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... to think some other mums are plain old mean girls?

(11 Posts)
SensitiveWaterSign Wed 19-Oct-11 13:24:57

I don't get some people! Had arranged a playdate for my DD (3) with neighbour's DD of same age as they get on really well at pre-school (according to teachers/observation etc!) - mentioned it to her and she claimed to have "forgotten" and was all funny about it ... hardly unusual, but why does it happen? Would normally simply avoid someone who doesn't want to play, and concentrate on my own friends (advice to DDs!) but this is hard as she is my neighbour, so unfortunately can't avoid as we walk same route to school ... Realise this sounds like a bit of a petty whinge, but my broader point is why are some other mums so plain old unfriendly? I do not want to be this woman's best friend, but our kids get on really well so why not make that connection? DP says think of her as difficult colleague.Have another really good neighbour/friend on same street - our older DDs friends, and we share pick-ups where poss, so know it's possible. Advice, please.

squeakyfreakytoy Wed 19-Oct-11 13:27:23

Maybe she is like many others and thinks "playdates" are a bloody ridiculous thing.

spanky2 Wed 19-Oct-11 13:28:01

Some women think they are still queen bee in the school playground. You are not the only one, it has happened to me. Even facebook has been infiltrated by the clique!

HecateGoddessOfTheNight Wed 19-Oct-11 13:31:37

Advice? - Leave it. Let the children enjoy playing with one another in school and develop friendships with other children outside of school.

Remain on nodding and good morning terms with your neighbour and don't worry about it.

when the children are older, if they want to hang around outside of school, they will do.

DuchessofMalfi Wed 19-Oct-11 13:34:58

You've got many years of cliques, snobs and snubs to come, I'm afraid. You'll find the ones you like and get on with, and ignore the rest. If you're lucky the ones you like will have the children that your DD likes too.

I belong to the drop and run theory when it comes to the school gate. That way you don't need to have anything to do with the ones you don't like, and you can meet up with the ones you do like outside school time.

cjbartlett Wed 19-Oct-11 13:36:31

maybe she's very shy?

PinotScreechio Wed 19-Oct-11 13:37:13

Learn now that you do not need to be mates with your childrens friends Mums. You just need to be polite and friendly.

Some people are a bit shy, some people are a bit mean. But life is long <man>

And what Hecate and Duchess said.

PinotScreechio Wed 19-Oct-11 13:37:40

ooh cj xpost about shy.

good minds.

SensitiveWaterSign Wed 19-Oct-11 13:39:16

Actually, agree myself with squeakyfreakytoy - really don't like term "playdate" - or even the concept especially ... just trying to reach out a bit ... might be symptom of being at- home-mother: need job ASAP!

Thanks for the other thoughts - common sense but good to hear

cat64 Wed 19-Oct-11 13:48:06

Message withdrawn

SensitiveWaterSign Wed 19-Oct-11 14:11:05

You're right - does sound a bit paranoid. She probably did actually forget. Only reason I put that is it was her who actually suggested the date ... think that was why I didn't get it

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