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To not want my dd to apply to this 6th form

(21 Posts)
twoteens Thu 13-Oct-11 09:19:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

chopchopbusybusy Thu 13-Oct-11 09:26:11

Ask the school directly how important it is that DCs are baptised before 6 months. It may be that it's more important for entry at 11 than 6th form. You could also ask if the school sells second hand uniform. If your DD really wants to go there can she get a part time job and contribute to the costs?
If she still has others to visit she might change her mind anyway.
My DD would have automatically discounted any 6th form that required a uniform!

HengshanRoad Thu 13-Oct-11 09:53:08

Do you really want her to go to a school that has such ridiculous entry criteria? She had to have been baptised in the first six months? Do you honestly think your god cares about such crap? Send her to a sensible school with a non-religious agenda. She'll be much happier for it.

chopchopbusybusy Thu 13-Oct-11 09:59:29

Hengshanroad, if you read the OP you'll see that it's the DD that wants to go. The OP would prefer her not to, but not for religious reasons.
I imagine they stipulate the timing of being baptised to prevent an influx of DCs who were baptised aged 10.

lesley33 Thu 13-Oct-11 10:16:58

I suspect the baptism before 6 months is to screen out those "finding a faith" to get into a school. Talk to the school about this and explain that you are a parctising catholic and have been for years and years - and ask if this 6 month rule will count against you.

Talk to your DD and say that you will support her to apply to this school, but the baptism thing may count against her and you couldn't afford the school trips. But I wouldn't encourage her not to apply on the basis she might not get in. Just warn her that she may not and if she does she won't be able to go on any/many trips.

But she is old enough to take this on board and to go on the basis of a good education. She can always do some part time work for money for school trips and there may be a hardship fund - many schools have them.

I would look at 2nd hand uniforms, but tbh I personally wouldn't want, if possible, this to stop her going to a good school.

tryingtoleave Thu 13-Oct-11 10:35:26

I would think your priest would write a letter saying that you are practicing Catholics and that would be sufficient. And I'm sure you could get a second hand uniform. Don't deny your dd this opportunity without calling the school and talking to them.

LizzieMo Thu 13-Oct-11 11:03:56

That is a harsh rule about baptism in the first six months. My child was baptised at seven months because she was in & out of hospital up until then. I would have been furious if she had been denied a place at her school because of that!!! Is your DD currently in a catholic school? In my experience catholic schools like to see a committment to catholic education, they will prioritise children who have already been to catholic primary & secondary . Not to say you should not apply if she hasn't. I would also ring them to discuss the baptism issue, get your priest on side too. Most priests will support parents/children who request a catholic education.

fraktious Thu 13-Oct-11 11:57:22

We'd also fail that, although that would be because I won't have DS baptised in a random church we have no real connection to - he'll be done at 8 months in a local when not posted overseas church which means a lot to us.

I suspect there would be exceptions.

ripstheirthroatoutliveupstairs Thu 13-Oct-11 12:07:31

[smug[ my DD would get in. She was baptised at 4 weeks, abroad and goes to catholic school now.
OP, FWIW I agree with the others, it's to stop people discovering their faith in the lead up to school admissions.
Speak to the school and ask for advice. good luck.

slavetofilofax Thu 13-Oct-11 12:13:18

It would be wrong to try and stop her from applying, but she is old enough to all the facts about this school, so she knows that she might not get in because of when she was baptised.

She is also old enough to know that she will have to help fund te uniform, and any trips that she wants to go on. If she is aware that she might not get to take full advantage of the trips on offer and she still wants to apply, then it is your job to support her.

ripstheirthroatoutliveupstairs Thu 13-Oct-11 12:19:00

Mind you, she'd probably be thrown out if they knew I supported abortion and contraceptive choices for women
[non catholic mother]

duvetdayplease Thu 13-Oct-11 12:26:31

Hello, how lovely that your daughter is so involved in and motivated about her education. I was such a twat at her age, I wouldn't have even thought of applying somewhere different.

I think she's old enough to make her own choices (within limits) and if she really wants to go then I would try to support her. Speak to the head as others suggest and also talk to her about uniform cost - she might have to accept she needs to have fewer gifts at christmas or whatever as a result, or as prev poster said to help with the cost.

I don't agree with faith schools but whilst they exist then we have to work with them and if it is a good school then your daughter has as much right to apply as anyone.

But she sounds a credit to you, wherever she goes I hope she does well.

5Foot5 Thu 13-Oct-11 13:27:38

Wow I am surprised at the 6 month rule. DD went to RC primary and also attends RC secondary and, although they wanted to see her baptismal certifcate when she applied, nobody said anything about a time limit

As it happens she was about 10 months when we got her baptised because FIL had had a major operation shortly after she was born and wasn't well enough to travel for months and we didn't want him to miss out.

MamaChoo Thu 13-Oct-11 13:52:15

I think dissuading her from applying is a great way to encourage her to set the bar low and back out at the first sign of adversity. I'm sorry but I thhink this would be a truly dreadful example to set a clearly talented and motivated girl. Sit down with her, establish what you BOTH believe to be the barriers and then discuss how you might resolve them (eg second hand uniform, talking to priest etc). Please please encourage her to think of ways to achieve highly, not give up a potentially amazing opportunity because of an issue that might not even exist.

twoteens Thu 13-Oct-11 16:44:54

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HappyJoy Thu 13-Oct-11 16:48:36

how do they want you to prove it

we have a baptism certificate but i bet if i said we had lost it, we would be hard pressed to get a copy

twoteens Thu 13-Oct-11 17:02:09

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GrimmaTheNome Thu 13-Oct-11 17:14:38

I can't believe they're needing a pre-6 month baptism certificate for 6th form entry. I mean, at that age isn't it more up to your DD to say for herself if she's a practising Catholic not be dependent on what you may or may not have done in her early infancy? confused

lesley33 Thu 13-Oct-11 18:45:18

Ok if she isn't allowed a part time job I would still support her to apply but find a way of managing with her uniform - second hand or less presents at xmas/birthday. She is obviously very well motivated educationally which is a real credit to you, so I would just explain that you may not be able to afford to pay for school trips. They may have a hardship fund, but even if not, it sounds like the education side is the most important part to her.

I know they said that the 6 month baptism was a strict criteria, but your DD sounds very mature - so I wouldn't put her off applying, but be honest with her and say this silly rule unfortunately might stop her getting a place. But its not a reason not to try and get a place.

lesley33 Thu 13-Oct-11 18:48:11

Not going on trips might not be great, but she isn't a young child where I think this might be a major issue. TBH I hated my 6th form, but got through it because I was motivated and wanted to go to uni. And for a very good education, it is worth it.

incognitofornow Thu 13-Oct-11 18:48:54

Message withdrawn

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