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AIBU?

To ask you to read this letter for me?!

76 replies

hellospoon · 27/07/2011 14:23

I started a thread last night about my next door neighbour and their dog, here

I have decided to write them a letter and have drafted it up, anyone fancy reading it for me to see what you think?

OP posts:

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joric · 27/07/2011 14:25

Yes- I can't find it though??

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NewbeeMummy · 27/07/2011 14:28

no letter?

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hellospoon · 27/07/2011 14:32

Sorry here it is;

Hi,
We are writing due to the increased disturbance from your dogs, we have previously discussed this issue with yourselves however it seems that attempt has failed miserably.
It really is getting to breaking point now, we have really had enough of the regular yapping and barking it is starting to affect our lives on a worrying level, Our daughter some nights is not getting to sleep till gone 9pm as whenever we get her off to sleep she is startled by the dog coming out and just as she is back to sleep it starts again this is not healthy for a 16 month old baby to be going to bed so late! She is miserable the next day and always playing catch up with her sleeping adding fuel to the fire is that your dog is often back out again between 7am & 8am waking us all up again to start the day. We do not need your dogs as an alarm clock we are able to wake ourselves up!! Chris also has to be up at 5am for work so when he is awake till 10 ? 11pm after getting the baby to sleep he is also shattered all because of a dog that is not ours. Some afternoons we can?t have our back door open as the dogs are constantly barking and we just do not want to sit listening to it.
Yesterday evening (the 26th) proved that you are either totally oblivious to your dogs or that you just have no respect for us as neighbours what so ever, when i came round at almost 9pm you knew exactly why i was there and said you would bring your dog in, this is after 2 HOURS of listening to the dog outside going YAP YAP YAP as you can imagine 2 HOURS of listening to this can cause anyone to feel annoyed!
Why as a neighbour and a decent family would you feel it is acceptable to leave your dog outside causing a total nuisance of itself for that amount of time? You are obviously aware of it so why are letting it do this? It is irresponsible as dog owners to do this and maybe the animal would be better suited to a family that will give it full attention rather than being left outside to disturb everyone around it.
I would also ask how you would feel if after a nightshift at work if you came home to bed and your neighbour was disrupting your sleep or right to live in a reasonable amount of peace? I doubt that you would be happy with it, so why do you feel it is acceptable to disrupt us in such a way?
Now we are unsure if the reason you are doing this is due to the tree in the back garden damaging your garden, as explained we spoke to the landlord and she is not prepared to do anything until it causes damage to her property, your landlord is more than welcome to have the tree removed at his expense and we would accommodate this no problem at all however it is out of our hands and we do not feel we should be punished due to our landlord not wanting to spend money.
We really hope that we can move forward and get past this issue, we do not plan to move from this house for a long time and would hope that we can get along with our neighbours this is why we are writing to you instead of just going ahead and reporting the issues to the council. Please do something about the dogs as we are unsure how much longer we are prepared to take this for.
Kind Regards

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SoupDragon · 27/07/2011 14:34

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SoupDragon · 27/07/2011 14:35

Makes you sound like

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thisisyesterday · 27/07/2011 14:35

wayyyy too much detail.

i would cut out everything about times your child sleeps and what time you need to get out and how bad that is

i would go clear and concise. the barking is unacceptable. it HAS to stop, we WILL be getting environmental health (or anyone else appropriate) involved.

as an aside, if a tree on your property is damaging THEIR property is IS your landlords problem and they could technically take her to court and make her pay for any damage caused.... so i really wouldn't enter into that at all

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hellospoon · 27/07/2011 14:36

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wellwisher · 27/07/2011 14:37

It's five times as long as it needs to be.
Don't mention the tree.
Don't say "yourselves" when you mean "you".

HTH

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porcamiseria · 27/07/2011 14:37

god thats harsh soup, how the fuck else can they handle it?

kill the fucking dogs, problem solved

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McTemp · 27/07/2011 14:38

I would cut half of that tbh - its quite accusatory and most likely to get their backs up. All the rhetorical questions ("how would you feel if you came home to bed and your neighbour was disrupting your right to live in peace?", "Why do you feel it is acceptable to disrupt us in such a way?" etc etc) are just far too much - it could be worded much nicer.

I will have a look over it and see which bits I would cut, if you want?

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DialMforMummy · 27/07/2011 14:38

I think you should stick to the point about the dogs being a nuisance without accusing them of doing it deliberately. I'd give them some sort of deadline to have this issue sorted and meanwhile keep a log and record the excessive barking. I'd also send a copy of this letter to their landlord.
I understand your are pissed off but the tone is pretty aggressive and this may put their backs up.

