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DD1 and Lady Chatterlery's Lover

(43 Posts)
ticktocktiptap Wed 28-Sep-11 13:05:22

DD1 is 14 and is a mature 14 yo.

All the DCs have always been able to read anything in the house.

She was going though my book shelf and picked up Lady Chatterlery's Lover the other day, after flicking through it and reading blurb etc. She asked could she read it. Of course she can.

DH found book in living room and asked me if I was re-reading it. I said it was DD1.

DH thinks it is not a appropriate book for her to read at all, and I should have said she couldn't read it.

I think it isn't like it is the Cement Garden or anything, and it isn't that bad at all in my eyes. And I would just tell her not to leave it in living room where younger DCs could pick it up and flick though and read (as they do with mine and DHs books if we leave them around)
He thinks we should say that actually she can't read it until she is older.

In my eyes the language isn't aything worse than she will hear at school, the sex isn't that explicit, And she knows herself - if she doesn't get on with it for whatever reason she will put it down and get back to it at a later date. Also we are close and she is the sort to tell me about what she is reading,what she thinks ec.

DH thinks it is highly unsuitable for her.

So AIBU to let her read it?

BelfastBloke Wed 28-Sep-11 13:08:03

I read it when I was about 14. I feel like I turned out all right, of course. But I also think it gave me an appreciation of other people's interior lives (not that that is what I was scanning the pages for, naturally).

Thingumy Wed 28-Sep-11 13:08:50

She's probably got worse language on her facebook account.

It's a fairly tame book when you compare it to today's standard of smut.


MissVerinder Wed 28-Sep-11 13:09:11


Has DH seen the "teen telly" available?

LCL is mild in compasrison.

ForYourDreamsAreChina Wed 28-Sep-11 13:10:50

Is DH's surname Whitehouse?

Tell him to get a grip. LC is beautifully written....and at least there's no glorification of rape like there is, in , Twilight for example.

cory Wed 28-Sep-11 13:12:20

The only problem is that it is a misogynistic rant, but imo that is not a reason for banning it, it's a reason for discussing it. Have never thought about keeping it in a special place where younger dcs can't pick it up.

Ephiny Wed 28-Sep-11 13:13:36

I read it when I was younger than that, though don't think I fully understood everything to be honest! I wouldn't have a problem with it, surely 14 is old enough to know about sex, and your DH is deluding himself if he thinks anything in there will be a surprise to her.

organiccarrotcake Wed 28-Sep-11 13:14:33

"The only problem is that it is a misogynistic rant"

And Enid Blyton is desperately sexist. If she can understand the historical reasons for this she's learning extra stuff, too smile

I would let her read it.

cory Wed 28-Sep-11 13:33:12

organiccarrot, it's on a totally different level from Blyton: D.H.Lawrence really did have unusual issues around women and this was noted at the time, there were plenty of contemporaries making fun of him and not all because they were prudes, either

to me, he is a bit like Strindberg: the fact that he happened to touch on some ideas that were modern and progressive at the time has made people forget that he was basically a self-pitying whimp who cared a lot less for ideas than for his own personal wallowing

but I won't stop dd from reading Strindberg either

ShowOfHands Wed 28-Sep-11 13:36:35

I'd let a 14yo read it. I read The Cement Garden then too actually.

Prometheus Wed 28-Sep-11 13:39:29

Bloody hell - I was having sex at 14...nevermind reading about it! Of course YANBU.

plaintabitha Wed 28-Sep-11 13:42:30

your DH is probably having a wobble about DD growing up.

But no, YANBU. Let her read it - Then tell her to read son and lovers because it is a far better Lawrence than LCL.

Guessing you would tell her to not leave in living room to pacify DH and/or/because of other DCs are a lot younger?

Oh and my kid sister read The cement garden at 15 - let her read that to. Because he is great smile

DaveyStott Wed 28-Sep-11 13:43:13

YANBU - I also read it around that age. And at school aged about 16 we did some DH Lawrence stuff, and our teacher actually recommended we read it ourselves (don't think she was allowed to use it as a classroom text).

However, I think that YABU for letting her read any of Lawrence's turgid drivel - I given up on several of his books wink

MiseryBusiness Wed 28-Sep-11 13:45:37

I read it when i was 13/14 and I turned out ok (I think)

Like others have said the content isnt any worse than she will be hearing/seeing in her normal life as a teenager.

Think your DH needs to chill a bit smile

ElderberrySyrup Wed 28-Sep-11 13:46:07

YANBU to let her read it but talk to her about the misogyny in Lawrence's world view.

You could get her Sexual Politics which does a fabulous demolition job on it, but the trouble is that quotes from Henry Miller which is far worse, so you would have to just give her certain chapters and it would all get a bit complicated.

MooncupGoddess Wed 28-Sep-11 13:46:07

Haha! Finding Lady Chatterly and reading the rude bits is a classic rite of passage. I feel quite nostalgic now. She's probably read much worse, passed around illicitly between friends, if my schooldays are anything to go by.

Yes, it is misogynistic but I doubt she'll spot that at her age. Talk the misogynistic bits through with her if you're worried, but she'll probably just have read the passage where he puts bluebells round his willy.

michelleseashell Wed 28-Sep-11 13:47:21

YANBU times 1000. It may have been shocking when it was written but it's a lovely, emotional piece which at 14 I would have found quite boring.

It's miles apart from Junk by Melvin Burgess and I would let a 14 year old read that.

And the Twilight series, well, there's no end of transparent references to premarital sex in that with the only nod to it's immorality being that such a viewpoint is old fashioned.

Let her read it! It's a great piece of literature which should increase her vocabulary at the least. And good on her if she manages to finish it because I found it a bit of a trial in my twenties!

plaintabitha Wed 28-Sep-11 13:52:20

'Oh and my kid sister read The cement garden at 15 - let her read that to. Because he is great' Should probably point out that was way back in late 70's when it first came out. (wow I feel old)

Again - let her read it

brighthair Wed 28-Sep-11 14:00:42

YANBU - I had an adult library card from 11 and read anything and everything, mum never censored my reading. Age 27 now and I still read as much as I did then, sometimes 20 books a week. Anything that encourages children and teenagers to read is good in my eyes

SnakeOnCrack Wed 28-Sep-11 14:37:41

Ha, I read it at 14. I also loved Jilly Cooper from the age of 13/14 and that's just as bad.. I wouldn't worry, it's an appropriate age to start reading that sort of carry on I think!

mumwithdice Wed 28-Sep-11 14:43:14

YANBU. Really, compared with some of the things out there, LCL is positively tame.

flickmeoff Wed 28-Sep-11 15:41:35

Haha - YANBU.
Heck I'd let a 14yr old read trainspotting and Porno.

Tell your DH to be happy that she is not just reading some of the shit books out there for people her age

Hullygully Wed 28-Sep-11 15:45:04

Just so long as you tell her that women do not, on the whole, wait for the man to come and then make little wriggling motions afterwards to "bring themselves off."

Still haven't got over that.

And yes, huge women ishoos.

Whatmeworry Wed 28-Sep-11 15:49:48

Just so long as you tell her that women do not, on the whole, wait for the man to come and then make little wriggling motions afterwards to "bring themselves off

Ah, the things Feminism has brought us grin

LCL is just todays teenspeak but written decently.

PastGrace Wed 28-Sep-11 15:53:26

I read it at about 12 or 13. I was very disappointed with how much of a let down it was! Everyone at school decided to read it - there were a lot of put out girls the next week!

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