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to be really quite cross and embarrassed

(40 Posts)
GodKeepsGiving Mon 05-Sep-11 23:08:43

A close friend who is an older mum trying to conceive again posted on her facebook page that she was 'six weeks and craving gummy worms..'. She suffered a miscarriage just before Christmas and I looked after her daughter and so I was quite closely involved, so I thought I would call her and offer congratulations - I was so pleased for her. Anyway, it turns out that it's one of these peculiarly encoded ways of supporting breast cancer, which is of course laudable, but I feel really embarrassed and a bit annoyed at being put in that position. She put the message on her page about 10 minutes ago and so I rang her feeling really excited ad happy for her. I feel really silly now. Is this unreasonable?

FabbyChic Mon 05-Sep-11 23:11:13

Aaaaah someone I know posted on their wall 14 weeks and craving Smarties! Shit we thought she was pregnant! She is 48!

pigletmania Mon 05-Sep-11 23:11:28

I have seen them, now when I see them I don't say anything as I know whats behind them. Don't worry about it

Kayano Mon 05-Sep-11 23:11:48

It's her own fault for trying to raise awareness via a method that not everyone knows about and is really annoying and
Pointless. that could have been very upsetting for her too so unsure why she would join in with that one if she is ttc
Iyswim?

I hate it

ChippingIn Mon 05-Sep-11 23:13:38

Well - tbf I would have assumed she was on a diet grin

I think it's what's going around in your own mind that influences how you 'read' it. It's understandable that you read it the way you did - but it doesn't make her wrong either.

belledechocchipcookie Mon 05-Sep-11 23:14:04

I hate it. I've had 5 bloody emails telling me what to do, 'hey girls, it's that time again...' so fucking annoying.

reelingintheyears Mon 05-Sep-11 23:14:52

Some of my friends have done this FB thing.....

'I'm 22 weeks and craving smarties' or something...

DP seriously thought that a mutual friend was pregnant until i explained it to him.

reelingintheyears Mon 05-Sep-11 23:16:25

grin at ChippingIn

Kayano Mon 05-Sep-11 23:16:37

Think the only thing it raises awareness of is the presence of sheep wink

LineRunner Mon 05-Sep-11 23:16:43

My daughter raised this with me last night as she was pretty pissed off that friends of hers who are 14 and 15 are going on facebook pretending that they are pregnant.

She wants to know HOW this does anyone any good, because these girls are certainly not donating any money to cancer research - they just think it's a giggle.

A close relative died of breast cancer and it still affects us.

I would love to know the answers.

GodKeepsGiving Mon 05-Sep-11 23:17:35

Thanks everyone. I only saw her yesterday and she was hinting that she could be pregnant. I'm not saying that she's entirely wrong to do it, just that it seems rather inappropriate when she's been so desperate to conceive. Still, hopefully she will do so and this time with a happy outcome.

madhattershouse Mon 05-Sep-11 23:17:45

Someone I know did this, she messaged me to try to get me to join in. No way am I doing that, too many would get the wrong end of the stick, many think I'm mad enough having 4 grin

missismac Mon 05-Sep-11 23:19:52

Could someone please explain it to me? I don't really get what they're alluding to.

OP, I think I'd feel the same as you. I hope your friend was apologetic about the misunderstanding?

belledechocchipcookie Mon 05-Sep-11 23:23:02

OK BEAUTIFUL LADIES!!! It's that time of year again in support of Breast Cancer Awareness! We all remember last years game of writing your bra color as your status? or the way we like to have our handbag handy?

Remember last year so many people took part that it made national news and the constant updating of status reminded everyone why we're doing this and helped raise awareness!

DO NOT tell any males what the status' mean, keep them guessing And please Broadcast this to all ur female friends to see if we can make a bigger fuss this year than last year

I did my part... So now its YOUR turn!

The idea is to choose the month You were born and the day you were born. Pass this on to the girls only and lets see how far it reaches around. The last one about the bra went round the world.

So you'll write... I'm (your birth month) weeks and I'm craving (your birth date) !!! as your status

Example: Feb 14th= I'm 2 weeks and craving chocolate mints!

January-1week
Febuary-2weeks
March-3weeks
April-4weeks
May-6weeks
June-8weeks
July-10weeks
August-12weeks
September-13weeks
October-14weeks
November-16weeks
December-18weeks

Days of the month:

1- Skittles
2- Starburst
3- Kit-Kat
4- M&M's
5- Tomatoes
6- Ice Cream
7- Dairy Milk
8- Lollipop
9- Peanut Butter Cups
10- Meat Balls
11- Twizzlers
12- Bubble Gum
13- Hershey's Kisses
14- Chocolate Mints
15- Twix
16- Cheese
17- Fudge
18- Cherry Jello
19- Banana's
20- Pickels
21- Chicken Wings
22- Skittles
23- Gummy Bears
24- Gummy Worms
25- Strawberry Pop Tarts
26- Starburst
27- Mini Eggs
28- Kit-Kat Chunkie
29- Double Chocolate Chip Chrunchy Cookies
30- Smarties
31- Chocolate Cake

GodKeepsGiving Mon 05-Sep-11 23:23:17

Missimac, I don't understand it either. She wasn't apologetic and I ended up saying sorry for assuming she was pregnant! I just think that on some level it's bad manners to allow friends and family to get excited about your much longed for pregnancy when in fact it's simply a facebook game.

