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To ask dn to wash his hands after his hands were down trousers and before touching dd ( 3 months)?

(33 Posts)
Familydilemma Mon 24-Oct-11 20:43:11

I am persona non gratis because I did. I asked really quietly and kindly. He is really sweet with dd, but she likes to grab his hands and put them in her mouth and I just couldn't see hands down trousers out again and onto dd without saying something. Aibu?

nethunsreject Mon 24-Oct-11 20:45:51

No, yanbu.

AgentZigzag Mon 24-Oct-11 20:45:59

Babies have to be exposed to some mankies at some point, but in this situation I probably would have done the same.

If somebody didn't like me saying it in a nice/gentle way, tough.

reallytired Mon 24-Oct-11 20:48:26

I can't see the problem. Its quite likely that your dn has worms if he is constantly scratching his bum. It is an absolute nightmare treating a baby for threadworm.

Did the mother object or was it the child?

Familydilemma Mon 24-Oct-11 20:49:35

The child got upset and I got a kind of telling off for embarrassing him.

SweatTart Mon 24-Oct-11 20:49:39

Do you really need to ask!??

grin

kakapo Mon 24-Oct-11 20:50:11

i wouldn't have a problem with this - even without touching your DD I think it would be reasonable to ask him to wash his hands!

kakapo Mon 24-Oct-11 20:51:06

sorry, cross post. Maybe he won't be so inclined to fiddle in public in future then wink

Familydilemma Mon 24-Oct-11 20:52:07

I don't think I really needed to ask as such - more tell someone! Was quite cross! Inwardly. Hope it's not worms-loomed more like a rearrangement of trouser contents!

Maisiethemorningsidecat Mon 24-Oct-11 20:53:09

I do this all the time in our house. DS1 is constantly fiddling about down there, rearranging himself and god knows what. Every time I catch him doing it I point him in the direction of the soap. Sweat, stale urine and public hair = yeuch.

DD and I manage to keep our hands out of our pants - funny that hmm

Maisiethemorningsidecat Mon 24-Oct-11 20:53:46

pubic even!

Familydilemma Mon 24-Oct-11 20:54:57

Thanks-one more for the list of things to teach ds before he has girlfriend/meets her parents. We have a while-he's only two!

HauntyMython Mon 24-Oct-11 20:55:24

YANBU out of interest how old is dn?

nbee84 Mon 24-Oct-11 20:58:33

I will grin if he's 25!

Familydilemma Mon 24-Oct-11 21:01:37

No-luckily he's only seven!

HauntyMython Mon 24-Oct-11 21:02:05

X post
He got upset about that, really? Can't imagine a 2 yr old being embarrassed.

HauntyMython Mon 24-Oct-11 21:03:02

Oh I see I misread sorry

Note to self don't read MN while scoffing popcorn

MrsStephenFry Mon 24-Oct-11 21:04:46

you should have said it to a parent to talk to him, of course you embarrassed and upset him. Seven year old boys are sensitive creatures.

Maisiethemorningsidecat Mon 24-Oct-11 21:14:54

She's his Aunt - close enough for this sensitive soul to hear it from!

MrsStephenFry Mon 24-Oct-11 21:16:02

apparently not, since op says he got upset.

BlathersFright Mon 24-Oct-11 21:20:15

Maybe what he needs is a little embarrassment to get him to leave it alone in public. 7 is old enough to know that's not on surely?

DS is 4 and knows not to play with it in public

Maisiethemorningsidecat Mon 24-Oct-11 21:20:54

Well, it's just one of those things he'll have to get used to, just as they have to learn not to scratch their bums/pick their noses/wipe snot on their sleeves etc. Parents can't be summoned (nor would I want to be) everytime they do something like this.

kakapo Mon 24-Oct-11 21:21:20

I'm sure the OP did it nicely. Maybe there wasn't time to involve his parents. That would seem like a mountain out of a molehill, because she'd have to quietly talk to the parent, with DN there, who would get up and take DN out. In the meantime DN has touched the baby and who knows what else!

Familydilemma Mon 24-Oct-11 21:22:43

I agree, mrsstephenfry, but I didn't say why specifically he should wash his hands and there wasn't time to ask mum. He isn't used to being challenged much and I wonder if that's where the embarrassment lay rather than realising the hands down trousers thing. There was a gap between the hands coming out of trousers and towards dd!

Maisiethemorningsidecat Mon 24-Oct-11 21:24:53

There will be no lasting damage to his confidence, I promise you! It was the only way you could have dealt with the situation.

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