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to be disappointed and fed up even though I know they're right?

(17 Posts)
featherbag Mon 15-Aug-11 22:54:50

Hi all. I'm somewhere in the region of 25-27 weeks pregnant (depending on whose measurements/dates you take), and due to go on holiday on Friday. We had an all inclusive fortnight in Turkey planned, booked a week before we found out I was pregnant. I've been to the MW today, and she says my blood pressure's up, I'm further on than my 'fit to fly' letter is based on, and she's not too keen on me going to Turkey but will let the consultant I'm seeing tomorrow make the final decision. My DH and I have discussed it, and have decided we'd really be ridiculous to go to Turkey for 2 weeks if there's even the slightest, remotest chance of any detrimental effects on the baby, so whatever the consultant says, we're not going. If the consultant isn't wiling to agree in writing we'll lose £1500. I'm so, so disappointed!!! My grown-up head knows the holiday probably wasn't a good idea in the first place (have had quite a few scary complications with the pregnancy), but my inner toddler is stamping her feet and wanting to throw an almighty tantrum! AIBU to be gutted at the same time as accepting we just can't go and hoping we get the money back? DH doesn't seem to understand I can be upset without thinking it's the wrong decision.

featherbag Mon 15-Aug-11 22:56:16

Should add, I took a bit of convincing to reach the above decision, the 'they' I'm referring to in the title is MW and DH.

hester Mon 15-Aug-11 22:56:38

Oh, poor you. I understand totally.

squeakytoy Mon 15-Aug-11 22:58:23

I would have thought your consultant would be happy to agree in writing that it is inadvisable for you to fly, so you shouldnt lose out financially.

CocoPopsAddict Mon 15-Aug-11 22:59:34

Time to butter up the consultant then...

thisisyesterday Mon 15-Aug-11 22:59:38

i would go anyway tbh, esp if the consultant says it's ok

i think a nice relaxing fortnight in Turkey is maybe just the thing for bringing your blood pressure down

naught Mon 15-Aug-11 23:02:49

Your consultant will write the letter, it will take about 6 weeks for the money to come in and then you can buy yourself a new front room carpet. grin
12 years ago I could of written your post word for word (except I was week 24) and my consultant was brilliant. As it happens it is a good job we didn't go away, as I had ds before my flight date.

BerryMojito Mon 15-Aug-11 23:05:21

I don't think your reaction is unreasonable at all. If there is a chance that things could go wrong you will be much happier in familiar surroundings. What I do think is unreasonable, however, is booking an all inclusive in Turkey - the TL is really weak against the pound at the moment and you'd get much more for your money by going self-catering! wink

naught Mon 15-Aug-11 23:06:17

sorry that should of been before my flight date HOME the thought of having a baby in greece (where I would of been) filled my dreams for quite a few years

piprabbit Mon 15-Aug-11 23:06:42

Your consultant will probably be more than happy to support your decision.

But, whatever you do with the money, don't buy a new carpet until the weaning and potty training phases are over.

featherbag Mon 15-Aug-11 23:08:17

thisisyesterday, the reason we're not risking it is I was already at risk of early delivery, then have found out more complications which raise the risk even more, plus I'm further on than we thought, plus I'm ticking a few boxes for risk of pre-eclampsia. Don't really fancy losing my child for the sake of a holiday, Turkey's neonatal care has nowhere near as good survival rates for very premature infants as the UK! Had you gone through what we have already, believe me when I say you wouldn't risk it either!!!

featherbag Mon 15-Aug-11 23:09:52

Hadn't thought of that re carpet, haven't started thinking like a mum yet obviously!

naught Mon 15-Aug-11 23:10:12

Pre- eclampsia is not good, thats what I had with ds.
Sorry thats the last thing you want to hear.
SO what are you going to spend your unexpected cash on? - something really nice I hope

naught Mon 15-Aug-11 23:11:47

yeah, that carpet was a complete waste of money, we had moved before potty training, so the new owners got all the joy.
So No, don't buy a carpet.

featherbag Mon 15-Aug-11 23:14:55

I was thinking a week in a posh hotel within driving distance of home, with some nice days out/restaurant trips, then spend the rest on baby things. We've just moved house, and decorated the new one top to bottom before we moved in, so nothing to spend money on there!

naught Mon 15-Aug-11 23:19:39

Ooh a Posh Hotel, that sounds lovely, might be nice to see if you can go to one which do treatments which pregnant women can have, you deserve it.

featherbag Mon 15-Aug-11 23:31:10

Thanks, I'm working hard to find and focus on a bright side, think I'm just feeling a bit sorry for myself too as was sent home from work to 'rest' (not even vaguely possible at work in my job) and I detest being off work!! Going to attempt sleep now and keep fingers crossed for consultant appointment.

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