Kids were with grandparents last night so DH and I had planned to go for a meal. Last week when it first came up he suggested I wear a certain dress. I agreed and he kept going on about it (like he does ) but last night I felt it was too cold for it so decided not to wear it after all. He said "oh, I thought you were wearing that blue dress?!" so I said I felt it was too cold. He sulked and said "but you promised" err no I didn't and its hardly a big deal, I wear what I want.
So instead I wore black skinny jeans with a sparkly top. Therefore I was still "dressed up" and it was obvious I wasn't just popping down to tesco for a pint of milk iyswim.
I made an effort with my hair, make up etc and then came down to find DH wearing old jeans with a small tear in the knee, an old t-shirt and trainers. Not the first time he's gone to a resteraunt dressed like this but last night it pissed me off. I said "are you going out like that??" and he said "yes, what's wrong with it?" so I got quite cross and said how dare he make a fuss over what I wear when he just goes dressed in scruffy day-time clothes. I said I wouldn't go out with him dressed like that and I felt it was disrespectful to the resteraunt and mainly disrespectful to me. He went off in a mjor mood and said "well you better iron me a shirt then". When I refused to do that we very nearly ended up not going out at all (in fact I didn't want to by this point).
It sounds like he was trying to make a point, in a tit-for-tat kind of way - ie, 'if she's not going to make the effort, neither will I' - which is pretty bloody childish, to be honest, and I would have been cross with that part of it, and even crosser with the ironing comment. YANBU.
Well personally I wouldn't have minded what my DH put on (unless it is his running gear - which he looks nice in but is not appropriate) but he doesn't tell me what to wear. I'm not his doll FFS (maybe a fertility symbol : ).
DH often asks that I wear a certain dress when going out, because it specifically floats it boat compared to others iyswim But he is a scruff and often goes out looking like a hobo (sometimes even when he tries to dress smart ha ha ha). I'm ok with that, it doesn't bother me - that's who he is.
Like raveningwolef says, there's obviously something more going on here?