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I probably ABU... My boss

(16 Posts)
Angel786 Tue 11-Oct-11 12:07:34

is a nightmare. Lazy, two faced, undermines me. I'm on mat leave, met her for a drink a month or two ago and at the end of the conversation she tells me she's taking away my management responsibilities so she will manage the team I used to.

I used to be a dream employee - v diligent, enthusiastic, hard worker, motivated etc. Since my boss joined a year ago I have lost all motivation. She cut me out of team communications while I've been on mat leave by removing me from the standard team mailing list (which no other team has done with their members).

Two weeks ago I had an email from my mat cover asking for help on something for work. I helped, a bit (enough), not as much as I would usually as I'm pissed off with the boss.

Now my boss has emailed me today asking for help on something-else.

AIBU to ignore it. I don't want to reply (other than perhaps saying fuck off which isn't a good idea- why should I spend my mat leave sending work emails when it isn't appreciated. She's taken away my responsibilities now she wants me to do (the boring) parts of her job for her!?


Sorry for bad language.

squeakytoy Tue 11-Oct-11 12:10:32

I am not sure that it is legal for her to change your responsibilities permanently. Fine that someone has to do it while you are off, but you should expect to go back to the same role that you left.

As for dealing with work emails, reply that you are on mat leave and unable to help. You are well within your rights to do that.

duvetdayplease Tue 11-Oct-11 12:14:50

Hi, I think by the sounds of it YANBU but your boss IBU!

She is not treating you fairly and I would be thinking about taking this further. However the route you take is dependent on the nature of your organisation - if you work in public sector then maybe different to private, smaller companies.

My understanding is you are not obliged to do any work at all while on maternity leave so no need to help out on anything (doesn't mean you don't want to but it is not acceptable to have pressure put on you). You also can't have your role just downgraded as that is a change to your job description?

I could be wrong as I worked for yonks in the very procedural public sector so every time I got a new pen it had to go thru the union.

I would post in legal and see if anyone can help you there.

Sorry this is happening, she sounds like a shitty boss.

Icelollycraving Tue 11-Oct-11 12:15:40

This manager is on v dodgy ground legally. Also,you are well within your rights to reply that you are on mat leave & cannot help.

redskyatnight Tue 11-Oct-11 12:15:41

If you are on maternity leave I would have thought it was fairly normal to not get work related emails so I wouldn't have a problem with being taken off the team mailing list (do you really have time to read the mails anyway?)

You would be within your rights to point out that you are on maternity leave and won't answer work queries - however if they are infrequent and not time consuming (which sounds like the case) it would be showing willing to do so.

You have a legal right to go back into an equivalent level job - but if your manager chooses to restructure responsibilities they can do so (with both my DC I went back into an entirely different job after maternity leave due to the way the team had been restructured).

carabos Tue 11-Oct-11 12:20:49

Your boss must keep you included in team emails as it is a requirement that you be kept up to date with activities - whether you read them or not is entirely up to you. You should insist that she reinstates the contact and ensures that you are forwarded all the missing correspondence.

In terms of helping out, you are absolutely not required to do this - again its up to you, but they shouldn't really be initiating contact with you other than on matters directly related to your mat leave.

In respect of changing your job description, you will need to speak to HR about that and ask for the proper process to be followed - meeting you informally for a drink is not an appropriate way to discuss any changes with you.

ScaredTEECat Tue 11-Oct-11 12:29:28

You actually aren't suppose to work at all when on ML except for 'Keep In Touch' Days. These are limited to, I think, 5 or 10.

If she wants you to work, then she needs to pay you for the time you are working, above and beyond your Maternity Pay.

You do not have to return to the same job, but an equal job. If the company is restructuring in general, then you can be restructured.

LadyClariceCannockMonty Tue 11-Oct-11 12:29:58

Nothing new to add, I'm afraid, but I agree with everything carabos says above, especially the informal setting for talking about changes to your role!

Angel786 Tue 11-Oct-11 12:38:16

Thanks all. Think I will just ignore it.

As I'm due back in a month and a half I think she's trying to make me feel included but it's too little too late. She can easily find the answers to what she's asked me by asking another team member or looking at the files ( I showed her where everything was when she joined).

As I've taken a year mat leave I think she can restructure as I'm not guaranteed my old job but an equivalent.

I just don't want to the boring technical bits of her job while she's taken away the management which I used to enjoy...

thinNigella Tue 11-Oct-11 13:02:25

This happened to me. I worked so so hard. New manager came in, couldn't stand him, didnt' help he is chauvenist sexist pig, ('women with children really are far better at home, Nigella', 'yes but unfortunately the mortgage dictates that I work FT')
I hated it when I went back, he did everythig he could to oust me. Sadly it worked, and two jobs later I'm in a better company with a better team of colleagues. My work is fun and I love it. So, not regrets - but I'm still bitter. I hate him with a passion, still and it's 3 years ago now!!

Still, in my leaving speech where he dragged in colleagues I'd worked with closely for 10 years, who knew I'd moved the business from £13M to £18mn in 5 years, with only a budget of £220k and a sales team of 4, he showed what a tw4t he is. His speech consisted of everything the business had done - leaving out that part about the hard work in creating the direction for the business. Unfortunately the people in the room had all been part of the projects I was driving at the time and all knew it was down to me. He lost respect from lots of people that day, serves him right.

Like I say, I'm still bitter, yet on a day to day basis, happier.

Angel786 Tue 11-Oct-11 15:36:34

ThinNigella. Sounds like we could have worked for the same company our Euro Sales MD sounds like your old boss!

I do understand my bosses nasty behaviour as initially she was brought into replace me when I resigned but then I stayed (sorry not drip feeding but the situations q long and complex) so I know she's fighting to establish her leadership blah blah but treating me like shit is not going to make me want to help her in any form! Initially she raved on about how great I was and she didn't wAnt to change a thing / step on my toes and then she says she'll take over managing the juniors.

Either I suck it up and ignore her for a year / two and get mat leave benefits for second baby or I vote with my feet (but prob won't get as good a package elsewhere).

KatAndKit Tue 11-Oct-11 15:41:02

No, you can take 12 months maternity leave and have the right to go back to your old job. If you negotiate a longer career break then they can change your role but since you are going back within the 12 months you are entitled to your job back as it was.

blackteaplease Tue 11-Oct-11 15:52:40

KatandKit, I'm not sure that's correct. Your job is protected for 6 months, then they can move you to an equivalent position if necessary.

Angel786 Tue 11-Oct-11 16:06:49

I heard that too. If you go back after 6 mths you're guaranteed your old role but if a year and your job is no longer available then they can offer an alternative with similar responsibilities and pay.

The stupid thing is I'm now still head of dept but not managing the dept!

KatAndKit Thu 13-Oct-11 05:13:07

This seems to show you are right. If you take the unpaid three months at the end then they are allowed to mess with your job description. But your pay and conditions should be the same surely

Angel786 Thu 13-Oct-11 11:27:36

Thanks Kat. Am thinking of alternative strategies... wonder how many sickies one could pull before you hit the radar...

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