... to smile and make eye contact with people

[Bennifer]

I just wondered how other people feel about this. If I'm going along a fairly quiet street and I pass someone, I tend to smile and make eye contact (and maybe say Good Morning). Now, I don't do this walking down Oxford Street, but I grew up in the suburbs and just seemed something I was brought up to do.

I'm surprised at how many people don't do this. Is this normal? Is this some strange cultural thing that people have forgotten? AIBU to smile and make eye contact?

[DoMeDon]

Yanbu - called being friendly - totally normal but a dying art

[munstersmum]

Get thee to the sticks. It's compulsory to say make eye contact and say good morning.

[cuteboots]

yanbu- I spoke to my neighbour last week as shes away alot so I havent seen her really since moving into my house. She lookd at me like id just landed in my spaceship and quickly went back into her house!?? I think domedon has hit the nail on the head.

[Bennifer]

mumsnetmum,

I already live in Exeter, a smallish city, so I'd expect more people to do it there

[Bennifer]

sorry, that should have been munstermum

[Toobluntforboss]

I do this too - everyone does this in N Ireland (where I'm from) and I like it when people do but sadly I sometimes get strange 'who are you/what are you doing?' looks! Still do it though!

[Bennifer]

There must be a whole host of people who find smiling at people on the streets weird

[PeanutGallery]

YABU

[cardibach]

You're lucky if you get away with just a smile and 'Hello' round here! Can take ages to get anything done :) I like it.

[chirpchirp]

YANBU, It's nice to be nice!

My random acts of kindness have also provoked very strange responses. No, I'm not hitting on you...No I'm not trying to rob you...IM JUST BEING FUCKING NICE. OK!

[TrillianAstra]

Depends how creepy you are when you are doing it...

[munstersmum]

From the top of my soapbox;
everyone should smile as a bare minimum
I also grant you permission to speak to each other on the tube

[vickibee]

It is the norm where I Live.
However I did live near Farnborough for a few years and took the same train every morn with the same people and they would rather look at their feet or read the paper than speak. I found it very rude and am gald to be back in Yorkshire

[RedOnion]

I always do it, it has become a habit now because I used to have to force myself to do it to get over crippling social anxiety.

[Angel786]

Next you'll want tomake eye contact with, or worse still chat to people on the tube (God forbid)! I pass the same people walking to work in London every day and started to smile and say hi to a security man who responded with a nod and "hello". Everyone-else just looks away. Awkward.

[ZombiePlan]

YABU. It is IMO a bit weird to try to engage with people you've never met when you have no reason to do so (obv different if you need to e.g. say 'excuse me' or something like that). On the odd occasion some overly friendly person smiles/talks to me, I find it rather uncomfortable - I simply don't want to engage with random strangers, yet I feel that ignoring them would be rude.

[Bennifer]

I've only ever lived in London for a very short period, so I didn't pick up the London point of view. It's mainly when I'm walking around my neighbourhood, down at the shops, etc, rather than going down the high street.

[cardibach]

But ZombiePlan you do have a reason to engage with random people. It's called politeness and friendliness. It's for the good of the community. I really don't understand that 'I don't know you so I have no connection with you and will ignore you' attitude.

[golemmings]

Having grown up in the midlands, I tried smiling at people when I moved to Reading. I gave up when I realised that making eye contact clearly made me a social pariah or, more likely, a 5'2 female child molester. It took me a couple of months to find a job back in a civilized part of the world and I try not to go back to the south if I can help it.

[F1lthym1ndedvixen]

if you're having a bad day, some pleasant human contact, even on a tiny scale can really help.
You keep on smiling, chick!

[Claw3]

No one around here makes eye contact or smiles, these are signs of either being drunk or a serial killers round these parts.

The only time you are allowed to talk to someone is to ask the time, directions or if you are taller than person in supermarket, they can ask you to reach something for them, but only if they are elderly.

[ZombiePlan]

Cardibach - I honestly don't think that not talking to random strangers makes you rude, or unfriendly. Perhaps it's just that it's more of a London thing - when there are so many poeple crammed into a small space, you really do need to kind of 'tune out' everyone else (esp in v crowded places like the tube).

[Bennifer]

I would say, even in London, it would make sense to smile at someone as not every street is piccadilly circus. I'll stick at it I think, as a good 50% probably smile back

[soundchic]

So different with children though. If my LO says hello to someone and doesn't get one back he will follow them repeating hello until he gets a response. I think its hilarious.

[YouDoTheMath]

Went to a friend's baby shower recently. I was one of the last to arrive, walked in, smiled and said hello to everyone. Didn't get much in the way of a hello from anyone and no smiles - all strangers to me as well so it wasn't as if i'd had a chance to upset them!

Guess they were all happy in their clique and didn't feel the need to make the effort with someone new.