Another gift giving AIBU...

[smoggii]

We buy (xmas and birthday) for cousin's DD, she has just turned 7. I emailed my cousin to ask what DD was into at the mo so I could get something she would like. I do this with all the kids I buy for, it helps me get something in the right area that will go down well but allows me to shop around, as we are on a (v tight) budget, and buy some bargains while they are still young enough not to care.

Last year (when age 6) 'she' wanted a family game for the Wii, bit more than we usually spend but as she'd asked, that's what we got.

This year 'she' wants money...she's 7. I asked what she was into, so my cousin didn't actually answer the question.

AIBU to think that it is my cousin who wants her to have money and at 7 she wont really care either way?

Also do I have to give £25 as that is what we spent on the game last year. I don't think we can afford that.

[AgentZigzag]

That's the thing about asking what they want, you kind of have to go along with the answer

She might be saving up for something big?

I would give what you normally do, £10-15 would be how much I normally shell out.

[caughtinanet]

You are very generous to be buying anything for a cousin's child unless you are very close to your cousin.

£10 would be my suggestion, ime £25 for a 7yo is just too much.

[MrsHairyWhitemouse]

Give what you normally spend - a tenner?

The fact that you put thought into it and usually manage to find a bargain, means she's going to get less of a 'good deal' from you. Don't spend what you haven't got.

[ChippingIn]

Why not ring your cousins DD and just talk to her. You don't have to ask what she wants for christmas, just chat with her.

[slavetofilofax]

I'd give a tenner. That's plenty for a 7yo. I'd bet the 7yo doesn't really want money though and would prefer something to open.

But my 11yo is more than happy with a birthday tenner, that really is enough if you decide to give money.

[smoggii]

It really is my own fault for asking what she was into but I genuinely wasn't expecting her to say money, I was expecting 'she loves disney princessess or high school musical'.

caughtinanet we were very close when her DD was small, we have drifted and no longer live near each other but I don't like to just stop buying and we always see each other for an hour on special occasions.

I too thought 7 yr olds preferred to open presents but the times they are a changing x

[kalo12]

i would give her a tenner too.

[twooter]

My 8yo loves getting money

[Talker2010]

Call back and ask what the money is towards that way you could give a suitable gift card/voucher ... marginally more exciting than cash for a 7 year old

£10 is plenty

[HeadfirstForHalos]

DD1 is 9 next week, and the same as the last two years she is desperately hoping to get money rather than presents so she can have a mini spending spree. She has never really liked any specific type of present, I could never have told a relative the type of thing she liked. Some things just grab her for no particular reason.

[HeadfirstForHalos]

Oh and a 10 pound note is FANTASTIC at that age, it's more than enough :)

[iscream]

You do not have to give the value of what you have spent in the past. Since I do not know prices in the UK, can't really say.
I would probably try and find a present anyways, if you think it is the mom's idea about money. This sort of happened to me, I asked, they "didn't know, and suggested money". Since the parents are not very responsible, I did not want to give money, sadly the bf would have no qualms of "borrowing" it and not replace it.
Some classic childrens dvd's, and a special fleecy blanket to cuddle in and watch it would be nice.

[IloveJudgeJudy]

Why don't you buy her some special pens and paper. Ime little girls always like that.

[HappyMummyOfOne]

I'd ask her yourself what she would like. I'm not keen on giving money at the best of times, lease of all to a child. If she is saving for something large, then i'd get her a voucher for the store needed - at least that way you know the money will get spent on the child and not disappear into the household pot.

[Balsam]

Get her a gift voucher for ELC or Disney Store or Toys R Us or anywhere else that only sells kids' stuff.

[SquishyCinnamonSwirls]

Crafting stuff always go down well with dd (aged 8), or stationery - novelty rubbers in particular.
A month's subscription to moshi monsters would be good as well.

I dislike giving money too as it just seems so uninspired, but I agree with other posters that say a tenner is plenty.

[ImperialBlether]

I'd get her a voucher for Claire's Accessories or somewhere similar. If you give money, you might find she doesn't actually get it.

Just out of interest, does your cousin buy you or your children a gift when it's your birthdays?

[Jodianna]

Book tokens for the under thirteens, Boots tokens for the over thirteens, unless book tokens are requested. That way, they get the dosh, and get to choose what they want.

[takethisonehereforastart]

Agree with everyone, give her vouchers for somewhere (ideally a book token in our house) and £10 is plenty for a 7 year old. I know that now you can get some vouchers that a group of shops will accept, rather than just one particular shop, and some shopping centres and retail parks do them for the stores they have on site.

She can still have her shopping trip, if that's what she wants, but from your POV a voucher is still something you have bought and sent to her and so is a little more personal.

[RockStockAndTwoOpenBottles]

yy to vouchers for somewhere like Waterstones or Amazon. If it is to be cash I wouldn't give more than £10 to a 7yo.

[Greenshadow]

Amazon vouchers are good for older children (my teenage DSs would not be impressed by Boots vouchers), although they do look a bit boring to actually hand over.

[SouthernFriedTofu]

I think if you ask what a 7 year old is in to, money should not be the response! maybe a 10 pound voucher?

[smoggii]

imperialblether she is a bit hit and miss on gifts but i don't mind, i do enjoy gift giving, i'm a shopaholic (love bargain hunting) so maybe i'm just a bit gutted that the fun has been removed

TBH my cousin is a bit on the broke side at the mo and i do worry about the money getting 'accidentally' used and not replaced, but, if it helps the family then it is still a gift to the child in a roundabout way!

I like the amazon/multistore voucher idea. They seem to sell everything on amazon these days.

[SE13Mummy]

How about doing a bit of both? You could buy her a book (my DD who is nearly 7 loves the Usborne 'see inside' series and the re-released Puffin classics e.g. Heidi/The Little Princess) and put a voucher for Claire's Accessories or maybe Accessorize (brilliant at sale time especially) in a card.

You could, of course, e-mail your cousin back, remind her of your shopaholism and explain that buying her DD a gift is a fantastic excuse for you to indulge and that even if you send her money you'd like to shop for 'a little something for her to unwrap'. It might yield a bit more information...

7-year-olds I know (I'm a KS2 teacher) seem to be into everything from Sylvanian Families, Moshi Monsters, Build-a-bear, gel pens, sparkly stuff (stickers, stampers, craft things), Roald Dahl/Michael Morpurgo/younger Jacqueline Wilsons, Horrible Histories, chemistry/gem stone kits, paper doll fashions, doodling and spirographs to iPods, iPhones and Blackberries (non-edible variety).