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to just want my children to get dressed?

(29 Posts)
joshandjamie Mon 03-Oct-11 16:37:18

Boys. Aged 7 and 6. They don't even have to get their sodding clothes out. I put them out because I've long since given up that battle. All they have to do is put their clothes on. But no. They fling them up in the air, twirl them around their heads taking each other's eyes out, climb on each other, pull their pants down and wiggle their bums in each other's faces, shriek and yell and fight.

Within 20 seconds of them getting to their clothes at least one of them will have manage to lose an item of clothing (due to flinging) and then yell and moan that they can't find whatever said item is.

Am I being completely unreasonable to ask them to simply get the fuck on with it???????

<and goes to rock quietly in a corner>

Popbiscuit Mon 03-Oct-11 16:45:14

Nooooooooo YANBU but maybe a different choice of words? grin. What you have described is exactly what goes on at my house. My daughter is worse though...20 minutes of deliberating over what to wear then changing her mind, then changing it again. It's lunchtime here and I've only just stopped having heart palpitations from the stress of getting everyone to school this morning!

monstersX2 Mon 03-Oct-11 16:46:48

ynbu but i don't have any advice i'm afraid. Buti am slightly comforted that there are other boys like mine who mess about at dressing time! Although mine are 3 and 5 and have just realised it may go on for a while.... hmm

GandTiceandaslice Mon 03-Oct-11 16:48:16

My ds refuses to get dressed on the weekend if he isn't going anywhere.

I assume you're on about a school morning though.

Set an alarm, 1st one dressed gets a prize or something...

OR, send them up 1 at a time. That'll stop the fighting!

heather1 Mon 03-Oct-11 16:49:22

Every morning it is a massive surprise to DS2 that he has to get dressed. Plus he is horrified about it. Drives me mad too.
No solutions to offer, other than threatening to send them in PJs. But my youngest would probably like it!

Mousey84 Mon 03-Oct-11 16:50:47

I have to get DD (8) to get dressed in the bathroom - her bedroom has too many distractions.

Separate the boys and tell them its a race to see who can get dressed first. They get a star for being first, and whoever has the most stars on a friday wins amd gets to choose what dessert everyone has...?

PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn Mon 03-Oct-11 17:08:46

Once they've been delivered to school (on foot grin ) in their pyjamas in full view of the whole playground once, they seem to learn how to get dressed really well, all by themselves wink
(and yes I had the uniforms in a bag and explained all to the teacher and got them properly dressed in the cloackroom before lessons began before anyone goes hmm at me)

sparkle12mar08 Mon 03-Oct-11 17:08:47

Drag 'em out the door and down the street naked. They'll only ever do it the once, I promise!

sparkle12mar08 Mon 03-Oct-11 17:09:11

PomBear grin

joshandjamie Mon 03-Oct-11 17:13:44

Good tips - most of which I've tried including marching to school in pjs. Mornings are a nightmare but this particular rant was trying to get them dressed for swimming and soon it'll ne trying to get them dressed after swimming. Weep

LadyThumb Mon 03-Oct-11 18:47:04

Set an alarm clock - if they're not dressed by the time it goes off then they don't get to go swimming. Do the same for school - and they go just as they are. They only test this out once, so don't give in!

thisisyesterday Mon 03-Oct-11 19:24:54

my top tips are:

split them up. one gets dressed upstairs, one downstairs. minimise pissing about

tell them that if they get on with it they will have x amount of time to play before school.

and then keep reminding. but don't do it for them

i also tell ds1 that if he doesn't get dressed he can tell his teacher why he is late, and if he is in trouble for being late it's his own tough luck

bakeyouhappy Mon 03-Oct-11 19:34:11

Ladythumb exactly

No reason to be emotional. Here are your clothes. Here is a timer. Not on, not going. Then carry on with your day like you don't care.

joshandjamie Mon 03-Oct-11 19:37:42

except they would relish not going to swimming! I promise, promise, promise I have tried all of the things you're suggesting. Sometimes I have a breakthrough and it works once. Next time, it's as though we're back to square one.

spottypancake Mon 03-Oct-11 19:40:59

I get all the clothes ready the night before.

When kids are awake, I dress them, takes 30 seconds each. They are 5 and 3. I think there are better battles to be picked than getting dressed. Nobody reaches their teenage years unable to get dressed. Eldest has to get undressed for PE and swimming at school and does this quickly as teacher usually makes it a race.

zukiecat Mon 03-Oct-11 19:43:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EndoplasmicReticulum Mon 03-Oct-11 20:24:22

Mine are exactly the same OP - flinging, fighting, twirling etc. etc.

