We have two daughters, 4 and 7, now both at school.
I've growing concerns re my wife becoming increasingly fanatical about pretty much everything. There is nothing in our house/lifestyle that isn't a threat to our children. Mobile phones, wireless hubs, chopping boards, lip salve, dirty electricity (that's a long one to discuss), baby monitors, "the garden", leave in conditioner, dishwasher tablets, microwave ovens, barbeques....I could go on.
We've had some counselling over the issues that have driven us apart. Basically my wife has taken from it that I can't react to any of her behaviours just to keep her happy, however the behaviour is getting more extreme and I can't get her to see that it's out of hand and becoming detrimental to our children.
All our friends see how unrelaxed she is and find her hard work, her sister had a massive fall out on holiday as she couldn't cope. Her mum sits on the fence as she doesn't want to offend her. Her dad see's it all, but she doesn't listen to him.
My wife would love a third child, and treats our youngest as a child to hang to the baby element. In the climate that has been around for 7 years, I've never wanted a third child. I've put both of a children to bed around 5 times in 7 years as my wife always wants to do it and doesn't have any outside hobbies. She continues to lift our youngest at 1am to pee, but any discussions to try not lifting and moving on isn't heard.
I find it unfair on our youngest who is used to still be spoon/fork fed, warm milk morning and night. Her appetite is judged by mum not our daughter. Bribes and blackmail for ice-creams are regularly handed out, even though our daughter has said she's not hungry at least three times.
They are not obese children at all, but one of my concern is the lack of encouraging independence and the ongoing fears of the world v's her young children. There seems no perspective, and I've given up trying to discuss it as she can justify everything and turns it into an argument which ends with, if that's what keeps me happy leave me to it.
It is easier for me not be in the kitchen when she is cooking, preparing and feeding our children. Any raw meat is treated as nuclear waste. I love to cook for the children, but I've given up when my wife is around. I get two days a week of doing supper, bath and books which keeps me sane, but it's not enough. I'm told what to cook, when and for how long......I'm then the child.
If anyone can shed any light on what is normal I'd be grateful. She's changed so much in the last 10 years, I'm on my knees with it.
Regards Simmon
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34 replies
Simmon · 13/09/2011 10:03
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