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to want to change my job - despite prospect of substantial drop in income

(11 Posts)
zoflora Fri 26-Aug-11 16:16:12

more of a wwyd -

have recently become very unhappy at work due to one person who is new to the organisation and senior. I feel I just cannot work with this person. However there is nothing I can do to change the situation from within - it is more of a personality clash than anything concrete like bullying or inappropriate behaviour. Anyway it is bad enough that after our clashes I have trouble sleeping at night and had at one point considerered handing in notice. I have been in the workforce for many years and get on with most people well- I have truly never experienced anything like this.
Without going into detail I know that any other job I am likely to get will pay less - possibly substantially so (though might be more interesting) This would be fine by me except have childcare costs and may end up barely being able to cover them. But in just over a years time my childcare bill will decrease substantially.
So - should I try to bite the bullet and ride it out although it is making me really stressed and affecting my family? Or shall I get my cv out? I know it is a decision only I can make but I'd be interested in other people's perspectives - especially anyone who has been in a similar situation. it is all whirling round and round in my head at the moment...

redexpat Fri 26-Aug-11 16:56:47

Well if you were skint would that also make you stressed? Skint stress vs colleague stress.

I would update CV, apply for various things and see what comes up. It might take a year to find something.

janx Fri 26-Aug-11 17:00:59

I could be writing this - except the person in question has been there nearly 3 years. I have been with the organization for nearly ten years. Is it just you that doesn't get on with the person? Fortunately for me all the team loathe our manager so I don't feel so alone. However I find it is getting worse. Is there anyone you can talk to about the situation? I have developed strategies to cope with her and luckily I work three days a week so don't have to suffer her patronizing attitude all the time...but it is hard.
I am looking around for something else but there is so little going. I think if it is making you really unhappy then why not see what else it out there

zoflora Fri 26-Aug-11 17:27:22

Thanks janx

What are your strategies???

No, it is not quite just that we don't get on - some of those under this person have a problem too. As far as i'm aware she's held in esteem by those on same level and above.
However have a particular problem with it because I work in a sort of niche of the firm and have been accustomed for years to doing the day to day tasks my job with very little interference- so probably makes it harder for me to swallow. New person very controlling. patronising micromanager - also very difficult to have a converatation with as does not listen to or take on board anything . But in the bits where I would actually welcome managerial input - e.g. where I am senior enough in the organisation to make a lone decision - the person is very unsupportive.

zoflora Fri 26-Aug-11 17:41:58

I know it would do no harm to look around - will probably do so.

But concerned that I am being a total and utter pathetic wuss for potentially letting this drive me away from what is otherwise a good job - especially when my position will be so much better in a years time. I know it is so minor compared to what others have to suffer in work
- am I just being a bit precious?

janx Fri 26-Aug-11 19:53:15

I think we are talking about the same person grin... she was brought it as another layer of management when and my other colleagues were doing fine by ourselves. About a year ago I was hauled in for shouting at her - that was a low moment and from then on I thought right I am going to have to deal with this. I make sure I am one step ahead of her and have managed to let her think she is making the decisions when it fact it is what I want to happen. She thinks she is really clever but she is sadly transparent! I am going through another annoying phase with her and she has recently made some inappropriate comments about my family which has made me seethe

zoflora Tue 30-Aug-11 12:19:57

Thanks janx- mine is also the result of a change in management structure. Why can't people leave things alone - they were fine as they were smile

cuteboots Tue 30-Aug-11 13:57:36

Hello! Had to comment on this one as well. We now have new management in place and being honest luv the job but the other bits are now making me reconsider. Having been here for years it would mean probably a huge pay drop but weigh that up against being unhappy every day and taking it out on family surely thats not good is it?

Insomnia11 Tue 30-Aug-11 14:05:27

Have a think about whether you want to do something completely different or if it's just that particular organisation or indeed that particular person you have a problem with.

I've just handed in my notice to set up my own business, and do PT work elsewhere. Massive change, and we will be skint, but I decided skint stress while I was doing something I loved was worth it vs more financial security with work stress that was making me physically and mentally ill.

I thought about it for a long time though (since before I qualified as a solicitor 8 years ago I was thinking of ways to escape!) and tried different jobs in different environments first, to make sure that it really was the wrong line of work and not just the environment or any particular job that was the problem.

tethersend Tue 30-Aug-11 14:10:29

How long has she ben there?

Could her 'style' of management be because she feels threatened by your experience and insecure in her role?

I would try one last attempt to kill her with kindness- go out of your way to be nice to her, and see what she does. It sometimes works IME. Speak to her manager. I know you say it's not bullying, but if she is giving you sleepless nights, she is not doing her job well.

However, if you have to leave, leave- just make sure you have exhausted every avenue of dealing with this first.

shakey1500 Tue 30-Aug-11 14:31:11

Also had to comment with my experience. Not on the same level as yourself but ten years ago in London I was putting in 60 odd hours a week (and getting paid for 37) in retail management. It was extremely demanding mentally and somewhat physically. It was the only career I knew having started as a YTS (anyone remember them?) 15 years previously.

I was seriously burnt out and often in tears with the pressure. Travelling home one day I saw an advert for barrier staff on London Underground, significantly less wages but something, just something sparked in me. Passed the interviews and accepted the job. Hand on heart, it was THE best descision I've ever made. No more keys, no more budgets, no more management responsibilites. I felt like an enormous weight had been lifted off my shoulders. In my opinion, getting rid of the stress was well worth the drop in salary and eventually, when I felt ready I began to work my way up in the company. I just needed that few years break. As it happens, I left when we relocated due to being pregnant with ds and I was sad to leave but have fond memories.

Hope you find less stress whatever you decide smile

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