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to be annoyed at grandparents always demanding that we visit?

(4 Posts)
Tigerinmysoup Fri 12-Aug-11 17:11:27

Message left on my answerphone today from my Nan (DS' great-nan):

"Put Grandad out of his misery. He keeps asking me when Tigerinmysoup is coming over with DS. Can you ring me and let me know when you're coming over?"

What really pisses me off is why it's so hard for them to call and actually invite us over or ask if they can come here (we live 10 mins away) - it's the manner in which they demand we go over there, and it's as if I'm in the wrong for not having visited recently.

My mum has had to put up with this all her life and never says anything to them, but moans constantly about how my Nan will never ever phone her to see how she is etc, but always expects to be called instead and invited places.

At the moment, I would rather boil my own head than spend an afternoon there - I'm 7 months pregnant and exhausted and it's hard enough chasing DS around as it is, let alone at the trinket-filled treasure trove that is their house - although I don't mind them coming here.

We haven't seen them in a few weeks. Last time I hadn't seen them in a while, I received a shitty phonecall from her demanding to know where I'd been for the last x days as I hadn't been answering the home phone. I replied that we do go out quite a lot and that if it was so important she could have called my mobile. She ignored me.

I just feel like being petty and ignoring the message rather than being the dutiful grandaughter and doing what I'm told. I know they're old, but is that a valid excuse to be so bloody rude and demanding?

worraliberty Fri 12-Aug-11 17:13:10

I don't find that message rude or demanding confused

YouDoTheMath Fri 12-Aug-11 17:14:31

Ignore it until they find the manners to ask nicely.

redexpat Fri 12-Aug-11 17:17:09

That does sound annoying and one sided. Perhaps you could say that you only visit when invited? And that being 7 months pregnant you just don't feel up to it, but perhaps they would like to visit you?

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