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To think that in a fight to the death between ...

(36 Posts)
AgentZigzag Fri 16-Sep-11 21:02:05

...zombies, werewolves and vampires, Gary Oldman vampires would have the edge?

Werewolves would be ball scratching nobbers (knobbers or nobbers?) for 30 odd days of the month, so you'd have to catch them at a full moon to be very effective.

It's a bonus for zombies to be able to carry on regardless of any limbs they've lost, plus they're persistent buggers, but their biggest downfall is their thick as fuckness.

Vampires on the other hand will be able to draw on their vast sexual experiences have extensive fighting skills to ward off the zombies, be able to divert the ball scratching dogs with beer, and cut to the bone with their razor sharp wit and dress sense.

Werewolves would have fleas anyway grin

DoMeDon Fri 16-Sep-11 21:03:37


TheVermiciousKnid Fri 16-Sep-11 21:05:29

None of them would stand a chance against vermicious knids.


TheVermiciousKnid Fri 16-Sep-11 21:06:31

Or even against the slightly tamer vermicious knits.


AgentZigzag Fri 16-Sep-11 21:07:01

smile I'm going to take your answer as a representative sample of the MN population DMD. While I can.

Talker2010 Fri 16-Sep-11 21:08:12

I always find Zombies slow ... they have that awkward walking style

Since vampires are faster than fast ... I agree

Better in bed too I reckon

pinkytheshrinky Fri 16-Sep-11 21:09:02

Clearly you have given some thought to shagging Gary Oldman vampire/zombie/werewolf confrontations.

Yanbu Gary Oldman is extremely shaggable vampires would win

AgentZigzag Fri 16-Sep-11 21:10:30

I nearly accidently wrote the OP from the better in bed point of view, but I thought it would be far too shallow for MN grin

Birdsgottafly Fri 16-Sep-11 21:10:41

Vampires ruined my life, all my ambitions centered around them.

When i grew up all i wanted to be was a vampire, alas it was not to be.

YANBU, Vampires rule.

TeamEdward Fri 16-Sep-11 21:10:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AgentZigzag Fri 16-Sep-11 21:13:49

On the bed side of things, as you brought it up Talker, werewolves, despite the possibility of leaving clumps of hair everywhere, at least don't have the rotting flesh factor you'd have to politely ignore with zombies.

I would find rotting flesh a bit of a turn off tbh.

No offence to any zombies out there.

DoMeDon Fri 16-Sep-11 21:17:58

YABU not to have made it into a sex question on a friday wink

Werewolf on the turn would be best - full on wolf is beastiality non?

GeraldineAubergine Fri 16-Sep-11 21:18:34

Werewolves would be a bit warmer on a chilly autumn evening and more likely to share dinner with you than a vampire though.

LaWeasel Fri 16-Sep-11 21:37:03

Wolf shagging would have to be in human form otherwise that's just weeeeird. But I reckon they would be better in bed than vampires because they wouldn't be cold, and werewolves are stereotypically more impulsive.

I suppose vampires would have decades of experience...

Zombies is just a no.

ScarletLady01 Fri 16-Sep-11 21:44:55

As long as it wasn't stupid sparkly vampires I'd say you're right.

Fuck Team Edward...I'm Team Blade!

NeonFlapjacks Fri 16-Sep-11 22:03:33

I'm not sure how TeamEdward would feel about that Scarlett ... grin

afteralongsquawk Fri 16-Sep-11 22:04:04

One-on-one, full moon-tide, doggies win - no question.

For the rest of my cycle. doggies are out of it. One-on-one, batty boys would get it, but feral estate kids zoms don't come one-on-one: they always fill the whole effing horizon, don't they?

So my money is on the zoms.

Of course, PMT girls would clean up against any of these puny males.

HairyGrotter Fri 16-Sep-11 22:09:03

Team Salvatore Brothers, at the same time. Along with that Tyler wolf boy.

Fuck the sparkly ones (unless it's James or Emmett, or Jasper at a push, oh and Carlisle)

TeamEdward Fri 16-Sep-11 22:17:27

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

unintendedadult Fri 16-Sep-11 22:36:27

Zombies would far surpass the dogs and neck knibblers!!

After all have you seen 'em, they just keep cuming coming and coming!! grin

SuePurblybilt Fri 16-Sep-11 22:39:24

Vampires are annoying. Zombies drop limbs and look foolish.

Werewolefs are the future. There's no rucksack can cope with them <but a nice choccy drop may work temporarily>

buzzskillington Fri 16-Sep-11 22:44:14

Zombies go 24-7 and anyone who gets bitten becomes one,
vamps can only do nights and have to turn people deliberately
werewolves only do a couple of nights a month and someone has to survive an attack (rare) to become one.

Therefore, by sheer weight of numbers, zombies FTW.

buzzskillington Fri 16-Sep-11 22:51:04

And I prefer nobbers to knobbers. I'm not sure why.

AgentZigzag Fri 16-Sep-11 22:52:43

Can't werewolefs claim extra points for their vipers bite when they rip your throat out?

Could be a myth?

I just can't understand any zombie votes, you're probably more likely to encounter a zombie than the other two (DH encounters one every morning as we pass like ships in the morning grin) but they're driven by their desire for human flesh, surely they would spurn zombies and vampires as being inhuman?

SuePurblybilt Fri 16-Sep-11 22:55:52

That's a good point. Werewolefs would win because they are just fighty, they will attack anything. Zombies and Vamps want to eat/drink/kill humans so they'll be bimbling about in the ring, looking for people smells. The Werewolef would have them eaten before they knew it.

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