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AIBU?

to be pissed off at a "friend" moaning about someone breastfeeding a newborn

40 replies

BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability · 10/09/2011 08:49

Okay to start with, I know I probably am, I'm pregnant and hormonal and everything is rubbing me up the wrong way But I have to unload this somewhere, and DH is in work...

I've just checked my facebook (yep its a facebook one ) this morning and a friend from school is moaning that shes had no sleep in the hospital (shes just had DS) because the woman next to her is breastfeeding and the baby was up all night.
Umm... Is that not what newborns do regardless of how they are fed! But nooo, she has to whinge about this baby "kicking off constantly" when he/she needs feeding! [grr]
Am very tempted to write something along the lines of "you know, it is rather difficult to get used to BF a newborn" but I'm just going to leave it I think.

Ok, I've typed it and I'm now quite sure I am BU and its none of my business. But I feel a little better :)

OP posts:

Report

NinkyNonker · 10/09/2011 08:52

That's nowt to do with BF and everything to do with being a newborn. She needs to get such silly, antiquated ideas put of her head. But she is probably tired and hormonal too.

claricestar · 10/09/2011 08:57

YANBU to be bothered by what she put on facebook....but I wouldn't bother commenting because she will be tired and hormonal as well. Your mate is BU for putting such a post on facebook...noone enjoys sleepless nights on a post natal ward...no point in blaming the other mums, they are all in the same boat.

HoneyPablo · 10/09/2011 09:00

That's the problem with facebook. All those thoughts that we have going round in our heads that should stay in our heads, all end up on facebook.
Why does a new mother need to be updating her facebook account from hospital? Hasn't she got anything better to do? I don't know, maybe like looking after a newborn baby?

cleanteeth · 10/09/2011 09:03

Awww she's probably tired from giving birth!

When i had DS he was as quiet as a mouse all night but all the other babies in the ward where screaming all night. I knew it was to be expected but it still irriationally pissed me off.

TryLikingClarity · 10/09/2011 09:04

She is being VU.

Iggi999 · 10/09/2011 09:06

She has a lot to learn! She didn't just moan to her dh or a friend though did she, she put it on fb so another small "bf is bonkers" message got put out there.. I'd be annoyed too, but nothing really you can do.

sleepevader · 10/09/2011 09:08

I would put a welcome to motherhood- comment.

SecretSquirrell · 10/09/2011 09:10

One word.

Homebirth.

plupervert · 10/09/2011 09:10

You will probably make yourself feel better by posting some gentle comment about hoping she gets some sleep, and thank goodness the baby was breastfed, or else there would have been a longer wait for the formula, and more fussing!

PrimaBallerina · 10/09/2011 09:12

Press delete! She's just given birth and is entitled to be irrational.

BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability · 10/09/2011 09:12

Phew. though I did hope that you'd all say I was being U (and maybe some sort of BF nazi ) so I could tell myself to stop being silly!

I feel I should inform her (though I obviously wont!) that my BF DS slept better than any of the others in hospital as I had him in the bed with me rather than in the fishtank, and it was the evil FFers that kept me awake...

OP posts:

HeyYouJimmy · 10/09/2011 09:22

She is being unreasonable. She can't expect all babies to be quiet when she wants some sleep.

coastgirl · 10/09/2011 09:51

My BF baby was the only quiet one in a ward full of bottlefed babies (given what I heard during the day I strongly suspect the other women couldn't be arsed to do the bottles during the night) - how annoyed was I to be kept awake by five other babies while mine slept?

VFVF · 10/09/2011 10:56

Oh dear, I was that breastfeeding mother once! Felt so guilty that my newborn was crying all night whilst I tried to get her to latch on with three other mothers in the bay. This time round it'll be tough toenails, as I discovered later, if you're really tired you'll sleep through another child's cries.

usualsuspect · 10/09/2011 11:00

Is this another bf v ff thread ?

VFVF · 10/09/2011 11:04

I hope not usualsuspect if it helps I switched to formula at six weeks and she still couldn't sleep more than an hour without having a good old whinge

ChippingIn · 10/09/2011 11:09

Of course she's being unreasonable and you are not.

I think Plupervert offered the best advice :)

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 10/09/2011 11:16

Yabu, nuffin to do with breastfeeding.

The poor moo's knackered and is griping about being kept awake all night, that is all.

GrownUpNow · 10/09/2011 11:17

I had a woman in the bed next to me like this, her baby was in SCBU and I'd just had mine and she was a grizzly baby and cried all night. She shouted across the curtain "shut that fucking baby up" on my first night and I got myself all worked up. Fortunately the midwives were really good to me and took my DD to the night nursery and just brought her back for breastfeeds for a couple of nights.

Next time I'm going to book a private room so I can concentrate on me and baby and not worry about disturbing everyone else, as I was worried about it anyway without people kicking off.

southmum · 10/09/2011 11:18

yabu

no-one likes being kept awake by a hungry grizzling baby of any kind. Anyone who has just given birth is allowed to be pissed off until the realisation sets in that it happens to all of us.

If she was moaning about a ff baby would you still be pissed off?

Harecare · 10/09/2011 11:19

She's just given birth, is still in hospital and on facebook??!!!!! She is being very unreasonable, ignore.

LeonardNimoy · 10/09/2011 11:24

Yabu I was kept awake for 3 nights in hospital by the baby next to me and can still remember how much I desparately wanted to sleep. YABU for percieving this as a slur on BF

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Jacanne · 10/09/2011 12:03

I remember being paranoid about my first dd crying all night - wasn't just her though - she'd just get off to sleep and then another would start - did overhear a rude husband commenting on her crying to his wife - for some reason some people think that hospital curtains are sound proof. My dd was BF but I think it had more to do with my c-section - I have heard that c-section babys are often very wakeful after they are born compared to those that have struggled through the birth canal and then sleep from exhaustion. Don't know if that's true but all 3 of mine spent 3 days in hospital screaming- paid for a private room the next 2 times.

ExpensivePants · 10/09/2011 12:06

Nothing to do with bf but I assume that tempers and hormones are fraying. Mine certainly were but I was in a private room so wasn't bothered by anyone else. Yes your friend is BU but don't be too hard on her, she's probably shattered and shellshocked.

HPonEverything · 10/09/2011 12:29

Now I'm worried that if I have to stay in after giving birth and my baby cries it will upset everyone :( I was sort of expecting babies crying (my own and/or others) and not to get much sleep myself. I thought that's what happened in a post-natal ward.

Oh god something else to worry about.

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