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to sell clothes that DP has promised to my sister?

(46 Posts)
pantspantspants Wed 12-Oct-11 10:59:10

I have DD1 (nearly 4) and DD2 (2.5) and newborn DS. DS is our last so I plan to sell my baby girls clothes to make some money so I can buy DS clothes and in turn sell these for bigger clothes for all DC.

All baby girls clothes washed, ironed and bagged ready to be sold. I know Im not going to make alot but anything will her the clothing fund.

Sister has now announced they are trying for DC3, they have DD and DS already. They are well off, 6 bed house, good cars, very well paid jobs. DP then offered these clothes to them.
She still has her baby clothes for both DC so, don't know why she needs mine. Or why DP offered them.

My sister always takes but never gives. she expects me to have her DC at the drop of a hat, leaves DD with me with no nappy and not really potty trained while I was heavily pregnant. expects me to feed DC when she turns up with them.

Anyway after the offer I told DP how annoyed I was as I really needed the money, he already knew my plans, also admitted that as sister didn't offer for me to borrow her baby boy clothes so I have brought new, I didn't see why we should give her extra baby girl clothes for a baby not even conceived yet. we agreed not to mention it to sister again and if she did we would tell her that we were selling the baby stuff. and offer her to buy any she wanted.

had she been in need i would have given her the clothes happily but she's not and already has clothes.

So this next visit she notices clothes, in DD2 bedroom and said oh I'll take them now shall I? To which I said actually we now need to sell the clothes but she can look through a buy any that she likes. She shrugs and says no I've got clothes already just fancied some more incase we have a girl. Now she keeps on commenting on DS clothes saying she can't wait until he's out of them and then she can have them. I commented on yep I'll be selling them too when the time comes. she then exploded saying she had been promised clothes and we couldn't take the promise back. I told her that DP hadn't understood my need to sell them to be able to buy more clothes for DC and if I don't sell them we would struggle to find the money else where. I apologised for the confusion and explained DP shouldn't of offered the clothes.

She then said I should give her the clothes as they were promised and if I needed extra money I could clean for them as they are needing a cleaner. She has just left I feel very bad for the clothes but also because we work hard for the little money we have and Im stretched looking after 2 preschoolers and a newborn while DP is away alot, can't be her cleaner.

so, should I give her the clothes that she doesn't need? Because of DP not thinking. or go with my original plan? She can't see why I want to sell the clothes as she can offer me this "job" (she has a history of getting my other sisters to do jobs round the house but never paying them for).

sorry for caps/typos im on my phone.

NinkyNonker Wed 12-Oct-11 11:03:28

Sod that, YANBU.

IAmOptimusPrime Wed 12-Oct-11 11:03:50

No don't give her the clothes. You bought them so you do what you want with them. My sister has a ds who is a year older than mine. She does give me clothes he has grown out of but I don't ask for them or expect them but am very grateful if something comes my way.

If she needed to sell them to make money I wouldn't be cross as they are hers.

TheControversialJessie Wed 12-Oct-11 11:03:57

Go with original plan.

Tell your sister again that you didn't "promise".

By the way, is all this happening on facebook, by any chance?

HellonHeels Wed 12-Oct-11 11:04:03

Your sister sounds quite rude and even aggressive: "exploded". You have explained and apologised to her. Sell the clothes!

Oh and please do not clean for her! If you actually want a cleaning job, go elsewhere. From what you've said, I imagine you would either be taken advantage of or she would fall out with you over it.

wineandroses Wed 12-Oct-11 11:06:47

Good grief, what a cheeky cow. Simply tell her no, you're selling the clothes and as you've already explained why (you need the money), refuse to discuss it further. And tell her to do her own cleaning.

TheControversialJessie Wed 12-Oct-11 11:07:32

^ What HellonHeels said.

She obviously readily takes advantage of family.

confusedpixie Wed 12-Oct-11 11:08:36

YANBU. Tell her to sod off.

ENormaSnob Wed 12-Oct-11 11:08:58

Tell the selfish bitch to fuck off.

Fucking stingy cow she is.

NorfolkBroad Wed 12-Oct-11 11:11:19

pants PLEASE do not give in to her or clean for her fgs!!!!!!! She is being absolutely outrageous. Even if your DP did say she could have the clothes, you have changed your's not a crime, from what you say she doesn't need them anyway. YANBU stick to your guns. I get absolutely sick of hearing well off people acting as though they are poor! Some of my family do it too!

Sirzy Wed 12-Oct-11 11:11:53

When I saw the thread title I was going to say yabu or to spilt the clothes.

However, having read the thread tell her to sod off!

Sirzy Wed 12-Oct-11 11:12:55

Tell her she can buy the clothes of you

NorfolkBroad Wed 12-Oct-11 11:13:47

In fact I recently gave some really lovely clothes to a friend of mine who seemed to be having a tough time instead of selling them. Next time I saw her she told me about all the lovely things she had just bought from the new Boden catalogue!

TheControversialJessie Wed 12-Oct-11 11:15:59

If she says they've been "promised" again, tell her: "No, my DP suggested it to you as a plan, and then he checked it with me and we discussed giving our property to you. Unfortunately, it's not a workable plan.

So, kindly fuck off with this entitlement complex you have. You can't demand gifts from other people."

RnB Wed 12-Oct-11 11:16:36

Ooh what a nasty cow your sister is. Under no circumstances clean for her or give her any clothes.

CaptainNancy Wed 12-Oct-11 11:17:18

Don't you dare give them to her!
If you need to sell them, sell them, but not to her!

WilsonFrickett Wed 12-Oct-11 11:17:47

So she wants your clothes for a baby that hasn't even been conceived yet, or am I reading that wrong?

Either way, tell her no. And YANBU.

NorfolkBroad Wed 12-Oct-11 11:18:02

ThecontroversialJessie so well put! Must remember that line!

Ghoulwithadragontattoo Wed 12-Oct-11 11:20:01

She sounds like a cow especially as her baby isn't even conceived yet. If you wanted to you could do a clothes swap with her your baby girl clothes for her baby boy clothes. I did this with a friend who has a boy the same age as my DD then a girl the same age as my DS. It worked really well and all those clothes have now been passed on free to other people to use with their younger babies. But my friend was nice and it worked for both of us. You shouldn't do it if your sister is always so unpleasant as she seems here.

WineOhWhy Wed 12-Oct-11 11:20:02

As a compromise you could offer to swap them for her DS's old clothes. Bit hard for her to justify why that is not a reasonable proposition!

SjuperWereWolef Wed 12-Oct-11 11:21:17

do not give in to her! what a nasty entitled cow she sounds. sorry i know she is your sister but for fecks sake, to talk to you like that she must have <mn cliche alert> some serious entitlement issues.

gargh she's riled me up the twunt.

BabyDubsEverywhere Wed 12-Oct-11 11:21:32

She sounds like a toxic bitch tbh, I'd drop her, sister of not!

TheControversialJessie Wed 12-Oct-11 11:22:52


I'd like to thank everyone who has ever pissed me off, and the lovely ladies and gentlemen at MN, for helping me develop my [blah, blah, blah]

<bursts into tears>
<is escorted supportively off-stage>

whatdoiknowanyway Wed 12-Oct-11 11:24:06

shock that she suggested you clean for her.
Sell the clothes!

AKMD Wed 12-Oct-11 11:27:22

What. The. Heck. How dare she demand clothes from you and try to make you clean for her! Are you her slave? Her personal charity? shock

If you give her those clothes or even contemplate cleaning for her, I will personally flame every post you ever make on MN again shock

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