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AIBU?

To want to have sex with nearly every man I know

65 replies

bucketbetty · 13/10/2011 21:44

I haven't had sex for years and years and years. I've now gotten to the stage of imagining myself having sex with nearly every man I know. It's just not right! I'm even imagining having sex with men nearly twice my age (and I'm no spring chicken). Jesus Joanney macaroni! I'm near having an orgasm when I walk past a man. I know some of you will say get a 'rabbit' but seriously, that's just not what I'm after. I want a 'real' man, just to smell him, hold his manly hand and (well, much more but I'm too polite to go into that). What on earth am I to do. I just want to stop sniffing every man I walk past and following their every magnetic move. Ideas anyone?

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dementedma · 13/10/2011 21:46

choose one you like and go for it!
Do you have an obliging friend?

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MooncupGoddess · 13/10/2011 21:46

Hmm. Try internet dating? You will be popular :)

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LeBOOOf · 13/10/2011 21:47

It's a bit out there, but have you thought about talking to one who fancies you and then perhaps shagging him?

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AuntiePickleBottom · 13/10/2011 21:48

as long as you protect yourself against STI, go for it :)

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bucketbetty · 13/10/2011 21:56

I've got it into my head that I've lost my touch. I used to be so good at flirting and having a couple of FB's on the go but gave up years ago. I find myself having entirely inappropriate thoughts about colleagues while I'm in meetings. I'm sure they can see what's going on in my head. These guys are quite dull, much older than me men. I'm also attracted to one of my male staff, who is very good looking but entirely inappropriate due to my status as his boss. OMG - I fear I'm going to sleep with someone and deeply regret it. I don't think I could do a one night stand with a stranger and I don't have any current FB's or male friends (otherwise I may have jumped them by now). I just want to touch a man in an intimate way (Jesus help me - I could potentially jump someone during a meeting - in the toilet or somewhere secluded just in case anyone spots me Grin)

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TallulahBug · 13/10/2011 21:58

Theres nothing wrong with the older man!!!! Bit of experience is always nice! [hwink]

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mistressploppy · 13/10/2011 21:59

Internet dating, like Mooncup says. Made for you Smile

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bucketbetty · 13/10/2011 22:02

Internet dating is strangers though. I don't think I could do it, hence the reason I haven't had sex for years. I need to rid myself of my morals. I've also developed a belly - doesn't do my confidence much good. I'm thinking about a pencil skirt and heels for tomorrow just in case any of the teachers are feeling a bit frisky at my DS's school. Smile I need to be relieved of my frustration and fast. [hgrin]

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bucketbetty · 13/10/2011 22:03

Oh, and I'll wear my big knickers to pull in my ever expanding belly. [hsmile]

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worraliberty · 13/10/2011 22:03

Wear a belly buster and try not to sit down Grin

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LynetteScavo · 13/10/2011 22:04

Erm...why haven't you had sex for years and years? Confused

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ChippingIn · 13/10/2011 22:05

If you are happy to wear a pencil skirt either your belly is not that much of a problem or you are just very confident Grin

Pub - pull - get over your morals Grin

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bucketbetty · 13/10/2011 22:07

Lynette, I'm single. No men, no sex! I've dedicated myself to my DS and not really had time for men folk, oh and I've developed this bizarre idea that only the man of my dreams will be my next lover. What a load of ole shit! I just don't meet men, or appropriate men. I don't go out much and when I do it's not on the pull. I've been quite barriered but I feel I've came out of myself now. Maybe I'm just going through a horny stage. Who knows, but I'm simply obsessed by sex and men at the mo. They're so mystical and magical (well to me anyway [hgrin] See how mad I've become!

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Selks · 13/10/2011 22:08

Lynette, it just works out like that for some people. Me too until recently (new relationship now, after a gap of four years partly by choice). No need for the weird face.

OP, I hear ya. I felt the same during my prolonged period of abstinence. I had a massage from my male osteopath and it was nearly too much for me! Ha ha.

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bucketbetty · 13/10/2011 22:09

Chippin, that just made me laugh out loud! I know, god I wish I could get over my morals, it's bloody killing me. [hgrin] I'm like a demented cat.

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bucketbetty · 13/10/2011 22:10

Selks, if I even smell a man my knees wobble and I feel warm in places that don't see any sunshine. [hgrin] A massage would see me in Holloway quick sharpish for crimes of the unnatural.

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Proudnreallyveryscary · 13/10/2011 22:12

I'm quite scared of you

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TallulahBug · 13/10/2011 22:15

Try the internet..there are websites for meeting ppl in your area! Theres also websites for men by the hour if your really that desperate! [hwink]

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bucketbetty · 13/10/2011 22:16

Proud, ha ha, seriously, men generally should be (are you male, single and would like to get to know an attractive female, sex deprived and well up for it?). I'm scared of myself. I'll get over it though. I always do. Mind you, I'm on the edge at the moment - much more so than usual. What the f* is a woman to do ? It's too much. I might die if a man even breaths on me. Actually I have a male colleague with serious halitosis - that's a definite no go. [hgrin]

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bucketbetty · 13/10/2011 22:17

Tallulah, I've thought about paying for it, then it feels like a business deal rather than a moral dilemma. I just don't think I should when I could easily get it for nothing if I really put my mind to it.

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worraliberty · 13/10/2011 22:17

Just walk into your local pub and announce "For my next trick I need a volunteer and a condom" Grin

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AnyPhantomFucker · 13/10/2011 22:18

oh, fgs, have a cup of tea

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AnyPhantomFucker · 13/10/2011 22:19

have you been popping uppers ?

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bucketbetty · 13/10/2011 22:19

Wine I've had 3 of these. Maybe tea will do the job.

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TallulahBug · 13/10/2011 22:19

Thats brilliant worraliberty!! OP that will definitely get you some! [hgrin]

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