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to think this person was just having a dig at me, by saying "i wish i had nothing better to do than spend all day making a pumpkin" "chance would be a fine thing"

(72 Posts)
carriedababi Fri 07-Oct-11 16:05:13

ok, so dds school the children are making pumpkins for halloween, so as they are still doing mornings a few of us got together this pm and carved pumpkins, it was a lovely afternoon and we made the pumpkins, gave them silly names, all the children [about 10] played really nicely, us mums had a chat and a bit of a laugh so we had a really nice time anyway on the way home from this friends house, it was school run time, bumped into a friend, who i've only known for 1 year, more of a friend of a friend but anyway.

but when we bumped into each other she seemed a bit off, said to me, "oh i wish i had nothing better to do allday other than make pumpkins"

and then something along the lines of "chance will be a fine thing"

its not as if we have spend the whole day making them, they took aout 30mins the rest of the time then children played

do you think she was having a pop? it was just her maner didn;t seem quite right, she wasn't left out of the gruop or anything as her child is at ft school.

i think shes not that happy in her job, but shes the one with a 500K house and 2 massive 4x4s, shes making her choices in life as we all are, she could easily downsize as you can buy house for half that round here.
but i don;t make digs at her.

anyway what do you think, was she having a pop?

If she's normally nice she might have been having a bad day and it all came out wrong.

If she says things like that quite often then it might be a dig at you.

aldiwhore Fri 07-Oct-11 16:09:16

Meh, let it slide, I turned up on the school run the other day in different clothes from the morning, with make up on and my hair blow dried... I was met with 'you obviously have too much time on your hands' by a few people. Meh.

Actually it doesn't matter what my 'reasons' were for doing so, but DH had a day off, and we'd been in bed most of the afternoon (my youngest was with my mum)... lol Next time I'm going to turn up bedraggles and smelling of sex.

Ignore ignore ignore, they're just unhappy martyrs, or just using a throw away line that hasn't occured to them might make the other person growl.

proudfoot Fri 07-Oct-11 16:16:05

She probably is trying to have a dig but that's her problem - sounds like a lovely afternoon to me so just ignore!

carriedababi Fri 07-Oct-11 16:16:46

it does just confirm to me that you must do whatever makes you happy as i'm sure someone will try and have a pop at you whatever you do, so you might as well do whatever you like and what makes you happy.

shes not really had a dig at me before, well if this was one,so perhaps should give the benefit of the doubt, but she can be the miserable one in the group.

carriedababi Fri 07-Oct-11 16:18:35

aldiwhore, i totally get what you mean about what you wear, it's flabbergasting to me, as to why anyone should comment on what other are wearing, but it happens all the time.

i mean im the same person if im wearing jeams and trainers or a nice dress.

carriedababi Fri 07-Oct-11 16:19:45

i think it was just the phrasing of "nothing better to do" that got me.

if she'd had said oh i would have loved to spend the afternoon doing that, it wouldn't have come across as dig like.

Proudnreallyveryscary Fri 07-Oct-11 16:20:39


worraliberty Fri 07-Oct-11 16:21:28

It comes across as total jealousy to me

carriedababi Fri 07-Oct-11 16:21:58

also the other day dd had said on collection, are we making pizzas for tea tonight mum, i said yes thats right dd.

someone chipped in, oh clearly too much time on your hands!

ffs i bet if it was a supermarket pizza, some other fucker would be sneering at that too!

you just can't win!!!

Fixture Fri 07-Oct-11 16:22:58

YANBU. I wouldn't be too pleased if someone said that to me. Unfortunately her comment implies "your life is easy and you are lazy!"

I suppose it would be unhelpful to say "Yes, it's great. I please myself all day and just play, spend money and shop. I love my life."

Tchootnika Fri 07-Oct-11 16:26:00

It does sound like a dig - 'nothing better to do'...!
Could have been that she was having a bad day - but I hope she apologises if so, she must know she was being really rude.
That said, carrie, you have to ignore sour grapes-type remarks, don't you? Otherwise your bonfire's always gonna be someone else's pisspot, IYSWIM...
(Which reminds me, do we get any seasonal emoticons for Hallowe'en, anyone know? A pumpkin grin would be nice, no?)

carriedababi Fri 07-Oct-11 16:27:32

hecate do you think it was a dig then?

i don't really know what my reply was, something along the lines of all the children have had a little get together....

probably didn't make any sense!

Yes. I do. I think it was bitchy.

which is why, if you were childish like me, you would reply that next time grin

WhereYouLeftIt Fri 07-Oct-11 16:29:24

^"i think shes not that happy in her job, but shes the one with a 500K house and 2 massive 4x4s, shes making her choices in life as we all are, she could easily downsize as you can buy house for half that round here.
but i don;t make digs at her."

Well, that is a bit of a dig at her, just not to her face. You disapprove of her conspicuous consumption.

Didn't you start a thread about something similar yesterday, saying that it sickened you that Hilary Devay had spent all that money on clothes? Perhaps with such a firm opinion on flashy possessions, is it possible that you've said something or had a facial expression that has made your disapproval of her lifestyle apparent? Her dig might be more of a retort, OP.

carriedababi Fri 07-Oct-11 16:34:02

i say alot of things on here that i would never say in rl.

hear you speak the truth about your opinions regardless, in rl you tread carefull as to not offend anyone.

knowing when to holdyour thoughts to yourself.

i've never commented on her lifestyle whatsoever
to either her or anyone else we both know in rl.

carriedababi Fri 07-Oct-11 16:35:57

think i may have said something like we have had a lovely afternoon hecate.

its weird when someone you dont really expect to catch you off guard like that, you can't really remember your reaction.

Hullygully Fri 07-Oct-11 16:37:31

definitely having a pop

I'd burn her house down

lesley33 Fri 07-Oct-11 16:37:49

It sounds to me as if she is jealous.

NorfolkBroad Fri 07-Oct-11 16:40:13

Yes, a bitchy little comment. I agree. Not the end of the world but annoying.

carriedababi Fri 07-Oct-11 16:43:17

so shes not really a friend then is she.

hmm maybe have to beware this one then, as shes sort of in a circle of friends im in too.
thats how i know her.

Fixture Fri 07-Oct-11 16:48:46

Smile and make a point of going to say hello next time you see her. Be nice and polite and she won't have any ammunition.

BikingViking Fri 07-Oct-11 16:50:05

next time you just need to answer "nope, just 24 hours a day like everyone else"

main point is, you had a nice time with the kids and some others

SixtyFootDoll Fri 07-Oct-11 16:51:01

Maybe she was miffed that she didn't get invited?

Your tone sounds as petty as hers really.

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