mum on benefits can afford to keep her dds 2 horses

[jugofwildflowers]

This is a lovely mum by the way. She has never married but been with the same partner for 25 years and they have 3 dc. He works and has another home but stays in family home often, although because she is 'single' and on benefits, she gets everything paid for and her dc have free school meals. I assumed that as the mum was on benefits, she wouldn't have much money.

They have 2 horses and she spends a lot of the time with them. We have a mortgage and after all the bills are paid we don't have enough to keep one let alone 2 horses! Comes across as sour grapes, doesn't it? Sorry but

[LEMONAIDE]

I get where you are coming from, horses are hardly a necessity but I suspect you are about to be flamed quite unpleasantly (good luck)

[Sirzy]

Sorry but if she is claiming as being single but having a partner living with her some of the time I would be reporting them as that's fraud

[MenopausalHaze]

Life. Who ever said it was fair?

[Lucyinthepie]

For all you know the father may pay for the upkeep of his daughter's hores.

[Lucyinthepie]

If she's committing benefit fraud it's a different issue in my opinion. You don't know who pays for the horses though, or how much they cost to keep, so I don't think that is any of your business.

[SuePurblybilt]

Maybe you should helpfully drop a list through her door of things you would find it acceptable for her to spend her money on?

[Olderyetwilder]

It is possible to keep horses quite cheaply, eg if they live out all year and go barefoot they won't cost a lot to keep, especially if she's looking after them herself rather than livery. Does she also have a huge TV? If not then that'll be how she affords the horses

[Hardgoing]

It is fraud, I live apart from my husband in the week, and wouldn't dream of claiming to be single, even though we often only spend one night together a week. But in my heart of hearts, I know we are together and have a joint attitude to money (and are married) so it's just not an option.

[MenopausalHaze]

"it is fraud" - and you know that how exactly hardgoing? Oh - you don't do you? Like the OP you are assuming. I suppose you stickybeakers can only hope that one day someone doesn't ASSUME something about you and dob you in for it without actually knowing.

[AVoidkaTheKillerZombies]

YANBU, but I would make sure you have you flame proof suit on.

[AVoidkaTheKillerZombies]

Of course its fraud. If you are in a relationship with someone for that long, even if you dont live together you are a couple.

[AKMD]

YANBU and you should shop her as a benefits cheat.

[TheRealTillyMinto]

Lucyinthepie if he regularly contributes to the household (to pay for the horses) then it should be declared.

[MrsRhettButler]

I thought someone had to live with you more than 3 nights per week for it to be classed as 'together'?

[saintlyjimjams]

Does she definitely own the horses? They're not a share or on loan or anything?

[NotaDisneyMum]

Who knows whose paying? My IL's pay for DSD equestrian activities - their mum pleads poverty too, so I'm sure people think the same about her!

[MrsRhettButler]

They may be a couple but if they don't live together then they clearly have two sets of bills to pay? Water rates, electric, rent or whatever, why should he pay her rent as well as his own?

[nickschic]

It always makes me a bit threads like this -why cant people mind their own business? Im not interested in knowing that people are fraudulently taking money from the system it doesnt mean id get any more nor does it mean my nanna would get her cataracts done any quicker.

As another poster pointed out who is to say someone else isnt funding the horses?

My dcs godmother has what I would say an affluent childhood with horses and trutex uniforms but on speaking to her you see she ate beans most nights cos her Mum had different priorities.

[MrsRhettButler]

The horses have nothing to do with the household though, would you be saying the same if her parents or in laws were paying for the horses?

[LEMONAIDE]

I did actually wonder if I knew this mum but the one I know is a bit of a nutter and you describe her as lovely so it cant be.

She has told me horses are "cheaper than you would think" and I think she budgets for them by not supplying the children with much in the way of out of school clothing, not washing them much and only feeding the children the minimum....I guess it depends on what your priorties in life are doesnt it

If her OH is regularly staying overnight in her home then I would suggest a gentle call to the benefit office/fraud, we had a similar situation here where a married couple maintained separate housing association homes - im guessing they were reported as photos were taken by what appeared to be an investigator and I think they lost benefits....still have both houses though

[wannaBe]

imho if you are deliberately living apart in order that one can claim to be single and can claim benefits then it is fraud, even if it isn't so in legal terms.

Why doesn't she have a job?

[TheRealTillyMinto]

why cant people mind their own business? because we taxpayers are paying for it!

[SingingTunelessly]

No comment on the benefits part but just to say I keep two horses at home like Jajas and there is no way the word 'cheaply' can ever be used to keep horses. Even kept barefoot at grass they still need hay in Winter and regular farrier visits, vets bills etc. Maybe her DP pays for them.