We are going to stay with MIL for 3 weeks out the country, during which time we will be inside the house quite a lot.
She is an overbearing matriarch for whom it is her way or the high way. I need a strategy.
Some examples of what I am up against:
DH will never back me up over anything his mother does, no matter how dangerous, contrary to reason or plain madness.
- She tried to feed 3 month old DS1 a banana when I caught her.
- Dragged a screaming DS1 from my arms when he was sick, because 'she wanted a go'
- Thinks car seats are neurotic and secondary to her need to wave us off at the airport rather than home.
- DH wants me to cook for the family 'to show [MIL] my skills' so she knows I am looking after him!
- That DCs should be dragged round stranger relations past their bedtime, where they are expected to be immaculately behaved or their are catsbum faces at me. If I suggest we should go home and put them into bed DH and MIL accuse me of BU.
- MIL gets me to prepare food and clear up the house before her other guests come round.
- Told to give DS2 a cup of herbal tea to settle his tummy (EBF and 3 months old)
- Giving DS1 yogurt mixed with granulated sugar, because he likes the taste
- Buying toys clearly marked as unsuitable for under 3s and gettinghuffy when I won't let DCs play with them
I could go on ALL DAY. But am going so may as well make the best of it.
I saw "smile and nod" on another thread... so was wondering, how to mentally prepare for the 'quiet war'.
I have previously tried resistance with a smile. This time was thinking smile and nod.
Coping mechanisms wanted!!!!