WIBU to sell DP's car

[DesperatelySeekingPomBears]

I'm a regular poster but got bored of my last SN plus it made it a little bit too easy for people I know IRL to work out it was me...

DP has a car. A very nice, two year old car. He bought it nearly new when we'd only been together around 6 months. I actively encouraged the purchase and, in fact, had a car of my own on finance at the time.

We then moved in together, and discovered that between us we were spending £800 per month on car finance. Obviously this was ridiculous and, having a hire purchase loan on my car, I planned to give it back to the finance company at the halfway point.

In the meantime, my job became a part time role with a quite noticeable drop in pay (went from earning £1100 a month after tax to £800), when I was able to voluntarily terminate my finance agreement it didn't really have the desired effect of leaving us any better off, as my pay drop meant the lack of finance just meant our finances remained about the same.

We're now three months from the arrival of DC1 touch wood and I've just worked out we spend almost £5000 per year on DPs car and that's just for finance and the service plan he pays monthly, not including road tax/diesel/insurance etc. I've halfheartedly floated the idea of him downgrading his car and he halfheartedly agrees to but then never speaks of it again until I bring it up again. I already feel bad enough that he earns substantially more than me (although our finances are 100% joint), but I just feelt like £5000 a year could make a huge difference to our lives.

Should I push it and risk him being potentially heartbroken at the loss of his baby? Or should I suck it up and continue forking over the money to the finance company every month for the sake of having a car that is under warranty and very reliable?

[HecateGoddessOfTheNight]

It's really something the two of you need to agree on.

Perhaps get all the figures down on a piece of paper and sit down together to work out your finances. cost of the car, cost of the alternatives.

Really - can you dictate to him? How would you feel if he attempted to dictate to you in a similar way?

No more 'halfheartedly' anything. Sit down. With the actual figures. Reach a firm agreement and act on it. Without delay!

[grovel]

is it a family car (ie will take a buggy, travel cot etc?).

[DesperatelySeekingPomBears]

grovel not really, it's a saloon. Once the buggy is in there there's not much room for anything else.

[grovel]

You may have an argument about practicality as well as cost. You won't believe the amount of clobber needed to take a baby away for, say, a week-end with grandparents.
For what it's worth my DH was quite good about swapping his sexy bachelor car when DS arrived. He didn't need a car to prove his virility any more.

[DesperatelySeekingPomBears]

I wish I could say it was some sort of young man's toy that he has at the moment but it's a Volvo of all things. I suppose if he were to argue back about practicality he could point out that I now have a large hatchback, that we bought outright, with more than enough room for everything for a family trip.

[grovel]

Ah. Didn't know about the hatchback.

[Secrecy]

I really wouldn't even look into it without having discussed it first. Maybe you could try presenting the facts and hoping that he will come to the conclusion that a cheaper car might be a good idea rather than telling him from the outset that his baby has to go?