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AIBU to put myself and unborn child through this stress??

(11 Posts)
allibaba Thu 22-Sep-11 10:59:07

I would caveat this with "its all my own fault, I insisted that I would be fine".

But not feeling it today, in fact feeling pretty low. I'm sitting my professional exams in 2 weeks and am at home revising (not meant to be on MN). I have DS1 17mo, am 26+5 with DS2, today is my 4th wedding anniversary which my DH and I will be spending apart as he's off to a stag do. I can't get comfy at night to sleep properly and when I do drift off I'm getting anxeity dreams about missing my bloody exam!!

I'm iron deficient, feeling sick after taking the damn tablets now and am soo hormonal I can cry at the drop of a hat or more embarrasingly everytime I go round to a friends house to get away from the stress!

I've only 2 weeks to go and then I can forget the last 6 months I have spent revising and actual enjoy my pg and time with my family but I feel so guilty for putting my DH (who has been VV supportive) and DS1 through this not to mention how this may affect DS2 with his mum just being a stress head at the mo.

AIBU to want the best for my career and ultimately my family by doing this or have I (again) bitten off more than I can chew, cut off my nose to spite my face and whole host of other cliches!!!??

Sorry for rant but having a crap day so far...sad

ThePosieParker Thu 22-Sep-11 11:03:00

Get iron rich food and a drink from the health food shop....ditch the tablets.
Timetable in rest time and nice time, even within the next two weeks. Unwind with sad movie and get it all out!!

It will be worth it.

AKMD Thu 22-Sep-11 11:06:46

If you were 2 weeks into the course I would say forget it and try again after you've had the baby, but you've already done 6 months' worth of work and only have 2 weeks to go, so keep going, get it over with and then relax. As ThePosieParker said, timetable in some R&R. You will be kicking yourself later if you don't do this exam.

allibaba Thu 22-Sep-11 11:17:22

Thank you. I will take a trip out this afternoon to the health food shop I think, the iron tablets are horrible.

I think I'm just looking for reassurance that I am doing the right thing and not being a totally selfish blob. 2 weeks to go and I get my life back, roll on 6th October...

KindKim Thu 22-Sep-11 11:19:49

No yadnbu!
You could be feeling like this just because you are pregnant, without the added pressure of studying and forthcoming exams.

As you say, you only have two more weeks of this stress, then it will be over. bar the nailbiting whilst waiting for the results

You are putting you, your dh and ds's through this for very good and not totally selfless reasons. You say your dh has been very supportive so far, to give up this close to the finishing line would be more destructive (to your self esteem, potential future, and your relationship) than carrying on.

Grit your teeth, give it your all and anticipate the relief you will feel the night your exams are finished as you kick back and know you have done all you can.

To put a positive spin on your post...you are making a big effort to improve your own and your family's life by doing this studying. You have a lovely supportive dh that you have been married to for 4 years. (congrats btwsmile)

Ds1 is too young to remember that period of his life where mummy just kept putting cbeebies on for him and had her head stuck in the pc. Ds 2 doesn't really care that you have your head stuck in a pc as long as you eat well, and get rest where you can.

Once your exams are over you will have approx 11 weeks to enjoy the anticipation of ds2's arrival. And once you feel ready to rejoin the workplace you will have a new/better career to look forward to and explore.

It is normal to have these type of dreams in high periods of stress. It just shows how important it is to you, so don't let all the hard work you have done so far go to waste. In 2 weeks time you will be so glad you did it!

Sorry you're not sleeping well, but you must take rest where you can, even if you don't sleep, rest will be of benefit.

FWIW, i have had 2 pregnancies which were during periods of high stress in my life. As i took all 3 of my children to school this morning you wouldn't have been able to tell which one was born of the "ideal" life situation during pregnany!

You are a mummy, therefore you have amazing coping abilities that you probably aren't even aware of yet!

Go on girl, you can do it, only 2 more weeks. That's nothing for all the benefit it will give you in the remaining years of your life.

I'm going to start a cheerleading team....Go alli, go alli, go alli... smile

Ps, what profession are you entering?

wicketkeeper Thu 22-Sep-11 11:59:58

Exams in October? Must be the OU? I finished my degree the year I gave birth to DC2 - was 6 months pg at the start of the course, gave birth in the April, and sprained my ankle on the morning of the exam (had to do the resit - on my birthday!!). You will survive, and it will be well worth it.

<Shakes pom poms with KindKim>

allibaba Thu 22-Sep-11 12:05:41

I will hopefully be a surveyor. Well, I am a surveyor but I will be officially Chartered if I pass the exams. So 5 years at uni, 3 years working to gain experience, it'll all be over smile

Kind Kim I'm glad you've said about the stress with your LOs as I have been worrying whether I shall give birth to an over-anxious child who didn't enjoy the exam experience either. I don't remember a thing from when I was 3yo never mind 2 so you're right DS1 won't remember! I think I always will though when I see his little face wanting to play with me and he doesn't understand why mummy has to go and work.

MissPenteuth Thu 22-Sep-11 12:09:33

Regarding the iron deficiency, have you tried Spatone? It's a liquid supplement and a lot of people seem to get on better with it than the tablets. You can add it to orange juice (hides the taste and the vit C helps the iron absorb). Most large pharmacies should have it on the shelf.

CocktailQueen Thu 22-Sep-11 12:10:44

Agree with the others. Only 2 weeks to go!!! Get some R&R, chill out, take a deep breath, ditch the iron tabs if they make you feel so rough and instead eat iron-rich food to boost your iron levels - red meat, green leafy veg, fortified bread/cereals/dried fruit.
Hang on in there!

dribbleface Thu 22-Sep-11 12:26:22

been there done that, twice! finished my studies at 32 weeks this time. your so close just keep going, you will feel so proud when your done! x

Mandy2003 Thu 22-Sep-11 12:51:45

Do you have a full length body pillow like this to help you get comfortable in bed?

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