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ds thinks adult neighbor hates him

(5 Posts)
mattsmadmum Mon 22-Aug-11 15:00:09

lived almost next door for almost 20yrs. the mum always been a bit funny and can honestly say i have never said more than hello to her as if you try to she shuns me. kids at same school-never really played as hers older-then they began to-hers here all day and i mean all day-all of a sudden they stopped coming over-and she began ignoring us at school ect.-her hubby dosent but dont know him that much either-last week my ds asked me why the whole family now hate him and wont play or talk. really dont know what we have done-have no mutual friends so told son it was me they hated not him-dont know what else to do -will see her later at dance class should i say something?-i think someone has been stirring trouble any ideas?

fabanflabby Mon 22-Aug-11 15:22:24

I would definitely ask her if there is a problem? I'd say there appears to be an atmosphere and you would like to know why. If she thinks there is a problem she should at least give you the opportunity to discuss?
As long as you are reasonable and pleasant then youve done everything you can to open a dialogue.
At least you will know what the issue is - if there is one!
Good luck.

worraliberty Mon 22-Aug-11 15:24:47

Why didn't you tell your child to ask the kids what's up?

ObiWan Mon 22-Aug-11 15:28:22

Are you sure tht any of them 'hate' either of you?

If there is an age difference, and the only interaction between the children has been for a few weeks over the summer, perhaps the novelty has just worn off?

Perhaps the people next door prefer to keep their neighbours at a distance.

Don't approach her assuming that something is wrong, just say hi, and mention what fun your son had over the summer.

NorfolkBroad Mon 22-Aug-11 16:36:59

I was in a similar situation last year. Wont bore you all with the finer details but anyway after several weeks of being ignored by a previously friendly mum at school (We had had a slight misunderstanding over a playdate in the holidays). I asked her what was wrong. She was emphatic that she was absolutely fine, wasn't ignoring me and that I was being very oversensitive. Whatever! I wasn't imagining it but anyway it sort of cleared the air. We are not great friends anyway but I just didn't like the sort of tension this created and simply asking the question made me feel better. I hate confrontation so this was a big achievement for me. I would definitely do it again. Ask her this evening in a nice way and then at least you won't be left wondering!

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