Wearing rings - but not married

[YonderRevoltingPeasantWhoIsHe]

Gah, it's too late to type out a proper question. Recently, an unmarried couple, friends of ours, bought 'wedding rings' to wear. They have no intention of marrying.

What do you think of this - is it like 'playing married' or just a nice sign that they are both 'taken'?

[troisgarcons]

I dont think anything other than they bought some jewelry.

[dottygirl1]

Maybe the consider them as commitment rings??

[PlumpDogPillionaire]

With trois on this - whatever floats their boats...
If one of them's more serious than the other, could get complicated in future, though.

[gallicgirl]

Better than having the partner's name tattooed somewhere.

[MenopausalHaze]

It's a bit wanky but as far as I know still not illegal. Leave them be to their wankiness!

[helpmabob]

I don't see a problem with it. Wedding rings are just a social construct. Why shouldn't they.

[Spenguin]

I wore a wedding ring for just over a year until I got married. I did so because we were just waiting on a semblance of stability before formally getting married (i.e. it was already a done-deal, in essence) and as I didn't want an engagement ring, I wore a wedding band as a 'token'.

In all came down to us decreeing that we didn't need an authority to declare us man and wife.

However, as this couple has no intention of marrying, that does seem a little odd, but, then again, not everyone's for marriage. It's not hurting anyone and it's their business. I agree with gallicgirl re the tattoo thing though!

[Spenguin]

*oh, btw, during the actual wedding ceremony, I didn't take it off and have him put it back on again. We just didn't exchange - what's more, he doesn't wear jewellery, so in fact, the ceremony was very fluid.

[DeckTheHugeWithBoughsOfManatee]

What gallic said - it's a bit odd, but definitely beats getting a tattoo.

[YonderRevoltingPeasantWhoIsHe]

Interested to know why people think it's wanky..... Why wankier than a married couple wearing rings? Why odder than only one half of a married couple wearing a ring?

[Floggingmolly]

It's wankier than a married couple wearing wedding rings because there hasn't been a wedding. If you disagree with marriage, fair enough, but why choose to display the symbols without the ceremony?

[olgaga]

Hilarious. She's obviously been mithering him half to death.

[PlumpDogPillionaire]

Judy and Johnny just walked through the door....

Sorry, couldn't help it, 'tis what this thread's put me in mind of.

[slavetofilofax]

I have an unmarried friend that has a lovely 'reserved ring' as she likes to call it, and another who has a very sparkly commitment ring.

It's completely up to them what they wear and what it means to them. Personally, I always knew that at some point I would want to get married, so I would never have chosen to wear anything other than an engagement or wedding ring on that finger. Although dh is welcome to get me an eternity ring if he wants!

My Mum and step da wore wedding rings for years before they got married, because they were committed but my Mum didn't want to get married to him when I was still young. And my Gran wears a wedding ring even though she walked out on the only man she was ever married to over 30 years ago and then slagged him off until he died 10 years ago. I find that a bit odd, but still. It's a harmelss thing that makes some people happy, that's all.

[LulaBear]

Would think this is a bit odd tbh, like they're making a vague statement. They might not be of course, but it just seems odd to me

[jasper]

I'm not married and wear a wedding ring. Perhaps that supports the wanky theory

[neilyourbedroomsonfire]

It seems to me that your friends may have no intention of marrying but also have no intention of ever parting and the ring is a symbol of their love for each other.

It may also act as a deterrent for potential suitors that they are both "off the market" so to speak.

Or it may just be their way of getting attention and getting people talking!

[LEttletownofBOFlehem]

It's sounds like a personal romantic symbol between the two of them, and nobody else's business really.

[cowboylover]

My now DH was always asked why he wore a wedding ring before we where married but it was his engagement ring as he didnt want it to be an ownership thing. He didnt ask me to get engaged it is something we wanted to do together so we both had engagement rings and then 5 years later we now have our wedding rings

But to have no intention of getting married its a bit different but I do think it maybe a commitment ring?

[sozzledchops]

just leave them to it, does it matter or is the couple you and your partner and your looking to see if folk think you'll both be weird for doing this? I'm married but don't wear any rings, each to their own, not exactly a crime.

[Purpleroses]

Would guess that they see themselves as married/committed but for whatever reason don't actually want to get married (financial, social, too-much-stress, political).

Having been single for several years, it is very helpful if married men wear rings as it saves me time chatting them up only to find out that they're married Would be even better if all men with long-term girlfriends did so to, so I approve :)

[seeker]

It's a pathetic thing to do- worst of both worlds. And stupid.

[ASByatt]

oooh, bit strong, seeker? They're not hurting anyone!

[Cherriesarelovely]

Why is it pathetic? Who knows what the rings symbolise for them? What on earth does it matter to anyone else?