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Anyone living where they grew up?

(75 Posts)
toptramp Sat 24-Sep-11 22:24:38

And wondering if the grass is greener? I grew up in a small town which is lovely but I moved away to cities to do uni and also travelled abroad. I wanted to stay in my uni city as I loved the social life but when I got pregnant I moved back home to be near my parents.

It IS lovely here and perfect for bringoing up kids plus I am near dad (mum has sadly since left us) but AIBU for feeling a little bit bored and mabe a bit of a failure that I couldn't make a life for myself elsewhere? I know I am being unreasonable but small towns can be such a bubble. I won't move probably but I wonder if I will end up here as an old lady regretting the fact that I didn't spread my wings.

mumblechum1 Sat 24-Sep-11 22:26:10

God no. Small town in Lake District, didn't see me for dust and I only rarely go back to see parents.

I don't think I know anyone who lives now where they were brought up, it must be extremely unusual.

fivegomadindorset Sat 24-Sep-11 22:26:59

Yes, but then it really is lovely.

Signet2012 Sat 24-Sep-11 22:27:31

I live in the same town. The estate next to where I was bought up as a child, in the estate I wasnt allowed on when I was a child !!

Would love to move ASAP but dont think it will happen as most places round here are a bit shite, including where I am but better the devil you know....

fivegomadindorset Sat 24-Sep-11 22:28:00

Actually a fair amount of people, probably the majority, have grown up here.

fivegomadindorset Sat 24-Sep-11 22:28:12

Of who I know

BelleDameSansMerci Sat 24-Sep-11 22:28:32

Not bloody likely grin

Although, being more serious, I've lived all over the UK; travelled the world; lived in Dublin for a bit and now live about 150 miles from "home" but since having DD (now 4) I've seriously considered moving back. There's a lot to be said for "home" when you have a child, I think...

MsWetherwax Sat 24-Sep-11 22:29:18

I would love to be able to move back to my home town, but met and fell in love with dp who is from a different county. I've travelled, and lived all over England, and I think personally think there is no place like home.

workshy Sat 24-Sep-11 22:29:31

I moved away but I would say a good 50% of the people I went to high school with still live within 5 miles of the school

rogersmellyonthetelly Sat 24-Sep-11 22:30:03

Me. I love my home town, it's where I belong, I don't feel right anywhere else. All my family are within 10 miles, just how I like it.

SingingSands Sat 24-Sep-11 22:30:29

No, thank God. I couldn't afford a shed there, never mind a house!

AgentZigzag Sat 24-Sep-11 22:30:36

I moved away from where I grew up for about 15 years, and we moved back to an area nearby about 10 years ago.

I like the familiarity of it, when people ask me where I'm from they know where I mean (and usually know the same people).

You can get used to other places of course, but it's where your home is in your head that matters.

Booandpops Sat 24-Sep-11 22:31:01

Yes. I live six miles from my parents and dh parents are 16 miles away
We toted with the idea of moving south west but when dd arrived I was managing my own business and needed support of gps I couldn't do it with out them. Also we felt cruel if we took the grandkids away A's they are very involved
We are lucky though to live in a lovely communal village but close to several big towns for shops and night out etc
I'm very happy we stayed put.

nickschick Sat 24-Sep-11 22:31:25

yes Ive moved away but always end up back here the positives are that I often see people I know that I grew up with the downside is ......its a shithole.

TrillianAstra Sat 24-Sep-11 22:31:34

AIBU for feeling a little bit bored and mabe a bit of a failure that I couldn't make a life for myself elsewhere?

There's nothing to say that you will be an old lady there, if you don't like it you can still move.

For me being close to my parents would not outweigh the (as I see it) disadvantages of living where I grew up, but for you maybe this is the best choice.

TheArmadillo Sat 24-Sep-11 22:31:40

yep me and dh do plus most of our friends went to school with us and still live in the same city. I reckon half my colleagues grew up in the local area.

Talking about town, not street.

It is a big city though and we have lived in different areas of it. I have no desire to move. We are happy, surrounded by friends and family.

Dh's family have been in the area a long time (surname is reasonably local one). I wasn't born here but moved here when young. Went to local university.

FabbyChic Sat 24-Sep-11 22:31:44

Im glad Im not living where I grew up, the crime rate their has soared!

southeastastra Sat 24-Sep-11 22:33:16

i do, i moved away to the big city for 15 years then moved back

it was and is nice to be closer to my family again as that is all that matters

messybessie Sat 24-Sep-11 22:36:04

I left at 18 and moved to London. Moved back to my hometown at 35.

My kids and DH love it, and I do really, but deep down do feel a failure. I didn't come back to an elephant parade or bunting, I didn't return with my fortune and my house is considerably smaller than my parent.

But lots of people here have done the same thing.

I take heart from the notion that it wasn't a bad place to raise children - but was shit enough to really want to leave as a teenager. grin

If it wasn't my home town, I'd be really happy with my life. But maybe it's just my pride talking and I need to get over it.

I did have counselling (about something else) and we talked about it. My counsellor said it was important to remember that you don't come back to where you left off. You don't return to the same life that you left, because you have all the experience you had when living somewhere else - and that has made you a different person than the one you would have been if you had never left.

I think blush

40notTrendy Sat 24-Sep-11 22:36:57

I do. But it's a big city. So not the same really. Would go back to my university city if money or circumstances allowed.

carpwidow Sat 24-Sep-11 22:37:54

I'm living in the house where my grandparents lived and my dad was born in my bedroom. I think it's nice that it's a family home that has been passed on. As for feeling a bit of a failure that I couldn't make a life for myself elsewhere? Hell no. I really enjoy my life - have some fantastic friends, a good career, get to see a lot of the world. Life is not about where you are geographically, but where you are in your head.

pinkmagic1 Sat 24-Sep-11 22:40:09

Yes, infact I can see the garden of the house I grew up in from my DS's bedroom! My children also attend the same primary school as I did. I have lived in other areas of the city but me and DH decided to move to the area we live in now when we decided to start a family as it is nice without being ridiculously overpriced and there are a few decent schools in the vicinity. I do think I am in the minority though and sometimes part of me would like to move away somewhere totally new.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Sat 24-Sep-11 22:41:25

No, but i wish I were. I lived in Folkestone and I daren't go back now as it will have changed beyond everything I can remember as familiar and that would be too painful. If I'd never left, I would have evolved with my surroundings. sad

hiccymapops Sat 24-Sep-11 22:43:11

I do. I'm surprised at myself too. I moved here (very small village in Yorkshire) from London when I was 14. Always hated it, and thought it was strange that everyone here seemed to have grown up here and never moved on. Everyone seemed to know each others business.

After college I moved away, and worked all over. I moved back 8 years ago with dh, we bought the house from my dad, with the intentions of selling and moving on. But now we have dc's, we've decided to stay. I love the fact it's nice and quiet here, and people are friendly, and will actually look out for our children. They'll get away with nothing around here grin. Can't believe how I've changed grin.

PumpkinBones Sat 24-Sep-11 22:45:12

I've never lived anywhere else, but I live in a fairly big city so probably not quite the same. Not many people that I grew up with have moved away. I don't plan to leave, unless it is to Seattle, where I have longed to live for years grin

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