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To be cross with my au pair?

(61 Posts)
MrsWentworth Tue 11-Oct-11 10:38:28

We have a Polish au pair, who gets my DD1 and DD2 ready for school while I get baby DD3 sorted out. It has been very cold here over the past couple of days and I asked her to make sure the DDs had their hats on. I had to go to the gym early today, so the au pair had to take the children to school. She has access to one of our cars in theory, but doesn't drive, so had to take them on the bus.

When I got back from the gym, the hats were still on the table in the hall, so she had obviously forgotten to put them on. AIBU to want to send her back to Poland?

MollyintheMoon Tue 11-Oct-11 10:40:00

Erm of course YABU. She forgot.

TheRealMrsHannigan Tue 11-Oct-11 10:40:16

YABU, surely you are not immune to forgetfulness yourself?

It's not exactly Arctic temperatures just yet, I am sure they will be fine.

Scholes34 Tue 11-Oct-11 10:41:08

Not unreasonable at all. Send her back to Poland immediately, give up going to the gym and make sure your children always remember their hats. It's very cold on the bus.

MrsWentworth Tue 11-Oct-11 10:41:15

DD1 gets bad earache in cold weather - which au pair knows.

Laquitar Tue 11-Oct-11 10:42:42

Are you in UK? Its not that cold.

MrsWentworth Tue 11-Oct-11 10:43:35

Well, in the extreme reaches of the UK - but it feels cold to me.

PenguinsAreThePoint Tue 11-Oct-11 10:44:00

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mumto2andnomore Tue 11-Oct-11 10:44:01


BatsUpMeNightie Tue 11-Oct-11 10:44:29

Send her back to Poland? I think you should send her to the North Pole. That'll teach her!

YABU but that doesn't really apply in a wind up situation!

GypsyMoth Tue 11-Oct-11 10:45:12

Good god!!

This IS a wind up isn't it!??hmm

slavetofilofax Tue 11-Oct-11 10:45:18

I forgot to give ds2 his packed lunch this morning.

Perhaps I should bugger off to Poland too?

(ps, ds2 will eat today, I have just delivered his lunch to the office)

natwebb79 Tue 11-Oct-11 10:45:37

If you're that concerned why don't you make sure they have their hats rather than flit off to the gym? What is this, Upstairs bloody Downstairs?!

PerryCombover Tue 11-Oct-11 10:45:44

This has to do with control and knowing your place.
You employ her. You have told her what to do. She has disobeyed your commands
Punish her for her disobedience.

<Also when has not having a license ever prevented someone from driving? How inconvenient>

KurriKurri Tue 11-Oct-11 10:46:01

My God, she sounds absolutely hopeless, I don't know how you cope.

A tip regarding hats though, - I was prone to ear ache as a child, so my Mother stapled my hat to my head. HTH.

worraliberty Tue 11-Oct-11 10:46:25

Yes send her back immediately and get Mr Sheen in to do the job

Rosa Tue 11-Oct-11 10:47:11

She forgot- she had 2 children to get ready and get out of the door in time to catch the bus , you had gone to the gym ( with baby 3 ? ) or did she have the baby as well ? Maybe next time if it is so vital shove the hats in the arms of the coats as routine so they are there in the morning.

dickiedavisthunderthighs Tue 11-Oct-11 10:47:33

"I had to go to the gym today" erm no you CHOSE to go to the gym today.
In the meantime your au pair is frantically gathering children and bags and trying not to miss the bus, and you're doing your nut because she forgot the hats?

I'd imagine Poland is looking pretty damn attractive to the poor girl right now.

ThreeTrickPony Tue 11-Oct-11 10:48:09

I would not tolerate this from a servant, either.
You exercise routine is critical, too. You should be able to go to the gym and abdicate all responsibility for your children to a (presumably young) immigrant.

You really cannot get decent staff these days.

CristinadellaPizza Tue 11-Oct-11 10:48:11

If she doesn't drive, then she doesn't have access to your car does she? What a weird thing to even mention

Even in Stornaway, it's 12 degrees. Don't be so silly.

And you didn't have to go to the gym early, you chose to

pictish Tue 11-Oct-11 10:48:17

Yabu. Everyone forgets things sometimes.
Especially if they're late for getting to the all important gym.

kslatts Tue 11-Oct-11 10:48:46

YABU and I assume this is a wind up.

Scholes34 Tue 11-Oct-11 10:48:48

If it were imperative they wore their hats, would you have been better to cancel your gym session to ensure they were worn, or would that have been a logistical nightmare?

How old are the DCs? Are they at an age where they can take responsibility for remembering to pick up their hat from the table, especially when the oldest knows the consequences of not wearing one in cold weather?

BatsUpMeNightie Tue 11-Oct-11 10:49:03

Also the Polish tend to know what really cold is and she probably thinks you're stark raving insane to want them sent out in hats when it really isn't cold yet!

pictish Tue 11-Oct-11 10:49:10

Agree that this is a wind up btw.

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