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AIBU?

help and advice

206 replies

FondantFancie · 26/08/2011 11:26

My husband thinks he is entitled to half my child tax credits. We have three children together which we share contact exactly half and half. we have been separated for 3 years now. I have just recently had a new baby so am not working and just claiming the benefits I am entitled to. He is a full time teacher.

He feels that he is entitled to the tax credit money while I do not as he is working. He puts the children into childcare which costs him a lot each month. He claims not to have any money to spend on himself or the children. What should I do?

OP posts:

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olderyetwider · 26/08/2011 11:35

I think he's being perfectly reasonable. You share the children, you share the expense, so you should share the financial help. If it came to a choice I'd say he should have the tax credits as he is the one with child care costs to enable him to work

PrincessScrumpy · 26/08/2011 11:41

hmmmmm, tax credits are worked out on your income, so he would need to claim himself, seperately. But, as a full time teacher he may not be entitled. He should however be able to claim childcare vouchers through work (to get tax relief on childcare costs) which comes to about £50 a month that you get back if you get the maximum number of vouchers (depends how much he spends on childcare).

Child benefit may be another issue as that belongs to the children - if you buy all the clothes, shoes etc then you will get this, but if he does this too then you may need to split it.

FondantFancie · 26/08/2011 11:45

He says that he is entitled to tax credits but the tax credit people can only pay to one parent, so he cannot claim.

OP posts:

olderyetwider · 26/08/2011 11:47

Why not see who would get more, that person claim it, then split it?

borderslass · 26/08/2011 11:49

If you share contact 50/50 he is entitled to half of what you get for 3 of your children but not half altogether as the baby isn't his and I assume you get child tax credits for the baby.

FondantFancie · 26/08/2011 11:50

I would get more, but I do not see why I should have to split it. The tax credits were given to me and he has a job to get his money.

OP posts:

borderslass · 26/08/2011 11:53

Child tax credits are for helping you look after and buy things for the children though.

olderyetwider · 26/08/2011 11:54

Blimey Fondant, a job isn't a perk you know! He has costs for child care so he can work (and pay taxes). Your last post sounds a teeny bit entitled!

talkingnonsense · 26/08/2011 11:55

If you share the care you should share the credits, unless you pay for all their clothing/ shoes/ clubs and hobbies and he doesn't.

scrambedeggs · 26/08/2011 11:57

of course he is!

LadyThumb · 26/08/2011 11:57

YABVU - half and half care, half and half benefits. His having a job has nothing to do with it.

Imnotaslimjim · 26/08/2011 12:02

Of course he's entitled to some of the CTC, he has the children half the time. You would be better off letting him claim and giving you half tbh. Though I don't know how that would work with regards to the new baby, it seems a fairly complicated situation

tethersend · 26/08/2011 12:03

This almost definitely not made up.

ShirleyKnot · 26/08/2011 12:05

Why have you put this second thread up?

glitterkitten · 26/08/2011 12:10

Blimey!!

That money isn't for you - it's for your children. That is the vital cog your machinery seems to be missing.

FondantFancie · 26/08/2011 12:29

Sorry Tethersend, not sure I understand your post?

I posted twice as I was unsure where to post this, and I wanted opinions.

But the government gave me the money, he appealed through the Tax Credit people and they still ruled in my favour, surely that means that I am able to spend this money how I want?

OP posts:

olderyetwider · 26/08/2011 12:46

The government gave you the money? No, actually, the tax-payers 'gave' you the money to spend on care of your children. If you share the care, and the costs, then you share the help.

It doesn't sound like the tax credit people 'ruled in your favour' but that the rules are that you can't both claim seperately so you have it.

Your ex is struggling to pay child care so that he can work, and pay taxes, in part to support you! But you want the money to spend how you want! Your attitude makes me fume

FondantFancie · 26/08/2011 12:51

But he is a teacher, he gets paid good money, he probably takes in more money than I get. Why should I give him even more?

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TeddyRuxpin · 26/08/2011 13:01

Tax credits get paid to the "main carer" of the children.
As you are no longer a couple and split the care 50/50 this makes you both the "main carer" as far as I see and the tax credits should be split 50/50. Unfortunately, the tax credit people won't do this as the rules are only one person can claim so I expect that is why they 'ruled in your favour' as you put it. It doesn't mean your XP has no entitlement to the money!
Could you work out an arrangement that you buy all the childrens clothes/shoes/extras from the tax credit money so your XP doesn't have this expense?
Tax credits and child benefit are meant to be to provide things for the children, not enhance the parents quality of life.

ShirleyKnot · 26/08/2011 13:02

Because he's paying for the childcare?

Are you actually a bit.

no.

magicmummy1 · 26/08/2011 13:02

The money is intended for your children. It isn't a salary for you.

You do sound very "entitled". Are you really serious about this, or are you actually the husband playing devil's advocate?

PenguinArmy · 26/08/2011 13:04

how much would be get if he was the full time carer

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Snapespeare · 26/08/2011 13:04

Are the children in childcare full time, while you are on maternity leave?

So you could technically be looking after the children while he is working, to reduce the expenses? Do you receive any tax credit towards the childcare expenses?

delilahbelle · 26/08/2011 13:10

community.tes.co.uk/forums/t/513798.aspx

V similar thread from his POV over on TES at the moment.

pink4ever · 26/08/2011 13:10

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