I have, however, solved the problem. I have got myself a job which means I need to leave the house at 7.30, before they need to be dressed.

If anyone has a solution I'm sure my husband would be very glad to hear it!

moogalicious Mon 03-Oct-11 20:30:31

Clothes out the night before.

Separate rooms.

Much shouting from me.

To be honest my 4 and 6 year old get dressed really nicely. It's the eldest, who is nearly 9 and has to out the earliest, who takes the longest. And there's no way I'm dressing a 9 year old!

moogalicious Mon 03-Oct-11 20:31:03

be out

LadyWord Mon 03-Oct-11 20:40:04

I have one 6yo who can't be arsed to get dressed, gets distracted, loses things, wanders off etc etc and one 18-month-old who point blank refuses to be helped and screams the house down if you try. Mornings are great in our house.

If necessary I will use outright bribery - only works on the 6yo but that's what you have. Get a chocolate button/other bribe - one each in your case - put them in full view and set an alarm/time on clock. They have to be dressed and ready in the set time then they get the treat. If not (this is the best bit) you eat it in front of them.

mwah-ha-ha-ha-haaaa

bintofbohemia Mon 03-Oct-11 20:46:25

Rofl @OP- I have 3 and 5 year old boys and they are exactly the same. Many mornings I have to stand over DS1 and count to ten. I have no idea what I'd ever do if I got to ten. Could live without having to be sergeant major bitch first thing in the morning so it's not reassuring to hear they don't outgrow it...

youarekidding Mon 03-Oct-11 20:54:13

YANBU. My 7yo DS is an only and he is just as bad.

I now tell him at 7.15am after breakfast to get dressed and brush teeth. At 7.45am I say we go in 15mins, then 10 mins, then 5 mins then 2 then 1 then WE GO.

He has been much better after last week when he got the laptop out as a response to being told to get dressed hmm. Told again to get dressed we leave at 8am. He was mortified when at 8am on the dot after all the warnings he had to walk to the car in his towel (had had a shower) and get dressed in breakfast club car park. The shock is just about wearing off so get the feeling it may happen again soon!

bakeyouhappy Mon 03-Oct-11 21:13:47

Its about ego and your kids are winning. You are acting like you can't handle it, so it continues. Put them in their room. They don't come out until clothes are on. Every time. No food, drinks nothing. Every time. If it takes 3 days, oh well. You win. Mom has to be stronger than 6+7 year olds.

boohoobabywho Mon 03-Oct-11 21:16:27

sorry but i have it cracked... only one dd... helps.

we have a routine, i wake at 7 shower and whatever i have to do, then 7.30 wake dd, both get into my big bed and watch the news till 7.45. then up washed and dressed by 8- does hers all byherself - teeth and hair too.

UNLESS

DH is in charge, then lots of mucking about, shouting, dh doing the dressing, dd moaning that this itches, that pinches etc etc etc.

I LOVE WEEKDAYS, they are so much easier!

joshandjamie Mon 03-Oct-11 22:14:29

Let me tell you what I've tried:

Rewards - very little seems to give quite enough focus

Threats and follow through -
- they lose pennies (lots of) off their pocket money (only a £1 a week and they rarely manage to keep more than 50p of that due to behaviour)
- no Telly/DS
- going up to school in PJs (have done this - well as far as onto the street outside the house while they desperately manage to fling their pjs off en route)
- no bedtime stories
- no going to whatever exciting thing may have been on the cards
- am sure there must be a million others

Incentives/fun
- we've had races
- timed dressings
- them racing me to get dressed
- get to play a game right afterwards
- etc

My presence
- I have stood right next to them like a cheerleader helping them on their way
- I have actually put the clothes on them - It makes sod all difference. If they're in a mood to arse around, I simply get the bum wiggled in my face.

Most things works for a day. But then it's groundhog day and we go back to square one. We've even had a run of about three days where they do it perfectly and I think I have finally cracked it. And then it implodes again.

I assure you I am a strict mum. But I hate, hate, hate having to start each day being a drill sergeant.

I'm just really pleased that it's not just my children. Incidentally, teeth cleaning is another sodding nightmare. My best threat that does work is that if they don't clean their teeth, I shall take their toothbrushes up to school and ask the head teacher to let them brush their teeth in front of the whole school at assembly. That does it.

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