would respond and then her eyes would glaze and she'd look away...then turn back and talk again.

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Convict224 · 15/05/2012 15:21

I'm jealous. My next door neighbour does this when I'm talking to her.

Me: so she said to her boss...
Her: my dog's got fleas
Me: no she didn't mention fleas or her dog
Her: my dog has fleas, I saw them. Hopping and leaping all over him.

She defies the 80/20 rule, the conversation is 97% her and 3% me. I actually don't think I have ever completed a sentence. You should explore the possibility of your children coming to live next door to me. They would fit right in.

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ladyintheradiator · 15/05/2012 15:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SparkyTGD · 15/05/2012 15:23

My DM does this Grin

I can be having a conversation with her, DS will interrupt & DM (his gran, pattern here, OP) will talk to him instead.

I just brush it off, tbh, think she's probably just pleased that he is giving her attention & she him.

And I go and talk to someone who will listen, friends usually Grin

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TheHouseOnTheCorner · 15/05/2012 15:25

Oh people like that are so funny Convict especially if you confuse them...

ME: So I went to the hairdresseres and they had a new girl...
HER: My foot's gotten infected...
ME: And what's more, the colour of a dogs wee has got NOTHING to do with my dress size..
HER:Eh?
ME: Oh. I thought we were playing change the subject...

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diddl · 15/05/2012 15:25

I will be that GMBlush

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MrsNouveauRichards · 15/05/2012 15:28

This drives me mad. If my children interrupt when I am having a conversation, I will say "can it wait, I am talking to ..." Which usually works despite them being small. But so many people will happily break off a conversation with another adult because their child has asked them to read a book/play 'right this minute'

There is one mum at the toddler groups who will start talking to you, but when she has had enough of the conversation she will just say "hmm" and physically turn so her back to you! Does make me laugh now.

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Convict224 · 15/05/2012 15:29

Oh yes House, I am adopting that tactic today. Thank you!

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MummyMacca · 15/05/2012 15:34

house I wonder if bus stop woman knew you were actually there. Could have been talking to the bus stand itself a la Shirley Valentine in the kitchen and her conversation with inanimate objects: 'Hellooo Wall!'

Repeat offenders should be given a good dose of their own medicine though.

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TheHouseOnTheCorner · 15/05/2012 15:37

Mummy maybe I'm dead and just think people can see me...she was probably as you say, just having a little chat to the timetable...and I assumed she could see me!

Excuse me...can you tell me when the next bus is and can you see dead people?

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HexagonalQueenOfTheSummer · 15/05/2012 15:40

My mum is the same; I think she actually takes pleasure in cutting me off to attend to the DCs every whim.

I've stopped pulling my mum up on it as it had no effect and instead I pull the DCs up on it 'We are talking, you can talk in a few minutes, thank you'. This doesn't give my mum time to go off on a tangent talking to them and re-inforces my point to her!

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MummyMacca · 15/05/2012 15:45

house ha ha!! Hadn't actually considered the being dead thing! That answers a lot of questions; I totally empathised with Bruce Willis all the way through Sixth Sense, watching it for the billionth time the other night-now I know why.

hexagonal I truly consider it my mum's sweet, sweet revenge for all the times I ignored her as a horrible teen. Confused

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TheHouseOnTheCorner · 15/05/2012 15:46
Grin
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bettybat · 15/05/2012 16:03

Oefff! When my kids start doing that, they'll be getting a stern talking too - as would my DM Wink

I was out shopping with a friend and her mum the other day, and her mum would start a conversation, I would respond and then she would change the conversation as soon as I'd gotten into the topic:

Friend's mum: I'm thinking of having a fringe cut
Me: Oh yeah? That would look nice, I think that would suit you, you have-
Friend's mum: What do you think of these shoes?

I mean - I wouldn't mind but 99% of the time, we were talking about her anyway! It's not like I was just being intensely self-absorbed the entire time. I spent most of the conversation just trying to keep up, and see if we could keep on track of ONE topic for more than a couple of minutes.

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fotheringhay · 15/05/2012 16:29

Ooooooooo this pees me off no end! Both my DM and MIL are chronic interrupters. Doesn't matter if I'm excited, upset, sharing important information...

DM has always been like it. The first time I was properly listened to (by a good friend) it felt really weird. Ability to listen properly is now a trait I value above almost all others.

God that felt good Smile

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MummyMacca · 15/05/2012 16:47

Wryly smiling now at the talking to a friend thing feeling weird. It does feel strangely odd when someone listens, makes eye contact and pays you attention and it's not because you promised them a Nerf gun.

The interrupty thing is bad enough, with volume going up to 11, and you're merely left floundering and merely mouthing the word you were about to say, but the being completely blanked by DH in the evening post-kids on attempting grown-up talk, eliciting 'oh wow, I better check his pulse'-type reaction, is equally as trying.

sigh

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PoppyWearer · 15/05/2012 18:02

YANBU. I thought for a minute I had started this thread. Happens to me ALL THE TIME.

My MIL is a chronic interrupter and my 3yo DD seems to have inherited her tendency to just open her mouth at the time that suits her best and spew forth whatever is in her brain that second, regardless of what I am in the middle of saying.

Baby DS is already showing tendencies to babble on regardless. I suppose he thinks it's normal because DD never fucking shuts up.

DH also doesn't listen. His brain is fried from work.

Thank feck for Mumsnet and female friends!

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