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To draw the line at breastfeeding my hairbrush

(57 Posts)
TheAvocadoOfWisdom Thu 12-Apr-12 21:16:34

DD is 18m and bf morning and evening. In the last month or so, she's become very insistent on having her favourite cuddly monkey and dinosaur breastfeed too. She finishes feeding on one side, then holds up monkey to let him feed, making pretend sucking noises, and then gives dinosaur a turn. Repeat on other side, and then back to the first several times. It's become a bit of a ritual, although she does miss out dinosaur if she's tired.

Yesterday, I had to breastfeed a toy car. Fine, ok, it's a one off. Today she wants me to breastfeed my hairbrush. I said no (in a cheery, casual way), and she had a full-on tantrum (the sort where toddlers make their body all melty so you can't hold on to them, and then when you try to lie them on the floor they arch their backs so that you can't put them down easily, followed by kicking and wailing).

AIBU? Or should I indulge her?

ladyfirenze Thu 12-Apr-12 21:18:30

'had to' biscuit

Kayano Thu 12-Apr-12 21:19:37

Sorry but.... LMFAO grin

Whatmeworry Thu 12-Apr-12 21:20:41

Now that's what I call extended breastfeeding. Just don't get sucked into b/f the hoover.....bottle for that i think grin

SuePurblyBusinesslike Thu 12-Apr-12 21:21:31

No. It is spikier even than a dinosaur.

ladyfirenze Thu 12-Apr-12 21:25:21

perhaps you need to check the hairbrush is latching correctly before we continue this debate.....

smearedinfood Thu 12-Apr-12 21:28:07

You should inform the toddler of the correct use of a hairbrush by singing into in front of a mirror with an 80s sound track

TheAvocadoOfWisdom Thu 12-Apr-12 21:34:21

smearedinfood all of my attempts to inform said toddler of the correct use of anything at all have been met with a declaration of "mine" and the classic grab-object-and-hold-next-to-self-while-turning-away-from-mother tactic. I swear the first two weren't so difficult.

I usually clip her nails when shes feeding as I can ensure she'll be relatively still, but there's no way I'm trying that at the moment.

curiositykitten Thu 12-Apr-12 21:36:47

This is the stage at which I demonstrated to my DD that she, too, had nipples! She started feeding her own toys/books/teddies/hairbrushes shortly afterwards.

Tiddlyompompom Thu 12-Apr-12 21:40:55

I've now got an awful mental image of you breastfeeding a nail clipper grin
curiosity has the solution methinks...

puds11 Thu 12-Apr-12 21:41:16

The hairbrush needs feeding and setteling too. It'll feel left out, and that'll come back to bite you in the ass

neverquitesure Thu 12-Apr-12 21:49:08

YANBU. I refuse to bf anything without a mouth. Today I have bfed a cuddly toy, a small Hello Kitty and (ironically) a plastic cow.

DD is nearly 2 and despite repeatedly drawing her attention to her own nipples she insists on bottle-feeding her dolls and toys and bringing them to me for bfing as her "boobies not have Mummy milk" confused

3 year old DS however (who incidentally was bottle fed) is more than happy to roll up his tshirt and latch his toys on. Never seen him feeding a hairbrush though...

lolajane2009 Thu 12-Apr-12 21:53:03

tell her the haibrush is on nursing strike atm and doesnt want to feed

TheSoggyBunny Thu 12-Apr-12 22:04:49


I'm glad i am not the only one bf a dinosaur

ThePathanKhansWitch Thu 12-Apr-12 22:27:21


Devora Thu 12-Apr-12 22:29:36

I would be indulging for all it's worth. You will get YEARS of dinner party anecdotes out of this grin

McFluffster Thu 12-Apr-12 22:30:59

I can't believe you are denying your hairbrush the breast milk it deserves. Selfish, you are.

TCOB Thu 12-Apr-12 22:33:40

I do understand it must be a PITA but at the same time - that is really one of the cutest toddler things I have ever heard. As long as she doesn't start expecting you do it in public...grin

DoWhatYouLikeyWifey Thu 12-Apr-12 23:00:46

This is brilliant! I chortled at 'breastfeeding a toy car'

And notquitesure I loved reading your post.

BaronessBomburst Fri 13-Apr-12 00:31:19

I didn't mind BF the toy Gruffalo, but it was odd when I was expected to feed the picture on the DVD box as well. confused

LoopyLoeufdePaques Fri 13-Apr-12 00:36:10

brilliant smile

FetchezLaVache Fri 13-Apr-12 00:40:35

Oh dear... DS is nearly 2, a veritable monster for the tit (so much so that he refers to it as "Me More"), yet has never once even hinted that I should BF anything inanimate. Is he a slow developer, or just insanely selfish? Should I be worried?

startail Fri 13-Apr-12 00:43:20

That's brilliantgrin, DD2 BF for a very long time, but I don't think she ever asked me to feed anything else. (shudders at the thought of the number of cars and playmobil people that might be hungry)

Nor oddly did she pretend to BF her toys, she always used bottles. In fact the only time she's ever drunk out of a bottle is when she put squash in one she was playing with.

Slightly sad that even to a child who BF past school age, bottles are what she associates with feeding babies.

ladyfirenze Fri 13-Apr-12 01:21:16

pissing self at feeding of gruffalo dvd grin

MummytoKatie Fri 13-Apr-12 03:51:40

Dd stopped feeding on one side about 4 months ago. Thinking it was the start of self weaning I let her and the milked dried up. 4 months later she is still going strong and we now have "dd milk" and "monkey milk". Poor monkey never gets the side with the milk in.

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