really! To have the time and inclination to judge on it is one thing (really, aren't there more awful things to worry about?) but to comment on it while I can still hear them on a quiet street is well, just dim (not to mention rude) 
Yes, he is in a pushchair and yes he does look about 3 yrs old (he's not, he's 2.5 and tall) but we also have a two mile round trip to ds1's school over some incredibly busy roads. He can walk about half a mile at a fair pace but after that it becomes a snail's pace unless we are going to the park.
AIBU to have a little whinge about this? I certainly try not to go around judging automatically. And no, I wasn't brave enough to turn around and say all of the above. Not around here 
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AIBU?
to ask that if passers-by want to judge my toddler in a buggy they should at least get out of earshot?
125 replies
welliesandpyjamas · 03/10/2011 10:29
OP posts:
GalaxyWeaver ·
03/10/2011 10:32
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
welliesandpyjamas ·
03/10/2011 10:45
Lol aldiwhore at the glow in their icy hearts! and you're right, if I could teach ds2 to shout obsecenities it would paint a fab picture for them! Pop a greggs sausage roll in one hand and a fruit shoot in the other to make it even better? Mind you, even I would judge then 
(but keep my mouth shut!).
Glad I'm not considered to BU. It was just so rude.
OP posts:
itisnearlysummer ·
03/10/2011 10:50
YANBU to have a little whinge. People are annoying! There are a lot of people on here who will say they've never been openly judged and maybe they haven't, but it is annoying when it happens.
When DS was a baby I got loudly tutted at by an elderly man. To this day, I'm still not sure why - DS was appropriately dressed, sleeping soundly in his pram. I decided later it must have been because I looked quite young at the time and perhaps it was that.
I gave DS a rare unhealthy treat in a supermarket as I paid for it at the checkout and the woman on the checkout said "I'm sure you'd prefer something healthier that that, wouldn't you?"
"I think he needs changing/is hungry" at crying DS in supermarket. No he just really hated being inside shops and started screaming in his pram the minute we walked through the door and stopped the minute we walked out. A nice lady offered to hold my basket for me so I could get him out for a cuddle.
DD is small for her age so we get the other end of the spectrum comments to you.
It is really annoying and people should keep their mouths shut!
I judge people all the time - and don't believe anyone who says they don't. But would NEVER articulate my judgyness for them to hear because that would be so rude and at least as U as anything they were doing.
HecateGoddessOfTheNight ·
03/10/2011 10:59
five mile? two mile of course. 
But then, it's 2 miles twice a day, isn't it? so 4 miles a day walk for him all in. That's a lot for a toddler, I think. And they WILL go really slow so it will end up taking your whole day!
welliesandpyjamas ·
03/10/2011 11:01
Fantasticvoyage, yes, you are right, he is capable of the walk. I know because on weekends we let them loose in the woods and they keep running going all day but sadly I can't spare four hours a day to do the morning and afternoon school runs [shrug] and I think that is where I am coming from here... that there is always more behind what you see, that it is therefore not fair to judge automatically, and well, to do so in earshot is just bad manners.
OP posts:
welliesandpyjamas ·
03/10/2011 11:05
aquashiv now, why doesn't that surprise me! People always know better than you about your own life, don't they!
hecate yes, it's 4 miles a day (wish someone would tell my flabby bottom that, though! You'd think that 20 miles fast striding a week would have me looking fab, wouldn't you!) If time is limited and a pace needs to be maintained, it is just too much for a 2.5 year old.
OP posts:
TruthSweet ·
03/10/2011 11:06
Try having a 'ordinary' looking (for want of a better word - sorry) 3y/o who easily looks 5 (she's the same size or bigger than some of DD1's Y1 classmates) in an enormous special needs pushchair.
Not only do people comment in her earshot (two 'ladies' behind us on the bus spent the entire journey talking about 'in my day we folded our prams on the bus/our children rode their bikes into town as soon as they were 2/we were more considerate of others needs and blah blah blah' I have a huge child in a huge pushchair and a toddler in a sling don't you think I'd make her walk if she could??? I couldn't even fold it as DD2 was wearing DD1's slippers as her feet were so swollen so wasn't able to stand while I folded it) but people have actually told DD2 to get out of the pram so her little sister can get in it (DD3 was being carried at the time and is nearly 2). I had to hiss 'She has arthritis' at her so DD2 got patted on the head then 
People judge all the time I just wish they either directed it at me or did it internally. Not at my child who doesn't need to feel even more different than she already does through no fault of her own.
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TruthSweet ·
03/10/2011 11:19
Oatcakes - If only there was a like button I would have pressed it a 1000 times
wellies - Yes I agree completely but as she's in a SN pushchair because her joints hurt/she gets tired that makes her ears stop working much like adults in wheelchairs can't decide if they have milk or sugar in their tea with out being talked loudly at, or their companion being asked instead @@@@
JustinBoobie ·
03/10/2011 11:23
YANBU.
I agree with hectate too. Sometimes you shouldn't let people get away with being arses.
We still use the PC for DD 2.5 for when we need to be somewhere quickly, otherwise she'll walk. So up yours FantasticVoyage
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