As much of a wwyd as an AIBU thing really.
DP and I are lodgers. We live with a family of Mum, Dad and 2yo Boy. DP has started to get irate about little things Dad does. Dad is an absolute clean freak, Mum complains about it and we thought it was a little entertaining at first, but it's slowly wearing thin. Our stuff gets moved around. I was sat doing knitting in the conservatory when we first arrived. Left a ball of yarn in there and when I came back it was gone. Our washing basket gets moved from the place in the kitchen where we were told it was okay to leave when we were doing washing to the bottom of the stairs (which then blocks the front door and the stairs). The draining board is rarely emptied, I do it a few times a day so we can fit our stuff on there (or balance it on top if I'm in a mood, and then have to clear all of it by the end of the day anyway!), I try to wash up their bits when I do the washing up to save them the effort yet when we leave one spoon on the side it's tutted over.
Dad also gets funny with me when I play with the boy but never speaks directly to me, only him such as saying "Careful, careful" when I was dipping him backwards, I stopped as he obviously didn't like me doing it and boy was begging me to keep doing it so he started talking to the boy in a different language. It bugs me as I work with kids for a living, I would never do anything to harm the child nor would I do something that could be of detriment to his development in any way.
It's all stuff that's easily ignored and I've been saying to DP not to bother saying anything. But on Monday we had someone coming to look at their room (as they're going away) and Dad 'deep cleaned' the bathroom. That night DP realised his face cloth had been used to clean with. I said don't worry, he probably mistook it as a cleaning cloth (they use flannels to clean with) as it had been left to dry by the window. I had a shower earlier, found my pouffe sponge shoved down the back of the cupboard where the mop lives absolutely filthy and reeking of cleaning solution. Dad also has a pouffe so he knew full well what it was.
Not only that but he started tutting and commenting when Mum asked me how much I charged for babysitting as she needed help this weekend. I said not to pay and he walked in as she was repeating an hourly price she knew I had charged a family earlier this week.
We know we're not perfect housemates. We try to stay clean and tidy but sometimes leave bits on the side if we forget or similar. We never get a chance to do any cleaning besides after ourselves as he hoovers every morning (even if somebody has done it before him!), clean down the sides thoroughly and the hob, etc.
The thing is they leave the country for 3 months at Christmas, we offended Mum a couple of weeks ago by bringing meat into the strictly vegetarian house (not maliciously, we brought a chinese as DP was feeling homesick and didn't even think about the chicken in his meal! She seems fine about it now.) and we'll be leaving before they get back. The Dad also doesn't speak English, we're sure he understands it as Mum speaks it to him in front of us but know he won't speak it so we'd have to go through the Mum to complain which feels petty to me.
I still don't think we should say anything but DP is riled up about it and doesn't even want to go downstairs in case he does say something. WWYD and WIBU to complain to the Mum?
AIBU?
About housemate?
confusedpixie · 30/11/2011 19:32
fuckity: A houseshare is our plan for next time. As it was all so sudden we just didn't have the time to go round to loads of houses in the short amount of time we could stay for before moving, and every house we looked at was dodgy in some way or another (obvious sub-letting, too many people with one toilet, dangerous kitchens, wanting us to sign up for minimum time periods which we couldn't afford if it went tits up, etc)
I've lived in many room and house shares before as it's been part of my work in the past but never lived as a lodger. DP has lived with a friend in their joint flat before but never in a houseshare. If we had problems we talked it out and it was resolved as we were all in the same situation. I feel very uncomfortable doing that here as we are in their house. After Christmas we may or may not have somebody else living with us as they're going to Dad's country for three months, which is why I'm saying to let it lie and ignore it for three more weeks. We have a brilliant deal that we can actually afford right now, we won't be able to afford anything more expensive until my job goes full time next March which is when we move out anyway.
squeakytoy: Because it is all we could afford moving to a new place with no jobs as we couldn't attend interviews without being here.
The thing is, the Mum is lovely, as is the boy, and the Dad is alright when we communicate, but we rarely do as he doesn't speak English and we don't speak his language.
Glad to know that the general opinion is that we shouldn't say anything though. Moving right now will be a nightmare which would include borrowing a significant amount from parents to fund the deposits and things. I'll convince DP to take on a few extra shifts at work and get him out of the house when I'm home to help him cope with it. I'll be fine biting my tongue. I've had worse than this! 
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