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to doubt that the family members of people employed in the building trade have a shorter life span than the population in general ...

(12 Posts)
babybarrister Mon 10-Oct-11 11:27:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

slavetofilofax Mon 10-Oct-11 11:34:38

I have been to three funerals in the space of 8 months in the past. It does happen.

But I'm not sure there is much you can do. maybe you could 'kill it with kindness' and guilt them in to not lying if that's what they are doing. There is something particularly sick about lying about family death.

Ask them details and be all understanding. If they are telling the truth they might appreciate it, and if they're not, they might realise what an awful thing they are lying about.

squeakytoy Mon 10-Oct-11 11:34:43

I have a small family but my Mum, FIL and a very close family friend all died within the same 6 month period.. so it is possible.

coccyx Mon 10-Oct-11 11:36:42

possible, but not very likely

GrownUpNow Mon 10-Oct-11 11:39:10

My DP is in the trade and it does happen, as a large catholic Irish/Scottish family with several aunts and uncles on either side, all those cousins... there's constant christenings, weddings and funerals.

CogitoErgoSometimes Mon 10-Oct-11 11:43:57

YANBU to be suspicious. But give them the benefit of the doubt about funeral #3 and start turning up the pressure to up their work-rate from now on. If there are any extra payments due, hold onto them if there hasn't been enough progress. Set a few deadlines. Get some commitments about key dates. Get on their backs, basically.

I watched two building projects this year - one next door and one across the road. The ones next door were there at 8.30 sharp every day and they worked like stink, weekends, bank holidays the lot. The ones across the road kept disappearing, swinging the lead. Difference was that the team next door had a very good project manager cracking the whip...

AMumInScotland Mon 10-Oct-11 11:48:02

Maybe you could focus on asking them how they plan to catch up with the work? I don't think I'd challenge their version of events, but if they are meant to be working to a deadline, or were expecting to be finished by x date, then its fair to ask how they plan to get it back on track after the unfortunate missed days.

Builders often have more than one job on the go at a time, and will be dividing their attention between finishing your job, starting the next one, going back to fix snags on something that was meant to be done, etc. So just make it clear that delaying your job isn't going to be the easy option which you won't argue about.

beakinthebeeswax Mon 10-Oct-11 11:52:37

Grownupnow your DP is same as mine, He an Irish Catholic bulider and we also attend a large amount of family functions, as on a religious level we are expected to. He works very hard and is honest with his customers.

senua Mon 10-Oct-11 12:03:10

I think "kill with kindness" is the way to go. Have they specified which one of the family has died: is it the same granny every time?hmm Ask after the family - how are they coping etc - it is very strssful and time-consuming to remember which bit of which lie you told to which people so that might put a stop to it.grin

babybarrister Mon 10-Oct-11 13:23:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

spiderpig8 Mon 10-Oct-11 13:42:58

make better tea and buy nicer biscuits wink

spiderpig8 Mon 10-Oct-11 13:43:55

in answer to your question . Even if they have a shorter life span they won't die any more often!

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