HenriettaFarthingay Mon 05-Sep-11 23:25:40

I've had cancer twice (breast and lymphoma) and I avoid these things like the plague. It's supposed to raise awareness - in this day and age if women don't know basic stuff like checking their breasts regularly, this isn't going to help them. A load of tosh.

pengymum Mon 05-Sep-11 23:25:47

It is a variation on the chain letter/email theme where you will get good karma/bad luck/good luck/win the lottery/drop dead if you do/don't forward to x people shite.
I always ignore this kind of rubbish.
For me, it doesn't raise any awareness other than of how gullible people are.

madhattershouse Mon 05-Sep-11 23:25:58

I would say it is bad manners and not at all a way of promoting the awareness of anything. If she had messaged you the link at least you would have had a "heads up" but these FB things are a real pain. If you want to raise awareness just say so!

Vallhala Mon 05-Sep-11 23:28:01

Annoying and embarrassing yes, BUT it's got us talking... and a host of women across the world are reading this.

Which gives me the opportunity to repeat something I said on here before the weekend... READ ON, LADIES, PLEASE. It's important, maybe the most important thing you will ever read.

I was 37. No history of breast cancer in the family, a size 8, seven and a half stone vegetarian. I had none of the age/weight/family/diet related chances of getting breast cancer. So, although I knew it CAN hit women like me, did I check my breasts? Did I hell! Too busy being a mum, too busy having fun, too busy thinking, "It won't, it can't happen to me!"

But it did. Thirty seven years old, a lone mum to a 5 and 6 year old and BY CHANCE, just having a bath and washing normally as I did, I found a lump.

Cancer. A tiny word that nigh on blew my world apart. Had I not had small boobs and found it so early - something my docs said was a miracle given I wasn't actively checking for it - could have left my little girls in a children's home.

Most women in that position wouldn't have been so lucky and wouldn't have found the lump without actively checking... so most would be dead by now.

So do something for me, for you, for your DHs/DPs, your Mums and Dads, your siblings and your children... and check your breasts before you go to bd tonight and every month thereafter. See your GP surgery nurse and ask her how to do it properly and tell all your friends and family to do it too, men included.... and get THEM to tell THEIR DWs/DPs/mums/sisters and friends to do so.

Yep, that FB campaign is a PITA.... but we're talking about it, other women are reading this... so pass the message on.

Don't be a statistic on the death sheets for the sake of 5 minutes checking, for the sake of thinking it can't happen to you.

Hatesponge Mon 05-Sep-11 23:30:54

I've had several emails about this on FB.

I don't tend to join in these chain status things, I did once re bra colour and it opened a bit of a can of worms. So now I stay well out!

Plus given that the somewhat arid state of my love life is well known among my FB friends, if I did post '14 weeks..' etc people would be on the phone to the Vatican reporting a second immaculate conception grin

GodKeepsGiving Mon 05-Sep-11 23:32:23

Pengymum, that's exactly how I feel: gullible. I feel that these statuses are slightly perverse when someone has had a miscarriage and is trying to conceive. Actually, it's really quite a poor way to treat friends who are genuinely excited. I feel so cross that I have seemed naive and silly. I shan't make the same mistake again.

storminabuttercup Mon 05-Sep-11 23:33:27

I did the same op, I asked someone what they meant, said friend is gay and has always said she will never have kids, I was like confused

I hate hate hate these silly games, i see it as a way of attention seeking, how on earth it promotes awareness of breast cancer I don't know!

I suspect you won't be the only person congratulating this friend, she may end up regretting her participation!

reelingintheyears Mon 05-Sep-11 23:34:03

Hey Valhalla....i saw your previous posts about this subject and you are right that it gets people talking.

I had no idea it was about breast cancer awareness...i just ignored the posts because they were silly and said they were just about confusing the men..confused

Sookeh Mon 05-Sep-11 23:34:42

My friend did this, I sent her a text asking if she was pregnant and got "don't be so bloody stupid" as a replyhmm

PotPourri Mon 05-Sep-11 23:35:35

I can guarantee people would think I was preggars if I put that on my status. It's obvious that people would, especially if you are the type that has been pregnant alot! (or I suppose you have been TTC or summit)

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