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How do you break your dc bad habits?

(14 Posts)
toptramp Sun 11-Sep-11 22:47:45

Ok so it's not really aibu but I feel that dd;
Eats too many sweets, watches too much tele and refuses to sit at the dining table as we lived in a house without a table for the first two years of her life. When I get tired she wears me down with winging so I often cave in to demands of sweets and tele even though she does eat a balanced diet and we do a lot of other activities apart from cbeebies. AIBU or am I being a bit ott?

CailinDana Sun 11-Sep-11 22:49:02

What age is she?

FabbyChic Sun 11-Sep-11 22:49:55

Don't give her too many sweets, or don't have any in the house that's how you break that habit.

Turn the TV off if you feel she watches too much tell her it is broken and only works at certain times of the day!

Re the table thing, Im not big on eating at the table but you could just put her dinner there and tell her that is where she has to eat it.

smallmotherbigheart Sun 11-Sep-11 22:57:42

i live in a house with other people who seem to think its ok to allow my son to watch tv all day long despite me telling them its not healthy.... so i simply confiscated the fuse til they said they understood. simplez.

the table thing isnt so much of a big deal, but yeah deffo keep an eye on the sweets!! xx

Takitezee Mon 12-Sep-11 00:22:28

If she watches CBeebies then she still must be quite young. You need to stand firm and don't let her wear you down. If she knows that whinging will allow her to get her own way and it's just a matter of time then she will keep doing it.

When you tell her to do or not to do something then you must mean it and stick to it, life's not going to get any easier if you don't.

SurprisEs Mon 12-Sep-11 00:36:58

I believe that when getting rid of bad habits a gentle approach should be taken as we (parents) aloud for the habit to form in the first place.

I had the same problem, but with Disney Chanel. I sorted it by telling her Mickey was having a nap or something silly. Then I made sure I took a few minutes to engage her in something else until she was ready to distract herself. Be firm but kind.

As for the table, I know I'll have the same problem, I have no table at the moment. Dreading the day.

Will she take raisins instead of sweets? Sometimes it works.

Or you can just say my way or no way. But I know I wouldn't feel right as I formed the habit. Saying that, all children are different and my daughter reacts better to bribery then a straight no. Although no is used when necessary, I just don't think it's the best approach to breaking bad habits.

HipHopOpotomus Mon 12-Sep-11 00:40:59

Have an activity planned for when you turn the telly off.

Colouring, tea party, dancing, painting, letting them loose with some pva glue and things to cut and stick etc - dd will whinge a little but then get stuck in and enjoy the alternative. Foster their imaginative play skills and you'll find even young kids can occupy themselves quite well for some time.

SurprisEs Mon 12-Sep-11 00:47:07

I have to say that DD is 2 and due to Mickey Mouse she already knows how to distinguish a triangle, a circle, a square, a diamond shape and a star shape, cartoons are not all bad if in moderation.

fargate Mon 12-Sep-11 02:01:07

Not OTT, in my book.

Not really AIBU - as you acknowledge. Maybe, better in wet parenting as that seems the main issue ?

Iamseeingstars Mon 12-Sep-11 02:17:38

You are in control of her life and it is up to you to sort out routines.

Dont buy sweets or biscuits. Shouldnt even be an option.

TV ok in small doses but needs to be moderated. When the TV is off you will need to spend time with her and show her different activities taht she can do on her own so that he isnt 100% relying on your attention.

If she doesnt sit at the table, she doesnt get fed.

Harsh, cruel, but you are only going to make things worse if you dont sort out these basic issues now

Good luck

izzywhizzyletsgetbusy Mon 12-Sep-11 03:12:39

When I get tired she wears me down with winging

If you don't overcome your tiredness and stand firm when necessary, you'll be making a rod for your own back.

As advised, don't keep sweets/biscuits in the house but encourage her to help you make cookies for special occasions.

Make sitting at the table fun - play games, read books together, cut up an orange or apple to eat or share a plate of sandwiches. When you serve meals, sit her at the table. Don't fret if she gets off her chair and don't take notice of any whinging.

Leave her plate/dish on the table and if she hasn't joined you by the time you've finished your meal, put her food in the fridge when you clear away and re-heat it and place it on the table later if she complains that she's hungry.

fargate Mon 12-Sep-11 04:18:45

Some great advice from izzywhizzy and other posters.

Another way of looking at it, is to put yourself in your DDs position.

She's small and her world is big and confusing - and so she looks to you to make herself feel safe, to know what she should want, how she should feel and behave.......

She needs you to be calm and certain and to decide how she spends her time, what she eats, etc. She needs you to be in charge and you need to be in charge for her sake.

All children whinge in my experience. As do quite a lot of adults.

oldraver Mon 12-Sep-11 10:10:18

When I get tired she wears me down with winging so I often cave in to demands

Do. Not. Cave. When you say no you have to mean it, as she will think if she winges enough she will get her own way. If you dont in x amount of year time you will be still wondering why she wont listen to you.

Dont routinely have sweets in the house there is just no need. Make them a treat. When DS1 was little it crept up on me that he was asking for sweets everytime we went to the shop, so I made Saturday 'sweetie day' and he loved going and choosing some pick and mix and looked forward to it. Do the same with the TV, have set times when she watches, say if she has a favourite programme but dont have it as constant background

Fargate is right in that children will winge, its what they do but take away the winging for the not needed stuff and it will be easier to deal with

Claw3 Mon 12-Sep-11 10:25:19

Ds would eat sweets for breakfast, lunch and dinner and play ps3 24/7 if i let him. All kids would winge if it meant they get their own way. The more you give in, the more they would winge until they get their own way because it has worked for them in the past. All kids would refuse to do anything they didnt want to do, if when they refused, they didnt have to do it.

Have clear rules and boundaries.

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