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not to want shop assistants to upset DD1 with their thoughtless remarks

(31 Posts)
MrsSchadenfreude Sun 02-Oct-11 21:46:42

DD1 is 13. She is a shy and sensitive soul, unlike her mother. The other week, we were in John Lewis and she was being measured for a bra. The woman who was fitting her noticed that DD1 has stretch marks on her boobs (sudden boob inflation over a matter of weeks) and said to her "You know why you've got these marks all over your breasts? It's because you've been wearing the wrong sized bra. And they won't go, you know. You'll have them forever." DD1's bottom lip wobbled a bit, and I told the woman not to be so ridiculous - stretchmarks are caused by quick growth/weight gain, not a bra that might be a bit small.

Fast forward a few weeks, shoe shop in Oxford St, buying DD1 a pair of flowery DMs for her birthday. Man in shop refused to believe she was a size 8, brought her a size 6, despite both of us saying they wouldn't fit. Finally got the right size, was paying for them, and he said to her "You know, you really shouldn't have feet that size. It will be virtually impossible for you to get shoes to fit you. We have hardly any styles in a size 8. You'll need to wear trainers or men's shoes all the time."

I expect rude shop assistants and piss poor service in France, but this was in the UK. And if I hadn't been in the process of buying the shoes, I would have walked straight out. Instead, I asked the man if he was always this rude to customers, but he was old and deaf, and I don't think he heard.

emsyj Sun 02-Oct-11 21:49:00

YANBU.

shock at 'you shouldn't have feet that size' - is she supposed to hacksaw her toes off or what?

And anyway, most shops that I've come across do go up to size 8, it is quite a normal size for someone who is tall.

piprabbit Sun 02-Oct-11 21:50:08

Hurtful and ignorant shock.
I'm so glad you were able to speak up for your DD, she will have heard you even if the shoe shop assistant didn't.

BTW, I have size 8 feet and have no problem finding shoes I like in my size - spoilt for choice nowadays.

A1980 Sun 02-Oct-11 21:50:26

I would have told them to fuck off and keep there stuff. I wouldn't have bought from them.

LorelaisMommy Sun 02-Oct-11 21:51:39

What did the man expect her to do her??? Chop her toes off????????
YANBU, I would have complained about both members of staff. Ok, so your daughter needs to learn that life isn't perfect, and yes it sucks to have stretch marks and big feet (on boobs - check, size 7 - check), but there's no need to degrade her over it!!! How fucking rude!!!!

LoopyLoopsPussInBoots Sun 02-Oct-11 21:52:16

Please complain about both incidents. Poor DD. sad

Icelollycraving Sun 02-Oct-11 21:52:40

With regard to the bra fitter,it may be worth sending a letter explaining the situation,not a big ranty rambling one but one that explains the intimate nature of the job & the implications. What she said was wrong.
The shoe shop assistant sounds like an arse.

ButWhyIsTheGinGone Sun 02-Oct-11 21:54:05

Idiotic comments - and at an age where these things really stick with you! I'm a size 8 as well (sadly only in the foot dept!) and I manage to get decent enough shoes without hassle.
The breasts comment was so thoughtless though, feel quite cross!

workshy Sun 02-Oct-11 21:54:33

I hate people like that who feel they have the right to comment

I'm 6 ft tall with size 10 feet and it's always drawn comment

it's only been in the last couple of years that I have had any choice in shoes at all but if I was a man no one would bat an eyelid about the size of my feet

PaintedToenails Sun 02-Oct-11 21:54:51

I am with every other person on here. I'd have told them to stuff their merchandise up their bottoms.

I have been a size 8 since I was 14, never had any problems. I am also covered in many many stretch marks due to having grown boobs, hips and got 4 inches taller in one summer holiday when 13. At the time, didn't need it pointed out to me. At 34 (now) don't give a toss!

activate Sun 02-Oct-11 21:56:18

Bio Oil for stretch marks

go back to shop wearing flowery kickers and kick him in da goolies

celebmum Sun 02-Oct-11 21:56:53

YANBU! Silly man!

And for what it's worth my best friend, my sis in law and a work colleague of mine all have size 8feet and none of them ever have shit shies! Im a size 4 and I struggle more!!!

42day Sun 02-Oct-11 21:57:24

Proof again the world is full of idiots!

celebmum Sun 02-Oct-11 21:57:36

Shit SHOES!

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHorrid Sun 02-Oct-11 22:01:40

Poor dd. Size 8 really isn't that big for feet these days. My friends feet are almost all over a size 6 with loads 8 and above.

SmethwickBelle Sun 02-Oct-11 22:02:04

YANBU, if it is any comfort my mum has size eight feet and has always had more fashionable/nicer shoes than me.

Crosshair Sun 02-Oct-11 22:04:56

Im a size 8 and 5'5, never had a problem finding nice shoes or boots.

How rude, your poor dd.

krispykremeaddict Sun 02-Oct-11 22:09:01

What arses!

My sister is a size 8. She always has glam shoes. I'm a 7, we have a some of the same shoes - except she can normally get hers in the sales because there are always 8's left.

I have stretch marks on my bosoms despite always wearing the right bra size (my mum was a bra fitter so was very attentive in this department). I have lovely, pert norks according to boyfriends. The stretchmarks are never commented on.

AbyIsl Sun 02-Oct-11 22:09:15

YANBU!

Why the criticism of France? Funny but very random!

Dawndonna Sun 02-Oct-11 22:10:34

I'm a 9. I have no trouble with shoes at all.
Bloody nonsense.

ScaredyDog Sun 02-Oct-11 22:11:58

How bloody rude, I would complain to both shops. Short letters expressing your disappointment with how your daughter was treated.

You'll probably get little or nothing back from them as their customer service is clearly so shit, but it'll make you both feel better. Just say what happened and why you won't ever shop with them again.

I have size 8 feet and my sister (16) is the same. We never struggle to buy shoes - and we actually find lots of shoes in the sales as well, so it's win win for us!

Zipitydooda Sun 02-Oct-11 22:14:25

I would definitely complain. I grew boobs very quickly at 13 and got stretch marks. I would have been horrified if I had been told they'd never go away. My (nice) doctor prescribed E45 cream and the stretch marks faded gradually; I was definitely never self conscious about them. Please reassure her that they will go.

youarekidding Sun 02-Oct-11 22:16:14

activate Sun 02-Oct-11 21:56:18
Bio Oil for stretch marks

go back to shop wearing flowery kickers and kick him in da goolies

grin Couldn't have put it better myself. YANBU

ThePrincessRoyalFiggyrolls Sun 02-Oct-11 22:16:36

If you don't get some form of response from John Lewis I would be most suprised - however I think both comments are completely ridiculous and unpleasant for older people to make to a child. Its rude enough to say to an adult but to say something so compltetly thoughtless to a child pisses me off!

talkingnonsense Sun 02-Oct-11 22:17:14

Definitely write and complain, utterly appalling. Name and shame the shops?

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