AIBU to ignore 'ticks'

[Whatdoyouthinkthen]

DD (8) has developed a 'tick' over the last few months.
She very quickly shakes her hands and arms as if she is shaking off water (if that makes sense).
She also shakes each leg at a time if she is sitting or lying down.
She does this every few minutes at it's worst.
AIBU to ignore it and not make a big deal out of it or should I really be doing something about it?

[Shutupanddrive]

I don't have any experience of this but would probably mention it your gp or health visitor and see what they say, but carry on ignoring it in front of her for now

[FantasticVoyage]

'Tic', not 'tick'.

[FantasticVoyage]

Unless she has blood-sucking insects attached to her flesh, of course.

[531800000008]

GP

[Whatdoyouthinkthen]

fantastic thank you! No little insects just involuntary movements!!

[squeakytoy]

How are you dealing with it at the moment?

[scaevola]

Here's the NHS page and here's a BBC page. There are tips for management on those pages.

[Whatdoyouthinkthen]

squeaky I ignore it generally but if it gets bad (a shake every minute or too violently) I say 'try not to shake now' she sometimes stops but not always.

[Rikalaily]

I had alot of tic's at that age, it started off with squinting, then twitching certain facial muscles, it escalated to saying certain words over and over, then touching objects a certain number of times, then touching objects a certain number of times while saying certain words etc. Drove my family and me mental, I have no idea what started it but I just didn't feel right if I didn't do it. My mum chose the ignore route and I eventually grew out of it, I turned into a clean freak though, everything had it's place (mum didn't mind that one, lol) and I eventually got over that compulsion too :o

[Whatdoyouthinkthen]

Thanks scaevola! I've been looking at others and they seem to be fairly common between 6-9 years. Possibly stress related?

[manticlimactic]

My DD used to have a few tics. Blinking eyes, coughing, so not limb movements. Both tics her dad (my ex) has, but when he coughs his legs fly up. I tried the ignore method and then the mentioning method and then the GP. He said she'd grow out of it.

But then my sister mentioned it to her and they stopped. I don't know whether she outgrew them that exact day or whether because someone other than her mother mentioning it did the trick.

[QOD]

My dd did that at that age for a long time, finally stopped at age 11 ish and now has restarted at nearly 13. Drives me frickin nuts.
She screws her nose up like a rabbit and grimaces and then frowns, then a fake cough. When she started clicking her fingers and straightening her arms last week I had to say something.
Praying she grows out of it (again)

[Whatdoyouthinkthen]

Rika do you think ignore option is best IYE? I think if I draw attention to it too much I will make her feel anxious.
She's not generally an anxious child, can get over excited though and has quite a busy life.

[Whatdoyouthinkthen]

:o QOD it's not driving us mad (yet)! :o

[Oggy]

Totally ignore IMO.

My son (younger, nearly 6) had a head shaking tick for several months. Husband and I stressed about it quite badly for a period but took the approach of ignoring it in front of my son and it did stop after a few months.

[Oggy]

• doh tic

[Whatdoyouthinkthen]

mantic thanks for your reply, it's interesting she stopped when others mentioned it. DD does it less when out with friends- I need to ask about school though!

[AgentZigzag]

I used to have a lot of what posters have described when I was younger, and had/have really bad OCD/anxiety problems.

What you describe Rika, sounds very similar to OCD with all the touching things a certain number of times etc, it's good it doesn't cause you too many problems now though.

[Whatdoyouthinkthen]

Oggy I think I'll try the same, I wondered about saying "relax a bit (name)" when it gets bad- what do you think?

[AgentZigzag]

With telling the person to relax, you run the risk of making something called 'ironic processing' worse.

It's when you know you should be supressing certain thoughts (or tics in this case) and relaxing, but the more you try and relax and avoid thinking about it, the more they intrude.

Oh the irony of it

I would say talk to her and try to figure out a way of dealing with it when she recognises she's doing it (which she might not do).

Only you and her will know the best way she can do that, maybe try a few things? Just be lighthearted and let her know she's got a bit of control over it.

[Sparklingbrook]

DS1 did the blinking. It stopped but we did take him to the opticians.

[Whatdoyouthinkthen]

Agent I can relate to that, I have noticed sometimes that when I have said something to her she can't resist and does it even more for a minute or so. At other times she will stop. That's really interesting.
I will talk to her, it doesn't upset her but says she can't help it. Her dad tends to shake his head and smile when she does it which makes her smile ( presumably because she knows what she's doing too?) I don't know...

[Rikalaily]

I think the ignoring was the best thing for me, mine was definately stress related and when my sisters and brother took the mickey out of me it got worse, probably why it escalated from a fairly minor squint to rituals etc. I'm still quite orderly about things, I'm not obsessive about housework etc like I used to be but I hate it when the dishwasher etc is stacked wrong, lol.

AgentZigZag I was told it was OCD by a phychologist that I saw as a teenager. The clean freak in me came out when I was about 11ish and lasted until I was about 24. I had to get a grip with that because people hated visiting me, I'd be grabbing thier cup off them as soon as they had finished, would be cleaning as I talked to them etc, makes me cringe now thinking about how uncomfortable I made people in my home :(

[AgentZigzag]

DD1 has a shaking her hands thing which comes and goes, after we'd talked about why she might be doing it (it's usually when she's a bit stressed) I'd just tell her 'hands' when I see her doing it and it helps her notice.

There's nothing wrong with it, and it's good as an indicator of whether they're anxious and you can talk about that instead of the tic?

The only problem can be other peoples reaction, my uncle used to tease me calling me 'rubber gob' which made my mum furious that he was such a twat, and if the other DC notice at school they can be a bit 'insensitive' about it

[Whatdoyouthinkthen]

Rika how would it have made you feel if people had acknowledged the fact that you were doing it but in a smiley, accepting way?
I'm still torn between that and totally ignoring.