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DooinMeCleanin · 27/07/2011 14:38

What SD said.

It sounds very self pitying.

But feel free to report the issue to the council and ask your neighbours why they are neglecting the dog and what they intend to do about it. Happy dogs do not bark for hours on end. I'd suggest calling the RSPCA but I doubt they'll help. The dog warden might, if you have one.

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hellospoon · 27/07/2011 14:38

this is yesterday I really wanted to get across how it is affecting us as a family and for them to hopefully stop and think well actually we need to do something?

So should i just be plain and say it has to stop or we report you?

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zukiecat · 27/07/2011 14:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hellospoon · 27/07/2011 14:41

mctemp that would be great thank you

porcamiseria don't tempt me, it has crossed my mind.. dark chocolate over the fence by accident...

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dickiedavisthunderthighs · 27/07/2011 14:41

Dear (neighbour),

Despite raising this with you a number of times the barking from your dogs is now have a serious impact on the quality of our day to day lives.

Unless you keep your dogs in and address why they are barking all the time we will have no option but to contact environmental heath and will do so within the next seven days if no changes are made.

Yours sincerely,

hellospoon

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hellospoon · 27/07/2011 14:42

obviously i would NEVER hurt an animal. it is not the animals fault that it has shit owners. I have considered asking if they want me to walk it for them!

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WineAndPizza · 27/07/2011 14:43

I think you are obviously very emotional about this and sleep deprivation is horrible. However I think this could be phrased a bit better and in a more calm manner as this is bound to antagonise your neighbours, who you say are in most respects a decent bunch of people.

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DooinMeCleanin · 27/07/2011 14:43

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McTemp · 27/07/2011 14:43

What about something like:

Dear X,

We are writing to you regarding the continued disturbance from your dogs. We feel we have tried to resolve this on a number of occasions, but to no avail. Unfortunately with a family that works night shifts and has a young baby, it is really affecting our quality of life, and has become a very big problem for us.

It would help us massively if you would consider not leaving your dogs outside between the hours of X pm-X am.

We would be happy to meet with you to discuss this problem, and we are open to hearing any other solutions you want to suggest. Unfortunately if this problem is not resolved quickly, we feel we have no option but to report the noise to the Dog Warden, and this is something we really don?t wan?t to do, as good neighbourly relations are so important to us.

Many Thanks,

Mr & Mrs Hellosoon

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Allinabinbag · 27/07/2011 14:44

Hellospoon, I think the advice to simplify it is best. You need to state what it is you need them to do: e.g. bring the dog in by 8 so it is not barking outside, or make the dog bark less as the noise is excessive.

Your letter doesn't make it clear what you need them to do, nor what will happen if they don't.

I would say I hope we can resolve the matter between us, but if not, I will be reporting the dog barking to the local council noise officer.

The council do take this seriously, my landlady years ago was sent a letter from the council saying her dog barked excessively and that she had to stop it, he barked when no-one was home, so she ended up having to get sitters for him. His bark was terrible, though, it was just endless, so I am sympathetic.

I know this sounds silly, though, but why is your child being kept awake at night by the dog barking. Of course it is possible, I just wonder if there's anything you can do about that in the short term, move their room, let them fall asleep in your room, play a low music in the room etc. just to relieve the stress whilst trying to sort it out. Of course, it is not your fault the dog is barking, but it's unlikely they will be able to prevent it doing it completely, even if it is reduced/they bring the dog in at night.

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McTemp · 27/07/2011 14:45

dickiedavisthunderthighs's suggestion is good too - I would keep it simple like that.

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hellospoon · 27/07/2011 14:45

wine they are a nice couple, when it first started they told us that it was their kids fault leaving the dog out as they work nights but last night it was one of the mum's that answered the door and knew why i was knocking.

I am very emotional about it as it is really effecting all of us now!

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SoupDragon · 27/07/2011 14:45

i'm sorry you feel like that. it is, however, true.

if you only wish people to pander to you then please make that clear in your OP.

As it happens, next door have two yappy little rats [shrug]

if you want any sort of result from your letter bar fucking the neighbours off completely and making them less inclined to do anything the go ahead and send the letter that makes you sound like a loon. otherwise, rewrite it to sound more reasonable and less likely to make them pissed off and to dig their heels in. Letters like this are not about venting your anger to the person but about getting the result you want.

Imagine receiving that letter complaining about, say, the noise your child(ren) make. How would it make you feel? More or less likely to try to sort it to the satisfaction of both of you? more or less angry with your neighbours?
I know what effect it would have on me.

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cwtch4967 · 27/07/2011 14:46

That letter will just inflame the situation, don't send it. If you feel you have to write to them rather than talking things through then keep it very short and to the point.